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    (Original post by the bear)
    can someone clarify if the contracts are 40hours pw or zero hours ? ideally i would prefer part-time / flexitime or jobshare to fit in with my other commitments

    shukran

    abu bear
    :rofl:
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    (Original post by HAnwar)
    Can this stuff get anymore fake.
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    :rofl: I thought this was actually fake!
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    (Original post by HucktheForde)
    x
    Entry requirements are so high Kappa
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    (Original post by XxKingSniprxX)
    Entry requirements are so high Kappa
    LOL

    1800+ total lvl required, yeah?
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    (Original post by Student403)
    LOL

    1800+ total lvl required, yeah?
    Nah, its all about the 200m xp in all skills + 2277 total level.

    They only recruit Maxed completionist players = best of the best :rofl:
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    (Original post by XxKingSniprxX)
    Nah, its all about the 200m xp in all skills + 2277 total level.

    They only recruit Maxed completionist players = best of the best :rofl:
    But what if I am a ranged pure :cry2:
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    (Original post by 0123456543210)
    Good morning, Mr Abu Bear.
    After hearing your concern I have contacted our HR department and they have said that we have a range of roles on the part-time basis available, to the likes of the Reserve Army. If you choose to join our reserves, you would have to complete our 12 week training period, first 6 weeks would be dedicated to physical training, and the remaining time you would have to attend basic literacy and numeracy classes. On successful completion of this training period, you will be given a notice with the minimum amount of hours you need to dedicate to our Reserve Army which is dependant on your chosen role, the list of suitable roles would be sent to you by post after testing your competencies. For example: an engineering technician in our Horse reserves would be required to dedicate a minimum of a full week (7 days) per 30 day period.

    Thank you for your enquiry,
    Yours sincerely,

    Mr Abutamed Goattyviolator
    Reserves Administration Team.
    Thank you for your prompt reply Mr Goattyviolator. The Reserve position sounds ideal for my current circumstances. Do the Reserves have to make do with the less attractive sex slaves, or are they on an equal footing with the Regular dudes ?
    Also i understand that the battlefield language is colloquial Arabic. i can manage fine with Google Translate, so would i be able to take my computer with me on operations ? it is fairly heavy unfortunately and needs a 240V power source. On the plus side i do have Spotify so could play any songs the guys requested.

    Hope to hear from you soon

    Abu Bear Al-Britanni
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    Imagine your application got rejected. How embarassing would that be?
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    (Original post by the bear)
    Thank you for your prompt reply Mr Goattyviolator. The Reserve position sounds ideal for my current circumstances. Do the Reserves have to make do with the less attractive sex slaves, or are they on an equal footing with the Regular dudes ?
    Also i understand that the battlefield language is colloquial Arabic. i can manage fine with Google Translate, so would i be able to take my computer with me on operations ? it is fairly heavy unfortunately and needs a 240V power source. On the plus side i do have Spotify so could play any songs the guys requested.

    Hope to hear from you soon

    Abu Bear Al-Britanni
    Both Reservists and Regulars are equal in the eyes of Allah, we do not discriminate against people by their position, marital status, race, ethnicity, political preference, language spoken; yet I am afraid that we do discriminate against your sexual preference and gender. You will have all the privileges of Regular soldiers, including: horses, goats, small children and other warriors if you wish. I would recommend, however, stretching your anus right thoroughly and see our informational video as to the lifestyle as well as the requirements of living in one of our lovely camps http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=f08_1424123423 .
    Language spoken is not a problem since we have many english-speaking jihadis, including the famous John from London (who is particularly good at giving head).
    Hope this helps.

    Thank you for your enquiry,
    Reserves Administration Team.
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    (Original post by 0123456543210)
    Both Reservists and Regulars are equal in the eyes of Allah, we do not discriminate against people by their position, marital status, race, ethnicity, political preference, language spoken; yet I am afraid that we do discriminate against your sexual preference and gender. You will have all the privileges of Regular soldiers, including: horses, goats, small children and other warriors if you wish. I would recommend, however, stretching your anus right thoroughly and see our informational video as to the lifestyle as well as the requirements of living in one of our lovely camps http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=f08_1424123423 .
    Language spoken is not a problem since we have many english-speaking jihadis, including the famous John from London (who is particularly good at giving head).
    Hope this helps.

    Thank you for your enquiry,
    Reserves Administration Team.

    that sounds ideal my brother !
    i do find that i am triggered by specific interactions; could you guarantee that the other fighters will not make fun of my hair color or freckles ?
    i am sure that you provide safe spaces for members whose resilience buckets are emptied.
    i am looking forward to meeting you all. Mr John sounds like a real character !
    as regards the stretching you mentioned; is there any recommended size ? perhaps you could recommend some films to watch which would give me a rough idea.

    thanks again for your concern

    Abu Bear Alqadib Dakhma
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    Coming up next on TSR: I've filled out the application form for ISIS and now I have a job interview. What should I wear?
    • TSR Support Team
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    TSR Support Team
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    Seems very normal :lol:. Not sure what I expected but it wasn't that.

    (Original post by thunder_chunky)
    Coming up next on TSR: I've filled out the application form for ISIS and now I have a job interview. What should I wear?
    Anything. Because you'd be an asset to any organisation . They'd be lucky to have you.
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    (Original post by thunder_chunky)
    Coming up next on TSR: I've filled out the application form for ISIS and now I have a job interview. What should I wear?
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    Okay so i've filled in the form, which address do i send it to?
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    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
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    you win today's internet. heck you win THIS WEEK'S internet !!!!!

    :congrats:
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    (Original post by thunder_chunky)
    Coming up next on TSR: I've filled out the application form for ISIS and now I have a job interview. What should I wear?
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    (Original post by the bear)
    Bodybag black is the new black.
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    (Original post by thunder_chunky)
    Bodybag black is the new black.
    this is the new season model; it features an EZ-Zip with large luminous tab so things go smoothly even in the dark.
    customer feedback has led us to increase the width; many of the brethren are now from the less svelte corners of the Ummah.
    the material is still high quality PVC but we have now introduced a brushed effect. this is both stylish and practical, reducing the danger of reflections whilst preserving the popular silky feel against the occupant's skin.
    we help you feel your best and look smart and professional on your final journey.
 
 
 
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