My friend's husband Watch

Flexchm
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My friend who used be very close to me gave me her mobile number and didn't warn me that her husband gets very jealous if another guy called her. So when I called he answered and was very abrupt to me on asking me so many questions like a defective in a rude tone so I had a hung up. She a week later blocked me on Facebook and when I Sow her at uni she told me it was very rude of me to hung up on her husband. Our friend in common agreed with her that I was rude. I really think she is the one who was rude by not giving me a warning. I was actually feeling very down all day how her husband was abrupt to me on the phone. Who is right me or her?
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Blondie987
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Her husband should never have control over who she speaks to, if it really is as bad as him trying to stop you from seeing each other. I'd say to her if you could speak in private and let her know how you're feeling, don't be blunt or harsh but just try to let her understand that this isn't normal behaviour
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(Original post by Blondie987)
Her husband should never have control over who she speaks to, if it really is as bad as him trying to stop you from seeing each other. I'd say to her if you could speak in private and let her know how you're feeling, don't be blunt or harsh but just try to let her understand that this isn't normal behaviour
Lol typical female post.
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Blondie987
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Lol typical female post.
Lol typical anon post
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Flexchm
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I tried and that's when she blocked me on Facebook. I was shocked because she was my closest friend during that time, her reaction was too much. Perhaps she had a horrible time from her husband because of me. maybe the 100 questions wasn't enough for him. I did tell him Im her friend from uni I just want to check if she's ok & how she got on with her exams. He was asking how do u know her, how did u meet, so many why questions very abrupt tone. He even kept constantly calling me after but I didn't answer he started leaving me text messages calling me a coward and rude and telling me to stay away from her..


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Flexchm
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I just don't know how our other friend in common agreed with her


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whorace
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I see.

Lonely wife gives number to guy and her husband gets aggressive because she's flirting with other guys, it's just a huge cycle of anger and frustration isn't it?
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999tigger
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(Original post by whorace)
I see.

Lonely wife gives number to guy and her husband gets aggressive because she's flirting with other guys, it's just a huge cycle of anger and frustration isn't it?
How did you get to flirting?


OP it all sounds rather dull. What you havent realised is that her partner sound very controlling and is likely giving her a whole lot of grief over the situation.

If she was that good a friend she will listen. Just apologise, say you didnt mean to cause any trouble and was taken aback by how intrusive and aggressive the questioning was wehn all youd done was ring to check up how her exams had gone. She either believes you or she doesnt. If she doesnt then its her loss as you know the truth and shes not interested.
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ranz
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dont push your relationship with her, why go through the struggle? let them deal with it


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999tigger
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They miight have decided you were rude becayse you left it ambiguously and refused his calls which in turn has caused her more hassle.
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OP, it's not you. It's them. That telephone dialogue with your friend's husband sounds awful, and although ideally you would not hang up but rather just go along with it for the sake of your friend, he does sound extremely controlling and rude. You were sort of ambushed and attacked and in that context I don't blame you for hanging up. It's a shame your friend is so much under his thumb and cannot see your perspective in this situation. But if that's all it takes for someone to blank you out of their lives, you are better off without her friendship in the long term, as hurtful as it may be now.
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Flexchm
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(Original post by Yellow 03)
OP, it's not you. It's them. That telephone dialogue with your friend's husband sounds awful, and although ideally you would not hang up but rather just go along with it for the sake of your friend, he does sound extremely controlling and rude. You were sort of ambushed and attacked and in that context I don't blame you for hanging up. It's a shame your friend is so much under his thumb and cannot see your perspective in this situation. But if that's all it takes for someone to blank you out of their lives, you are better off without her friendship in the long term, as hurtful as it may be now.
Thanks for commenting, yea she did tell me before how she feels with him describing herself as a body without a soul. I think she did that delibratly for attention, so he can maybe value her more so another man ' in this case me' doesn't take her but it fired back?! she did tell me once how she doesn't feel loved she feel used.
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Flexchm
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(Original post by 999tigger)
They miight have decided you were rude becayse you left it ambiguously and refused his calls which in turn has caused her more hassle.
yes that's what they said exactly
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999tigger
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(Original post by Flexchm)
yes that's what they said exactly
So the bit you are unaware of is just how much hassle this has caused your friend because you dont understand how controlling and jealous her husband is.

Look at the bigger picture.

Sometimes in life its easier to say sorry, even where you dont feel its all your fault. Weigh that against having your friend. Btw is her husband caucasian or is there anything to do with culture?
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Flexchm
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(Original post by 999tigger)
How did you get to flirting?


OP it all sounds rather dull. What you havent realised is that her partner sound very controlling and is likely giving her a whole lot of grief over the situation.

If she was that good a friend she will listen. Just apologise, say you didnt mean to cause any trouble and was taken aback by how intrusive and aggressive the questioning was wehn all youd done was ring to check up how her exams had gone. She either believes you or she doesnt. If she doesnt then its her loss as you know the truth and shes not interested.
when I sow her after I apologised if that has caused her any hassle, she said I should've never have hung up and should have answered his calls when he tried to call as that has made him more agitated. I was really surprised as she seemed a completely different person
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Flexchm
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(Original post by 999tigger)
So the bit you are unaware of is just how much hassle this has caused your friend because you dont understand how controlling and jealous her husband is.

Look at the bigger picture.

Sometimes in life its easier to say sorry, even where you dont feel its all your fault. Weigh that against having your friend. Btw is her husband caucasian or is there anything to do with culture?
I did say sorry and was expecting her to say sorry too as I was very hurt. yes, they are both from central Africa
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999tigger
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Thing is you know very little about him or their marriage. he could have reacted very jealously and very badly becayse he doesnt know you or your intentions. Use the friend as a go between, but tbh it all sounds like a big pain and that now the husband knows about you any contact with her is going to cause someone grief.
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Josb
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(Original post by 999tigger)
Sometimes in life its easier to say sorry, even where you dont feel its all your fault. Weigh that against having your friend. Btw is her husband caucasian or is there anything to do with culture?
Good guess, albeit not difficult.
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999tigger
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(Original post by Josb)
Good guess, albeit not difficult.
Wasnt guessing i was asking. I was wondering why the husbands response was so extreme.
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BWV1007
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If there's that much pressure in their marriage, they're not gonna last long... Oops have I said something taboo?
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