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Do you feel that you need your boyfriend/girlfriend?
Poll
Need other person?
Just curious of the number of people that feel so. Poll function seems to be broken though 
Would "need" basically be a heavier form of "want"? Do we honestly need others?
How much do you think you would suffer if your partner left you? Or those that have already experienced such a thing unfortunatly...
Does anyone feel that they would pretty much die or is that to extreme?
•
Yes
•
No
Would "need" basically be a heavier form of "want"? Do we honestly need others?
How much do you think you would suffer if your partner left you? Or those that have already experienced such a thing unfortunatly...
Does anyone feel that they would pretty much die or is that to extreme?
Scroll to see replies
Reply 1
I don't need my boyfriend, but I quite like having him around. I would be completely heart broken if for some reason we broke up, but I don't need him to be happy. He add's to my happiness, but so do my friends. Being single doesn't really bother me, but i'm very happy in my relationship at the moment and don't plan on being single anytime soon.
I can function properly either in our out of a relationship. I don't get a sense of needing someone around, though I do want my boyfriend around. I think when it comes to relationships, needing someone is a stronger form of wanting them. That's how it sometimes feels at least. I do know that I don't need him, i'm my own person but i'm glad he sticks around.
I do feel that I would pretty much die, but I know that I wont. As much as I love him, after time, a break up would become easier to deal with and eventually, I would want to move on. I would be devastated though, i've never felt this way about anyone but it's something that you work through.
I can function properly either in our out of a relationship. I don't get a sense of needing someone around, though I do want my boyfriend around. I think when it comes to relationships, needing someone is a stronger form of wanting them. That's how it sometimes feels at least. I do know that I don't need him, i'm my own person but i'm glad he sticks around.
I do feel that I would pretty much die, but I know that I wont. As much as I love him, after time, a break up would become easier to deal with and eventually, I would want to move on. I would be devastated though, i've never felt this way about anyone but it's something that you work through.
Reply 2
Yes, i do need mine, and he openly admits he needs me.
If we split up, i don't know what i'd do, i'd be absolutely distraught. I'd have to agree with you, i would feel like i'd have to pretty much die. It does sound extreme, but then i'm in a very serious relationship, and we've been together through so much.
If we split up, i don't know what i'd do, i'd be absolutely distraught. I'd have to agree with you, i would feel like i'd have to pretty much die. It does sound extreme, but then i'm in a very serious relationship, and we've been together through so much.
Reply 3
I need mine, and I'm not ashamed to say so. Before I met my boyfriend I was maorly depressed, but didn't let anyone in on what was going on in my life. When I met him though, he seriously did something that made me want to let him in. Its true that I've had a few bad days, but I can get through them with my boyfriend, just as he talks to me about when he's down. Its a two way thing and thats important.
*ramble over*
*ramble over*
yes i need him, but we're not going out anymore so technically we're not boyfriend/ girlfriend.
he is the one person i solely trust and can tell anything and everything to, so yeah i need him. i dont think he could be replaced at this moment in time.
yes we all want a boyfriend or girlfriend. i dont think we NEED them to be there, it is a want, but then we expect them to be there so it turns into a need.
he is the one person i solely trust and can tell anything and everything to, so yeah i need him. i dont think he could be replaced at this moment in time.
yes we all want a boyfriend or girlfriend. i dont think we NEED them to be there, it is a want, but then we expect them to be there so it turns into a need.
Reply 5
Absolutely not, to answer your question of whether I need partner.
I pride and cherish my independence and wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. I am actually very shocked that more people have currently voted for "yes". It would be interesting to see if views of neeeding a partner varies with boys and girls.
I pride and cherish my independence and wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. I am actually very shocked that more people have currently voted for "yes". It would be interesting to see if views of neeeding a partner varies with boys and girls.
I need mine. I'm not ashamed to say it, but he is a bit, not sure of the right word to use for it, not exactly annoyed but mildly peeved about the fact I need him, because he doesn't want me to be dependant on him, especially when he leaves to go to Uni. He's got me through some really tough parts of my life, and knows things about me that I didn't realise until I started going out with him. I ahve my bad days, and he has his bad days, but we both understand, and make up for little tiffs as soon as we've calmed down a bit. I honestly don't know what I would do if we broke up, but I do know that I'd be heart broken, and that not much chocolate would survive...
anyways
anyways
Reply 8
Does anyone else see something wrong here?
You're all 18/19/20/21 and you already NEED a person outside of your immediate family. What would happen if -god forbid- you split up, or you get cheated on, or he/she is run over by a bus? Are you gonna wither away and die? Were you terminal before you met this person?
Jesus, don't you have things you want to do in your life? I do. I wanna see the world, meet people from every different culture on earth, play the drums in front of thousands etc etc I could go on all day.
But listening to you lot it sounds like your lives begin and end with this one person you're going out with. It also means you're not a complete person, as you NEED someone else to complete you.
Christ, even if/when I get married I wouldn't say I NEED my wife. Yes I'd love her, respect her etc and expect the same in return....but NEED? Needing someone gives them the power to do whatever they like with you and your emotions, if you need someone and they say, "give up X-hobby" or "move to X-country" then you will cos you NEED them....thus rendering you completely at their mercy and free to be taken advantage of.
I know it sounds drastic to say that needing someone is dangerous....but its a mentally and emotionally unhealthy way to be. Especially at your age. I mean, one poster here, who seems particularly attached to her b/f is seventeen, SEVENTEEN...not old enough to order a pint but she already needs a boy....christ I'd hate to see her when that particular relationship ends, which is likely as one party sounds more committed than the other. Another is using her b/f as a temporary cure for depression....it's gonna be worse when it ends you realise??
Are people here so weak/unstable/insecure? I think anyone who replied yes needs to sort their own life and issues out before embarking on a relationship.
Feel free to neg rep or flame if you feel so inclined. But I feel really strongly about this....manogamy is fine, its a beautiful thing, especially if the 2 ppl involved really love, cherish and respect each other....but to be dependant on another is close to a parasitic existence.
You're all 18/19/20/21 and you already NEED a person outside of your immediate family. What would happen if -god forbid- you split up, or you get cheated on, or he/she is run over by a bus? Are you gonna wither away and die? Were you terminal before you met this person?
Jesus, don't you have things you want to do in your life? I do. I wanna see the world, meet people from every different culture on earth, play the drums in front of thousands etc etc I could go on all day.
But listening to you lot it sounds like your lives begin and end with this one person you're going out with. It also means you're not a complete person, as you NEED someone else to complete you.
Christ, even if/when I get married I wouldn't say I NEED my wife. Yes I'd love her, respect her etc and expect the same in return....but NEED? Needing someone gives them the power to do whatever they like with you and your emotions, if you need someone and they say, "give up X-hobby" or "move to X-country" then you will cos you NEED them....thus rendering you completely at their mercy and free to be taken advantage of.
I know it sounds drastic to say that needing someone is dangerous....but its a mentally and emotionally unhealthy way to be. Especially at your age. I mean, one poster here, who seems particularly attached to her b/f is seventeen, SEVENTEEN...not old enough to order a pint but she already needs a boy....christ I'd hate to see her when that particular relationship ends, which is likely as one party sounds more committed than the other. Another is using her b/f as a temporary cure for depression....it's gonna be worse when it ends you realise??
Are people here so weak/unstable/insecure? I think anyone who replied yes needs to sort their own life and issues out before embarking on a relationship.
Feel free to neg rep or flame if you feel so inclined. But I feel really strongly about this....manogamy is fine, its a beautiful thing, especially if the 2 ppl involved really love, cherish and respect each other....but to be dependant on another is close to a parasitic existence.
Reply 9
No. It's a choice of mine to be single, or at least that's what I convince myself when I'm crying at night! Lol.
But seriously, no. It's too restricting. At this point in my life, it's not worth the pain I would feel when it inevitably finished. Humm..I should write that as a poem and get it published under "Larkin".
But seriously, no. It's too restricting. At this point in my life, it's not worth the pain I would feel when it inevitably finished. Humm..I should write that as a poem and get it published under "Larkin".
x.narb.x
None of you need your partners, you need water and food, not a bloody boyfriend/girlfriend.
:dito:
I don't mean to be all cynical, but there's a good chance that most of these relationships won't work out. I'm a big believer in needing to make yourself happy rather than relying on someone else to do it for you.
Reply 11
i love my gf, i cherish our relationship, i like our talks, our time together, the sex is phenomenal even after three years
do i need her no way, if we broke up id be hurt badly but id get over it.
You should never need anyone to live your life, if you do need someone then it shows a severe lack of soemthing in your own life. It shows an insecurity that you refuse to work on because its safer not to cos youve got someone there beside you to take the slack if you fall over.
your are dependant on food, water, warmth, money, (and only to buy food) you are not dependant on people and never ever should be
do i need her no way, if we broke up id be hurt badly but id get over it.
You should never need anyone to live your life, if you do need someone then it shows a severe lack of soemthing in your own life. It shows an insecurity that you refuse to work on because its safer not to cos youve got someone there beside you to take the slack if you fall over.
your are dependant on food, water, warmth, money, (and only to buy food) you are not dependant on people and never ever should be
Reply 12
I've changed, I used to always be really cynical and fiercely independent, but now I feel that I do need some physical contact. Just a cuddle every so often. Thats only come on since I had depression and feel like **** though.
I feel guilty that its bf I want but I do turn to others (to put it in a nice innocent way!
) when I'm lonely.
I feel guilty that its bf I want but I do turn to others (to put it in a nice innocent way!
) when I'm lonely.Reply 13
I don't need a bf but it's always nice to be going out with someone and having someone there etc...
Reply 14
x.narb.x
None of you need your partners, you need water and food, not a bloody boyfriend/girlfriend.
Is there not more to life than just living?
Reply 15
TopSortedMadForIt
Does anyone else see something wrong here?
You're all 18/19/20/21 and you already NEED a person outside of your immediate family. What would happen if -god forbid- you split up, or you get cheated on, or he/she is run over by a bus? Are you gonna wither away and die? Were you terminal before you met this person?
Jesus, don't you have things you want to do in your life? I do. I wanna see the world, meet people from every different culture on earth, play the drums in front of thousands etc etc I could go on all day.
But listening to you lot it sounds like your lives begin and end with this one person you're going out with. It also means you're not a complete person, as you NEED someone else to complete you.
Christ, even if/when I get married I wouldn't say I NEED my wife. Yes I'd love her, respect her etc and expect the same in return....but NEED? Needing someone gives them the power to do whatever they like with you and your emotions, if you need someone and they say, "give up X-hobby" or "move to X-country" then you will cos you NEED them....thus rendering you completely at their mercy and free to be taken advantage of.
I know it sounds drastic to say that needing someone is dangerous....but its a mentally and emotionally unhealthy way to be. Especially at your age. I mean, one poster here, who seems particularly attached to her b/f is seventeen, SEVENTEEN...not old enough to order a pint but she already needs a boy....christ I'd hate to see her when that particular relationship ends, which is likely as one party sounds more committed than the other. Another is using her b/f as a temporary cure for depression....it's gonna be worse when it ends you realise??
Are people here so weak/unstable/insecure? I think anyone who replied yes needs to sort their own life and issues out before embarking on a relationship.
Feel free to neg rep or flame if you feel so inclined. But I feel really strongly about this....manogamy is fine, its a beautiful thing, especially if the 2 ppl involved really love, cherish and respect each other....but to be dependant on another is close to a parasitic existence.
You're all 18/19/20/21 and you already NEED a person outside of your immediate family. What would happen if -god forbid- you split up, or you get cheated on, or he/she is run over by a bus? Are you gonna wither away and die? Were you terminal before you met this person?
Jesus, don't you have things you want to do in your life? I do. I wanna see the world, meet people from every different culture on earth, play the drums in front of thousands etc etc I could go on all day.
But listening to you lot it sounds like your lives begin and end with this one person you're going out with. It also means you're not a complete person, as you NEED someone else to complete you.
Christ, even if/when I get married I wouldn't say I NEED my wife. Yes I'd love her, respect her etc and expect the same in return....but NEED? Needing someone gives them the power to do whatever they like with you and your emotions, if you need someone and they say, "give up X-hobby" or "move to X-country" then you will cos you NEED them....thus rendering you completely at their mercy and free to be taken advantage of.
I know it sounds drastic to say that needing someone is dangerous....but its a mentally and emotionally unhealthy way to be. Especially at your age. I mean, one poster here, who seems particularly attached to her b/f is seventeen, SEVENTEEN...not old enough to order a pint but she already needs a boy....christ I'd hate to see her when that particular relationship ends, which is likely as one party sounds more committed than the other. Another is using her b/f as a temporary cure for depression....it's gonna be worse when it ends you realise??
Are people here so weak/unstable/insecure? I think anyone who replied yes needs to sort their own life and issues out before embarking on a relationship.
Feel free to neg rep or flame if you feel so inclined. But I feel really strongly about this....manogamy is fine, its a beautiful thing, especially if the 2 ppl involved really love, cherish and respect each other....but to be dependant on another is close to a parasitic existence.
I agree with you, I used to think that I actually needed a bf to make me happy but there are much more important things in life and although being in a good relationship always makes life seem alot better, i'm sure people can live without a bf/gf and be happy just getting on with their lives, seeing friends and family etc.
Reply 16
Cadre_Of_Storms
your are dependant on food, water, warmth, money, (and only to buy food) you are not dependant on people and never ever should be
To what extent? Sure if you go and live in a cave isolated from human contact you might well stay alive. But I think your quality of life would be severely reduced. Maybe most people would be just as happy, I don't know.
There are some things, beyond those biolochemically fundamental to the perpetuation of your own life, which I require to maintain my quality of life.
And without a certain quality of life I can't see any merits in merely existing.
Reply 17
I think it's quite dangerous to 'need' someone so much that you base your happiness on them, and rely on them to be there for you all the time, as it means that when you are single you don't know how to cope with your problems by yourself. I don't 'need' my boyfriend to be who I am, or to be confident and happy, but that doesn't mean that I love him any less.
Reply 18
I need other people. That's not to say that there's one particular person I couldn't live without, because at the end of the day all you really need is all you need to exist. But if I didn't have anyone I don't think I'd see a point. I have friends & family, and some people in that are more important than others. Yet it's not the people in particular I need - I just need to be cared about, and I think that's what people are mixing up. They don't necessarily need their boyfriend/girlfriend, but they do need someone to love them. That person could be anyone, but right now it's their partner, so in their eyes, they need that person.
I disagree with topsortedmadforit. Noone ever died of a broken heart. So what if people think that they need their boyfriend/girlfriend? If that makes them happy right now, what's to say that any amount of cynicism down the line is going to change that? Currently that's how they feel, therefore it's true, and maybe that'll change in the future, but the here and now is what matters, people can't go living their lives for the future any more than they can for the past, both are destructive ways of living.
I don't need a boyfriend/girlfriend, I just need to be cared about.
I disagree with topsortedmadforit. Noone ever died of a broken heart. So what if people think that they need their boyfriend/girlfriend? If that makes them happy right now, what's to say that any amount of cynicism down the line is going to change that? Currently that's how they feel, therefore it's true, and maybe that'll change in the future, but the here and now is what matters, people can't go living their lives for the future any more than they can for the past, both are destructive ways of living.
I don't need a boyfriend/girlfriend, I just need to be cared about.
Wildebeest
That's beautiful. Look, to the cynics on here, why is it a bad thing that other people differ? Yes, there are many naive, ultimately short-lasting relationships which people can have at the age of 17, but there are also ones which turn out to be fruitful and rewarding.
TopSortedMadForIt - what correlation is there between Sephrenia ordering a pint and depending on someone? That's right - there isn't any.
Look, to the cynics on here, why is it a bad thing that other people differ? Yes, there are many naive, ultimately short-lasting relationships which people can have at the age of 17, but there are also ones which turn out to be fruitful and rewarding.TopSortedMadForIt - what correlation is there between Sephrenia ordering a pint and depending on someone? That's right - there isn't any.
Thank you
to both parts. You beat me to setting TopSortedMadForIt on the right tracks..or at least attempting to 
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