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    My boyfriend's dad doesn't like me much and my bf wasn't worried about telling as he wasn't looking for approval or to please him but he couldn't be bothered with any lectures or anything like that but we chose just to tell him upfront, no hiding anything and he was actually quite cool about it and said he saw it coming and has even offered to chip in with the wedding cost. Best to be honest and open. Its best she hears it from you rather than someone accidentally brings it up to her thinking she already knew you were engaged.
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    i am 17 and he is 19. we are both in the military so we don't go home much.
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    Take her out for a meal and break it to her then. She may other like your other half, but you love him and that should be important to her. She'll understand.
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    Tell her as soon as possible, the longer you keep it from her the more annoyed she may be (from being kept out of the loop) and the more likely it will be that she might find out from someone else (which would be really bad).

    You need to tell her the reasons behind it and that it isnt just some niave decision.
    Tbh, what are her reasons for not liking your fiance anyway? Because if you could address these maybe she will e more accepting of it.

    If you are very young like 18-21, then i wouldnt bet on her being happy whatever way you say it, because for most people that is too young, and it may seem like a silly thing to do. I'm not saying it is even if you are this age, just that this is how a lot of people will see it.

    Just tell her, face to face or on the phone if that's not possible (defintely not be text or facebook), and tell her that you are very very happy. Even if she has issues with it, i like to think a mother will be able to look past these (as long as they are just concerns and not real problems) if she can see that you are really happy.
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    (Original post by BLondecroft)
    i am 17 and he is 19. we are both in the military so we don't go home much.
    You're probably going to face a lot more scary things in both your military career and in a lifelong commitment to your spouse. Both of these should be infinitely more terrifying than telling your parents.



    Just sit get your parents together, sit them down on the sofa with a brew. Bring your fiance with you. They'll probably be shocked at first and then maybe angry. Let them rant for a bit and then calmly tell them you love each other very much and you'd be delighted if your father gives you away etc (if that's what you want) (You said "parents" in title but only referred to Mum, so not sure of your situation)

    Also, it's a criminal offence to marry under the 18 without your parents' permission. So, hang fire til at least you hit 18.

    Finally, it's considered polite/traditional to write to your CO and inform him/her of your plans to get married, but that can wait til planning is a bit more advanced.

    Best of luck. Marriage is an amazing thing. Enjoy it!

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    (Original post by BLondecroft)
    i am 17 and he is 19. we are both in the military so we don't go home much.
    You can wait a while...
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    Sit her down and explain how you feel about him. Be sure to take it slow in how you progress in telling her you've taken the next step. Not knowing how long you've been with your boyfriend/fiancé could hinder on how she reacts as it might be seen as a hasty move. Did he go about getting parental blessing bcos that might of eased "tensions" as mum might feel con jolted to the acceptance or go the opposite way. Tread carefully and maybe write a letter for back up. Age appropriate I'd say wait till you're old enough as previous posts have suggested..no rush if you feel it's the real deal..sure you can wait a little longer..


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