i don't know if the wax is deffinitely the problem. about 2 years after the infections started my mother asked the doctor to book an appointment with the ear specialist. he said that would be useless but she persisted (she is 90% deaf and was born like that so she had some obvious worries) and he eventually got us an appointment. they checked my hearing, it was fine. the specialist said i seem to have some dead skin in my ear that gets infected then oozes puss once in a while which causes swellings and pain etc. He said it's pretty hard to heal but he gave me some drops and there never was another appointment with him. mind you , this is like 5 years ago now. the infections last a couple of days and usually by the time i get an appointment with the doctor it's almost healed - maybe that is why he says he see's no infection? although sometimes, the ear that got infected later is still swollen and he says 'yes, this ear has a problem the other is fine'. Sometimes i get to the doctor before the other ear has got the infection, and i tell him 'the other ear may be fine but it's going to get infected soon, i can assure you' and he doesn't believe me. Lo and behold 2 days later the other is infected too. I just can't be bothered to keep visiting the doctor so regularly when he's not even offering me much advice. He did give me anti biotics for one of the infections a few years back, and after that the infections were less regular but still occuring. then a year later they are more regular than ever, and the wax drops don't do much at all. if i leave the infection untreated, it heals in the same amount of time that it does with the wax drops. And the amount of time between the infections is the same with/without the wax drops so i'm not sure if wax is the problem.
We're changing doctors soon anyway so hopefuly they'll be a little more interested... but i was just wondering if my situation is familiar with anyone else!