Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free
x Turn on thread page Beta

Spying parents stopping me from seeing my boyfriend! watch

    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by mrsjenner)


    How do you know he's not abusive, seriously with you.
    1) Assumption of innocence

    2) OP's testimony
    Offline

    19
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by mrsjenner)
    You don't know OP either. You're getting frustrated because you don't have the capacity to explain yourself like an intelligent person
    You know you are looking at someone who is losing both the argument and their patience when they start insulting the people they are talking to.
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Georgia2261)
    His family issues are completely different, he doesn't even have a relationship with his dad because of whats happened.This is why i say i know he would never act the same.
    OP, you're literally 15 so how would you know how severe the abuse is? you seem quite naive if you think your parents are in the wrong here. also, don't complain about privacy if you cant afford to move out. your parents are just looking out for you. after all, you're only a minor so at the end of they day they do have the last word in what you do and who you're with at least until you're 16
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Justmoll28)
    OP, you're literally 15 so how would you know how severe the abuse is? you seem quite naive if you think your parents are in the wrong here. also, don't complain about privacy if you cant afford to move out. your parents are just looking out for you. after all, you're only a minor so at the end of they day they do have the last word in what you do and who you're with at least until you're 16
    I've never once said i cant afford to move out, its illegal, im 15. So you think its right that theyve read months worth of messages and set up cameras?
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Good bloke)
    You know you are looking at someone who is losing both the argument and their patience when they start insulting the people they are talking to.
    I'm quite calm and content here, just speaking the language of the person who responded to me. You're showing the same symptoms, you know what with quoting me to discuss irrelevant stuff...
    Offline

    19
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Georgia2261)
    We found out two days ago that my parents have been reading all of mine and my boyfriends messages and even setting up cameras in the house to see what were up too! They keep saying that my boyfriend is emotionally abusive and obsessive because he asks where I am and what I am doing but I know he only does this because he cares.

    They have said that they want me to end the relationship and that I'm not allowed to see him! Me and my boyfriend are both happy in the relationship and disagree with what they are saying! I don't want to end the relationship as we both love each other and want to fight for this.

    Has anyone been through anything similar and could offer some advice?
    Denial of obsessive and mental abuse is very common in the victim. Your parents have picked on it due to the camera recordings, this is how it all starts. Next he'll beat you, you'll be saying he loves you and is sorry and hide your bruises until the next time and next....
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Justmoll28)
    OP, you're literally 15 so how would you know how severe the abuse is? you seem quite naive if you think your parents are in the wrong here. also, don't complain about privacy if you cant afford to move out. your parents are just looking out for you. after all, you're only a minor so at the end of they day they do have the last word in what you do and who you're with at least until you're 16
    The lone voice of reason, you've got a handful to deal with here...this is a stubborn lot
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Georgia2261)
    I've never once said i cant afford to move out, its illegal, im 15. So you think its right that theyve read months worth of messages and set up cameras?
    i think you need to understand that they are the grown ups and they are in charge and they will do as they please in their house under their roof until you leave, if you have an issue, talk to them in a mature manner (that might be difficult) but if you can whinge on tsr then you can strike up a conversation with the grown ups about it without kicking and screaming.
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by mrsjenner)
    You don't know OP either. You're getting frustrated because you don't have the capacity to explain yourself like an intelligent person
    Clearly.
    I don't have the capacity to explain myself to a dip**** like you.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Mahmoud X)
    1) Assumption of innocence

    2) OP's testimony
    Well I'm assuming her parents are innocent. You resorted to calling me an idiot and whatnot is unnecessary.
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by mrsjenner)
    The lone voice of reason, you've got a handful to deal with here...this is a stubborn lot
    what do you mean?
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by SMEGGGY)
    Denial of obsessive and mental abuse is very common in the victim. Your parents have picked on it due to the camera recordings, this is how it all starts. Next he'll beat you, you'll be saying he loves you and is sorry and hide your bruises until the next time and next....
    All the camera recording show is us looking for a pack of playing cards in his office.. they think he is abusing me because he asks where i am and what i am doing. i have illnesses and he only does this because he cares
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Justmoll28)
    OP, you're literally 15 so how would you know how severe the abuse is? you seem quite naive if you think your parents are in the wrong here. also, don't complain about privacy if you cant afford to move out. your parents are just looking out for you. after all, you're only a minor so at the end of they day they do have the last word in what you do and who you're with at least until you're 16
    Pretty much all of this is wrong.


    They have a legal duty of care, at least, until OP is 18 or she is 16 and they give their permission, but even though they are (supposed to be) taking care of her, they don't have the right to treat her as if she is property, when she is a human being with her own autonomy.

    (Original post by Justmoll28)
    i think you need to understand that they are the grown ups and they are in charge and they will do as they please in their house under their roof until you leave, if you have an issue, talk to them in a mature manner (that might be difficult) but if you can whinge on tsr then you can strike up a conversation with the grown ups about it without kicking and screaming.
    The law still applies to them, even inside private property.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by thefatone)
    I don't have the capacity to explain myself to a dip**** like you.
    lmao now explain how I'm a "dipshit." You have failed to explain anything, you're just being emotional

    I'm a dipshit for understanding that her folks are doing their best to protect her?

    Right, of course :lolwut:

    You'd rather defend a negligent parent who is standing by not concerned who their kid is befriending and dating...

    Sure they're being annoying as **** but it's for the best in the long run. You could be like 13 and fail to see this yourself.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Justmoll28)
    what do you mean?
    I mean you're the lone/only voice of reason here, but the people in this thread will be a handful to convince.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Justmoll28)
    i think you need to understand that they are the grown ups and they are in charge and they will do as they please in their house under their roof until you leave, if you have an issue, talk to them in a mature manner (that might be difficult) but if you can whinge on tsr then you can strike up a conversation with the grown ups about it without kicking and screaming.
    we have had mature conversations about it, i wasn't whining at all, i was just seeing if anyone had advice. But quite frankly sending me over to the hospital to end the relationship just hours after he got out of surgery is spiteful
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by mrsjenner)
    lmao now explain how I'm a "dipshit." You have failed to explain anything, you're just being emotional

    I'm a dipshit for understanding that her folks are doing their best to protect her?

    Right, of course :lolwut:

    You'd rather defend a negligent parent who is standing by not concerned who their kid is befriending and dating...

    Sure they're being annoying as **** but it's for the best in the long run. You could be like 13 and fail to see this yourself.
    i don't base my opinions on emotion.
    this is your interpretation of the situation
    why would i stand up for someone who can't even take care of their child properly? IMO i wouldn't ever want kids so this doesn't concern me too much

    This is the problem, is the decision the parents really the best for OP in the long run or is it just bc the parents don't like OPs bf and just want to get rid of him from her life?
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by mrsjenner)
    lmao sure you are. Never knew white Christians arranged marriages...I never implied you're a Muslim.

    I quite specifically said you are one, because I know you are one.
    This is all quite funny, you can't sit and defend yourself and say you're right and everyone else is wrong but you've just stated that im a muslim because you "know i am one" you dont know me so how you know what race i am or what religious beliefs i hold are beyond me. i can tell you that i am a white christian, but quite frankly i dont need to justify anything to you
    • Study Helper
    • Welcome Squad
    Offline

    18
    ReputationRep:
    Study Helper
    Welcome Squad
    (Original post by Georgia2261)
    We found out two days ago that my parents have been reading all of mine and my boyfriends messages and even setting up cameras in the house to see what were up too! They keep saying that my boyfriend is emotionally abusive and obsessive because he asks where I am and what I am doing but I know he only does this because he cares. They have said that they want me to end the relationship and that I'm not allowed to see him! Me and my boyfriend are both happy in the relationship and disagree with what they are saying! I don't want to end the relationship as we both love each other and want to fight for this.
    has anyone been through anything similar and could offer some advice?
    Well, me and my girlfriend won't be able to meet up for another couple of years because of parents. The trick is to just ignore your parents.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by thefatone)
    i don't base my opinions on emotion.
    this is your interpretation of the situation
    why would i stand up for someone who can't even take care of their child properly? IMO i wouldn't ever want kids so this doesn't concern me too much

    This is the problem, is the decision the parents really the best for OP in the long run or is it just bc the parents don't like OPs bf and just want to get rid of him from her life?
    It could be the last sentence. As OP keeps explaining herself she lets out bits of her private life. It very very well could be that they just want her with a certain type of person, for whatever reason. Maybe they don't trust OP because she lost their respect, though. Maybe they're overreacting. But still. The idea is that they are concerned. Parents aren't automated robots that do everything perfectly. They might be flawed but with good intentions. I support the intention.
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
Turn on thread page Beta
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: March 14, 2016
Poll
Do you agree with the proposed ban on plastic straws and cotton buds?

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Write a reply...
Reply
Hide
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.