Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    10
    ReputationRep:
    I got into this really great sixth form college - it has better teachers, facilities and opportunities than my current school.

    However I've realised that everyone who goes there is amazing! All my (possible) future classmates seem to be much smarter and more confident than me so I am a bit worried that I won't fit in.

    Should I stay, so that my self-confidence can stay as it is or move and risk the fact that my confidence could be destroyed, but have a greater chance of being successful in the future?
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    This is definitely a hard choice to make but it's important to make the right choice for you, for the right reasons.

    It's important to seriously consider your self-confidence. It may seem a bit petty but honestly you need to think about how you learn best. For example, if you feel more comfortable and happier nearer the top of the class in your subjects, then if you move you have to be prepared for this to potentially change and it's important to consider how that'll affect you over the course of 2 years. A levels/BTECs (sixth form in general) are hard and everyone and I mean everyone goes through a crisis of confidence at some point, sometimes a few times over whether you'll get the grades you want or are targeted. If you do move and feel as though your fellow students are smarter this might happen to you quite quickly or you might just feel a bit overwhelmed, perhaps a bit more so than if you moved. That being said, sixth form is always a step up wherever you go and know that these students who seem smarter and more confident will be going through exactly the same process and will be feeling exactly the same as you will - they're just a bit better at hiding it!

    Another thing to perhaps think about is this sixth form college has better facilities and teachers etc which presumably means they get better grades or perhaps a larger proportion of higher grades. As a high performing college, there might be additional pressure to perform to the best of your ability which could be something extra to contend with, especially if you're worried about your self-confidence.

    That being said, this is a great opportunity to go somewhere new, make new friends and really make the most of any and all the opportunities given to you that weren't previously available. Everyone who goes there might be amazing but so are you!!! They offered you a place and want you to attend, which means they must know that you are every bit as smart as all the other pupils you've met who currently go there! You could also be giving yourself the best chance possible in this next stage which is really important as good grades etc can get you where you want to go whether that's uni or the world of work. Also, if you do move on to uni or the working or whatever, this move, although scary and might be a bit of a gamble, is a great way to show yourself you can do it. You can go into uni or a new environment full of strangers thinking 'I can do this, I did it 2 years ago and I can do it again!'. But also remember that results aren't everything, you don't have to go to a school with better teachers etc to get the grades you want and even if you don't get the grades you're hoping for, they aren't the be all and end all anyway!

    Importantly, there'll be new people just like you who are worried that they're moving somewhere where they don't know anyone and that they're not confident like the other pupils. Perhaps their confidence is a result of going there you never know!

    I don't know how much this helped but all in all I think there are lots of things to be considered when thinking about moving but ultimately you should make the decision for yourself and know that you've made the right choice for your happiness/confidence and your future and only you can decide which is going to take precidence in this situation. But know that whatever decision you make it isn't up to anyone else, don't feel pressured to make a decision if you're not 100% sure or happy. Results aren't everything and it's enitrely ok to prioritise yourself and your own self-confidence, especially if it's fragile, and stay where you are. You don't have to push yourself into a new situation if you don't feel ready to or if you have doubts.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    10
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Hgalpin)
    This is definitely a hard choice to make but it's important to make the right choice for you, for the right reasons.

    It's important to seriously consider your self-confidence. It may seem a bit petty but honestly you need to think about how you learn best. For example, if you feel more comfortable and happier nearer the top of the class in your subjects, then if you move you have to be prepared for this to potentially change and it's important to consider how that'll affect you over the course of 2 years. A levels/BTECs (sixth form in general) are hard and everyone and I mean everyone goes through a crisis of confidence at some point, sometimes a few times over whether you'll get the grades you want or are targeted. If you do move and feel as though your fellow students are smarter this might happen to you quite quickly or you might just feel a bit overwhelmed, perhaps a bit more so than if you moved. That being said, sixth form is always a step up wherever you go and know that these students who seem smarter and more confident will be going through exactly the same process and will be feeling exactly the same as you will - they're just a bit better at hiding it!

    Another thing to perhaps think about is this sixth form college has better facilities and teachers etc which presumably means they get better grades or perhaps a larger proportion of higher grades. As a high performing college, there might be additional pressure to perform to the best of your ability which could be something extra to contend with, especially if you're worried about your self-confidence.

    That being said, this is a great opportunity to go somewhere new, make new friends and really make the most of any and all the opportunities given to you that weren't previously available. Everyone who goes there might be amazing but so are you!!! They offered you a place and want you to attend, which means they must know that you are every bit as smart as all the other pupils you've met who currently go there! You could also be giving yourself the best chance possible in this next stage which is really important as good grades etc can get you where you want to go whether that's uni or the world of work. Also, if you do move on to uni or the working or whatever, this move, although scary and might be a bit of a gamble, is a great way to show yourself you can do it. You can go into uni or a new environment full of strangers thinking 'I can do this, I did it 2 years ago and I can do it again!'. But also remember that results aren't everything, you don't have to go to a school with better teachers etc to get the grades you want and even if you don't get the grades you're hoping for, they aren't the be all and end all anyway!

    Importantly, there'll be new people just like you who are worried that they're moving somewhere where they don't know anyone and that they're not confident like the other pupils. Perhaps their confidence is a result of going there you never know!

    I don't know how much this helped but all in all I think there are lots of things to be considered when thinking about moving but ultimately you should make the decision for yourself and know that you've made the right choice for your happiness/confidence and your future and only you can decide which is going to take precidence in this situation. But know that whatever decision you make it isn't up to anyone else, don't feel pressured to make a decision if you're not 100% sure or happy. Results aren't everything and it's enitrely ok to prioritise yourself and your own self-confidence, especially if it's fragile, and stay where you are. You don't have to push yourself into a new situation if you don't feel ready to or if you have doubts.
    Ahh thank you so much for writing this!
    It really gave me some stuff to consider and I will definitely take what you said into account!
    I'm still undecided and have to make my decision to leave quite soon haha but thanks, now I have a lot of thinking to do!
 
 
 
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • Poll
    Are unpaid trial work shifts fair?
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

    Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

    Quick reply
    Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.