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Girl said she liked me then changed her mind Watch

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    Said she liked me initially (and told other people this) and there was loads of chemistry, but didn't want a long-distance relationship in another country.
    Anyway we slept together the same night, and she was saying how hot, sexy etc. I was and how much she wanted me...
    We then stayed up talking for several hours... I didn't see her for a month after this but we talked a lot on fb in between. I really had fallen for her and told her this, but that at the same time I totally understood about her not wanting a relationship, but could we be friends.
    She said yeah of course, and we ended up having conversations about a lot of other stuff. However, it then became the case that it was me starting the convos (I tended to start them every few days) and she would reply and be very friendly, but then started to make excuses (I didn't see your msg/my phone is broken so can't write much) I asked her if she preferred to keep a distance given the situation/I'd understand if she didn't wanna be friends etc. and she was like no of course we can. She had agreed to go to the cinema with me ,and then started saying oh i've got no money this month (but then was going out with other people)
    I sort of 'got it' (and plus I still really liked her) so I told her that it was best t okeep a little distance because I still liked her so much and I needed to try and mov eon. She was like yeah it's for the best etc. And we don't really talk now.
    Apparently she's said to my friend that I'm a very nice guy, have loads of great qualities and she likes talking to me but she 'doesn't feel a spark', despite initially telling me she liked me.
    Bearing in mind we've only actually seen each other once in the past month; I was trying to not seem like I was hitting on her or something but she was being very tactile, and didn't try anything but was very touchy-feely, kept teasing me and stuff.
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    Girls always do this, you have to get used to it.

    Just move on, and she'll either cave in and come back, or she would've got what she wanted.
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    But, as I said, aside from this night she never mentioned a single thing to me about her feelings, and I totally understand that this can happen. Just wondering if anyone could give me any feedback? It may be hard to go by from what i've said... my friend reckons it's because I was talking to her too much and she just lost interest/I made the game too easy etc... maybe when we slept together she didn't find it very good... I have no idea, it's just that we clearly really liked each other in the beginning so I'm unsure as how she can say there was no spark? I admit I was quite flirty in the beginning, but after she told me she didn't want anything long-distance, I sort of cooled it down a little... maybe I shouldn't have done? Thanks for any feedback
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    (Original post by ComputerMaths97)
    Girls always do this, you have to get used to it.

    Just move on, and she'll either cave in and come back, or she would've got what she wanted.
    Do you reckon she was just looking for a one-night stand then? I have to admit she did seem to really want to sleep with me that night... she said 'well, you're staying here tonight, we'll see what happens'.. and then that night she was saying I was the best-looking guy ever ,my body was amazing, etc. And then from that day onwards, she totally cooled down. She has made occasionally flirty comments about my looks, and 'liked' pictures of me, but... in any case, iam deffo moving on
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    But, as I said, aside from this night she never mentioned a single thing to me about her feelings, and I totally understand that this can happen. Just wondering if anyone could give me any feedback? It may be hard to go by from what i've said... my friend reckons it's because I was talking to her too much and she just lost interest/I made the game too easy etc... maybe when we slept together she didn't find it very good... I have no idea, it's just that we clearly really liked each other in the beginning so I'm unsure as how she can say there was no spark? I admit I was quite flirty in the beginning, but after she told me she didn't want anything long-distance, I sort of cooled it down a little... maybe I shouldn't have done? Thanks for any feedback
    stop talking with her. you're making yourself too available.

    human nature to want what we cant have

    stop being mr nice guy
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Do you reckon she was just looking for a one-night stand then? I have to admit she did seem to really want to sleep with me that night... she said 'well, you're staying here tonight, we'll see what happens'.. and then that night she was saying I was the best-looking guy ever ,my body was amazing, etc. And then from that day onwards, she totally cooled down. She has made occasionally flirty comments about my looks, and 'liked' pictures of me, but... in any case, iam deffo moving on
    I bet if you show her no attention, even make her jealous (don't go out your way to do this, just saying) then she'd come crawling back. Then you'll see the type of girl she is. Human nature, as said in another post, is to want what you can't have. Make it clear she can't have you
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    (Original post by KyleH123)
    stop talking with her. you're making yourself too available.

    human nature to want what we cant have

    stop being mr nice guy

    That's exactly what my friend said.... it's sad that we have to play these games, but I guess it's like that :s
    We clearly have loads in common, and sometimes I think that maybe I talk to her too much like I would any other friend ,and I needed to up the flirting a bit more... however, I wanted it to look like I 'got the message' about her leaving, and I wasn't trying to try anything else..
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    (Original post by ComputerMaths97)
    I bet if you show her no attention, even make her jealous (don't go out your way to do this, just saying) then she'd come crawling back. Then you'll see the type of girl she is. Human nature, as said in another post, is to want what you can't have. Make it clear she can't have you
    Do you reckon? haha, I don't think i'm very good at doing that sadly! I'm naturally too smiley and if someone shows me a bit of kindess then that's it.. I'm no good at acting distant! :s
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    If she didn't feel a spark or chemistry there's nothing you could have done.
    That is one thing I look for in a person whether there is a connection between us.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Do you reckon? haha, I don't think i'm very good at doing that sadly! I'm naturally too smiley and if someone shows me a bit of kindess then that's it.. I'm no good at acting distant! :s
    That's how every guy is until he realises that some girls play a lot of games, and if you want them type of girls (as they tend to generally be better looking), you have to play the game xD
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    Whats your point/ She liked you but shes changed her mind and you are confused? move on.
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    (Original post by chikane)
    If she didn't feel a spark or chemistry there's nothing you could have done.
    That is one thing I look for in a person whether there is a connection between us.
    Yeah, that's true... it's just that she said in the beginning that there was, ( and there was loads of chemistry between us ) that I'm wondering what I did to make it disappear
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    (Original post by 999tigger)
    Whats your point/ She liked you but shes changed her mind and you are confused? move on.
    I am trying to move on ,I haven't messaged her since I totally understand that this happens, my point is whether there's something glaringly obvious that I might have done that may have been off-putting? It just helps me to know for the future.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    That's exactly what my friend said.... it's sad that we have to play these games, but I guess it's like that :s
    We clearly have loads in common, and sometimes I think that maybe I talk to her too much like I would any other friend ,and I needed to up the flirting a bit more... however, I wanted it to look like I 'got the message' about her leaving, and I wasn't trying to try anything else..
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Do you reckon? haha, I don't think i'm very good at doing that sadly! I'm naturally too smiley and if someone shows me a bit of kindess then that's it.. I'm no good at acting distant! :s
    she ain't for you.
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    yep, guess not
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I am trying to move on ,I haven't messaged her since I totally understand that this happens, my point is whether there's something glaringly obvious that I might have done that may have been off-putting? It just helps me to know for the future.
    Doesnt sound like it. Seems like you are trying to decipher her behaviour as being rational or understandable. Seems like she wants to be friends when it suits her becayse its that nice thing of feeling desired, but really shes not that into you.

    leave her to it and use your energy for something worthwile.
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    she li'd to thou i'm afraid
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    (Original post by 999tigger)
    Doesnt sound like it. Seems like you are trying to decipher her behaviour as being rational or understandable. Seems like she wants to be friends when it suits her becayse its that nice thing of feeling desired, but really shes not that into you.

    leave her to it and use your energy for something worthwile.

    That sounds about right, yeah.... it was just that in the beginning she was going round telling people she liked me, and told me herself... and spent weeks talking to me online, flirting etc. and yeah I guess I thought she was one of the nicest girls i'd ever met, so just really fell for her..
    anyway, I'm finally moving on, I'm not messaging her at all however I am seeing her out this Saturday :s people have advised me to play it totally cool., and not even speak to her unless I have to.. I'm scared I'll just end up being really friendly again..
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    That sounds about right, yeah.... it was just that in the beginning she was going round telling people she liked me, and told me herself... and spent weeks talking to me online, flirting etc. and yeah I guess I thought she was one of the nicest girls i'd ever met, so just really fell for her..
    anyway, I'm finally moving on, I'm not messaging her at all however I am seeing her out this Saturday :s people have advised me to play it totally cool., and not even speak to her unless I have to.. I'm scared I'll just end up being really friendly again..
    Rge rgubf us you are letting yourself be manipulated by her. Hinestly its not going anywhere, she thought you were ok in the beginnning but shes decided there isnt enough iof a spark. Oeioke decide that about people all the time. Its not going anywhere so let it go. There will be other gilrs and ones that wont mess you about and have a genuine interest in you.
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    (Original post by 999tigger)
    Rge rgubf us you are letting yourself be manipulated by her. Hinestly its not going anywhere, she thought you were ok in the beginnning but shes decided there isnt enough iof a spark. Oeioke decide that about people all the time. Its not going anywhere so let it go. There will be other gilrs and ones that wont mess you about and have a genuine interest in you.
    Yeah... you're right! Thanks.. I guess I won't be very cold but I won't go out my way to speak to her kind of thing. I totally get that it happens, it's not really that that offends me, Ithink I'm just sad because in the beginning she was so so lovely and I thought I'd never met a girl as nice as that before, but then afterwards she couldn't even be direct with me about anything despite knowing how I felt.. ah well.
 
 
 
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