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How do I stop caring what people think. Watch

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    I want to show bad bt as i get older it is getting worse and worse. I just ru through in my head what they were thinking at a certain time and everything. I have only got 2 hours seep in the past 4 days as I cant switch my mind off.
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    (Original post by illness)
    I want to show bad bt as i get older it is getting worse and worse. I just ru through in my head what they were thinking at a certain time and everything. I have only got 2 hours seep in the past 4 days as I cant switch my mind off.
    I'm making an assumption that you are worried they might be thinking ill of yourself.
    The more you practice a skill, the better you get at it, and the more automatic it becomes. The more you think about people thinking about you, the more natural it will become.

    You haven't had sleep in 4 days, go visit your doctor right away. This is a concern. If you doctor puts you on pills or meds, without providing proper non-medical resources for you to seek help, then they are bad doctors, you should go see another one.
    I also highly suggest visiting a counselor, as getting professional help sooner, rather than later is always good. In the meantime i want you to search up cognitive distortions, what they are, how to fix them, and then practice what you learn. I have attached a picture of cognitive distortions and this link here: https://depts.washington.edu/abrc/st...istortions.pdf
    provides ways to fix some of them. These are the two resources that helped me get started.

    Remember that you have been practicing negative ways of thinking for years, so it will take the some time (maybe even the same amount of time) to get back to healthy ways of thinking. Do not give up, the more knowledge you get (internet, counselor), the more you practice new positive ways of thinking, the more natural healthy thinking will become.

    Good luck!
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    Go and see your GP. self esteem and anxiety issues. honestly I might vale someone elses opinion or respect, but its a limited number. i care more about what i think about myself as im a pretty honest judge. If i pass my own standards then i really care very little what others think and cna live with myself.

    Your worrying about peoples opinions who dont matter and who may not even be thinking anything i.e its all in your head.

    Go and see your GP so they cna help you find a better balance.
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    There's a video by Casey Neistat about this… definitely watch it :hugs:
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    Just stop, that's really it. Most people make superficial judgements, some of them make informed judgements, most people gossip, at the end of the day why does anyone care? Such judgements change more than the changing of underwear. If someone makes them public, defend yourself, otherwise just enjoy life. I used to have bad anxiety, sometimes I slip into it, but now people say i'm bloody arrogant, and they're damn right I am, i'll live how I please.
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    i know it's hard but occupy yourself with other activities. watch TV series, watch youtube, read a book, and when you start overthinking, stop yourself right there and open your eyes to see things for what they're actually are in the moment and not something wild far in the future.
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    Here's a tip: Stop caring.

    It's amazing how few people realise they're in control of their own mind.
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    (Original post by Sammi_K?)
    I'm making an assumption that you are worried they might be thinking ill of yourself.
    The more you practice a skill, the better you get at it, and the more automatic it becomes. The more you think about people thinking about you, the more natural it will become.

    You haven't had sleep in 4 days, go visit your doctor right away. This is a concern. If you doctor puts you on pills or meds, without providing proper non-medical resources for you to seek help, then they are bad doctors, you should go see another one.
    I also highly suggest visiting a counselor, as getting professional help sooner, rather than later is always good. In the meantime i want you to search up cognitive distortions, what they are, how to fix them, and then practice what you learn. I have attached a picture of cognitive distortions and this link here: https://depts.washington.edu/abrc/st...istortions.pdf
    provides ways to fix some of them. These are the two resources that helped me get started.

    Remember that you have been practicing negative ways of thinking for years, so it will take the some time (maybe even the same amount of time) to get back to healthy ways of thinking. Do not give up, the more knowledge you get (internet, counselor), the more you practice new positive ways of thinking, the more natural healthy thinking will become.

    Good luck!
    Yes thats true. I hate this way of thinking. It is soul destroying.
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    (Original post by 999tigger)
    Go and see your GP. self esteem and anxiety issues. honestly I might vale someone elses opinion or respect, but its a limited number. i care more about what i think about myself as im a pretty honest judge. If i pass my own standards then i really care very little what others think and cna live with myself.

    Your worrying about peoples opinions who dont matter and who may not even be thinking anything i.e its all in your head.

    Go and see your GP so they cna help you find a better balance.
    If someone says something bad about me I go over what they said over and over again until I go insane. Infact a few years ago there this **** made fun of me and said his girlfried seen a picture of me and thought I was a proper weirdo and I cant stop thinking about it. This *****can get girls no problem as well as he is a nasty piece of ****. Used to say **** to me all the time and I wish I f****ing punched so hard back then.

    He looks like a ****ing oger as well. Absolute ****.
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    (Original post by whorace)
    Just stop, that's really it. Most people make superficial judgements, some of them make informed judgements, most people gossip, at the end of the day why does anyone care? Such judgements change more than the changing of underwear. If someone makes them public, defend yourself, otherwise just enjoy life. I used to have bad anxiety, sometimes I slip into it, but now people say i'm bloody arrogant, and they're damn right I am, i'll live how I please.
    It should be that easy, it really should I completely agree. This is why I get frustrated even more. Why cant I JUST STOP.
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    (Original post by illness)
    I want to show bad bt as i get older it is getting worse and worse. I just ru through in my head what they were thinking at a certain time and everything. I have only got 2 hours seep in the past 4 days as I cant switch my mind off.
    PM me and I will share my personal experience. PM me and i can then reply to it.
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    (Original post by ComputerMaths97)
    Here's a tip: Stop caring.

    It's amazing how few people realise they're in control of their own mind.
    Exactly something I would have said 5 years ago.
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    (Original post by illness)
    Exactly something I would have said 5 years ago.
    Okay. The way you have phrased is implies sarcasm. What would you like me to say in return?
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    (Original post by ComputerMaths97)
    Okay. The way you have phrased is implies sarcasm. What would you like me to say in return?
    No it was;t saracasm. Just saying it would have been something I would have said in a better mindset but once you get into this mindset it feel impossible to just stop caring.
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    (Original post by illness)
    No it was;t saracasm. Just saying it would have been something I would have said in a better mindset but once you get into this mindset it feel impossible to just stop caring.
    Oh okay I'm sorry I was mistaken.

    To be honest the hardest hurdle for my friend (only reason I'm here is because a very close friend suffered similar problems, thought I could help) was accepting that he cared way too much about what others think. Once that started to kick in, it just got better a lot quicker. So it seems you're already over that hurdle, which is promising. My friend always compared it to smoking (but he didn't smoke lmao). He said it was something he felt almost addicted to, but absolutely hated it, and it's consequences. That's why he started being really unhygenic for a bit (by really, I mean he was having 2 showers a day, brushing his teeth every 5 mins, a new haircut costing like £20 every weekend, insanely expensive clothes etc before the change, so he basically just came to "normal" standards ) and keep going through phases of "giving up" and returning to old ways, then going back. It felt like he was have a mental battle with himself. My advice was to always point out that he was improving. And I always asked, every day, has anyone noticed the change? His answer was always no, in which, skip some time, he first learned that people really do not care/ think about him as much as he thinks they do.

    I know the situation he had may be a bit different to yours, but what I learned from it is that he only improved once he overcome his biggest fear about others' opinions.

    Also, how often do you think about other people/ judge them? Then divide that by how many people you know, then you'll realise how little people, frankly care about the things you worry about Harsh but true.
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    Step One: Stop caring.

    Step Two: Go to the pub.
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    (Original post by illness)
    It should be that easy, it really should I completely agree. This is why I get frustrated even more. Why cant I JUST STOP.
    The easiness depends on a lot of factors.
    Genetics
    The way you were raised
    Life Experiences
    etc.

    For some people it is really easy because they have not experienced what you are going through. I have been through negative thoughts and you can't just turn it off. It doesn't work that way. These thoughts are soo ingrained that you have to challenge them, and change them, and that takes time and effort, but it get's easier each time.

    If I had a dollar for everytime someone told me to stop, I fricking could pay off my student loans.
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    (Original post by ComputerMaths97)
    Okay. The way you have phrased is implies sarcasm. What would you like me to say in return?
    lol people on TSR are always on edge that someone is out to get them.
 
 
 
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