Home broken into...

Hey TSR, Last week someone attempted to break into my house (during daytime). He managed to gain entry but left before taking anything since I must've scared him away. Anyways, done all the police statements, looking at pictures, etc - couldn't find him so case closed.

Except now I have this huge fear of any loud or even muffled sounds around the house, literally to the point that I sort of jump. Problem is, I'm normally alone in the house (until the evening) due to parents business, etc and I can't stop this stupid fear. Its been over a week but I'm still so scared and I can't concentrate on doing my work, watching TV, nothing. I don't really now why I'm posting this - just wanting some comforting words, possibly.

Scroll to see replies

Reply 1

smellielli

I came home once at about 2am. I went upstairs and saw that everything was messed up, with things from my parents room in my room etc. I left the house as soon as I could, and waited for the police. Police said I had probably interrupted them/him/her.

For a while afterwards I was scared pretty much the whole time at home. Even when I was in my bed at night, with other people in the house. Time will help you get over it.

Reply 2

Cloud_Strife

The guy isnt going to come back to the same house, not now that he knows someone is there during the afternoons. I know its tough but try not too worry :smile:

Reply 3

Acaila

Maybe adding new locks or some sort of added security features would reassure you a bit?
Talk to your parents about how you're feeling as well :smile:

And, of course, :hugs:

Reply 4

Dragon24

Aww, sorry you have experienced this. At least you aren't hurt. Make sure all doors are locked but you have a key handy incase of an emergency. The guy may not come back again as he knows someone is in in the daytime. If it happens again call the police straight away. Invite some friends round to study if you don't want to be alone for a while.

Reply 5

nk_angel89

Oooo, such quick replies - My dad fitted all this extra internal locks all around the house on windows, patio doors, etc but I just can't seem to relax, grrrrr!!! I hate feeling like this because then I feel as though the man wins and he shouldn't. I really do hope time does heal this.

Reply 6

Ghost

I'm glad no-one was hurt or anything was taken.
How did he get in? Sounds like he was just an opportunist rookie chancing his arm at some easy loot. The fact that he knows that your house/area is aware of him trying once, and that you'll obviously be more security conscious now, I highly doubt he'd ever come near your house ever again.

EDIT: If that doesn't put you more at ease, maybe consider having some sort of weapon (i.e. a baseball bat) in your bedroom, just to make you feel a little more safe?

Reply 7

frank01277779

I do feel this is a time thing.

Realistically there's no greater chance now that you will be broken into than there was before (and in reality even less chance with the extra locks, etc) so I would think you'll come to this realisation in time.

It's natural for you to react like this though. E.g. one of my friends was mugged the other week walking from mine back to his house - it made me more wary for a bit, just because it can indeed happen to anyone, but you can't go around actually being scared of it happening, it's not healthy, plus like you say, it lets "them" win...

Reply 8

Talya

Ghost

EDIT: If that doesn't put you more at ease, maybe consider having some sort of weapon (i.e. a baseball bat) in your bedroom, just to make you feel a little more safe?

Is that a good idea? Like, the farmer who went to prison for shooting a burglar... could the same happen if you hit a burglar with a bat?

Reply 9

Ghost

Talya

Is that a good idea? Like, the farmer who went to prison for shooting a burglar... could the same happen if you hit a burglar with a bat?

True, but I do still think that farmer was completely in the right, and I'd rather go to jail protecting my home/family than risk the other consequences if the burglar got their way

But anyway, you'd have to intentionally want to kill someone to actually kill them with a bat (i.e. hitting them on the head). If someone broke into my house, I'd just swing at their arms/chest/back until they got out of my house, or could no longer move due to having broken legs, at which point they would go to jail.
I can't see the police having a problem with you giving a burglar a broken arm/leg if they broke into your house.... but I suppose stranger things with UK law HAVE happened.

Reply 10

Holliver!

During freshers week someone climbed in through my bedroom window (with me in the room) and stole my laptop so I completely understand how you're feeling. I was so shaken up after it, I couldn't be in my room by myself and had to get my flatmate to sleep on my floor for a couple of nights. Then I spent all night staying awake and reading, bedroom window closed at all time (complete nightmare as our rooms are so hot). In the end I bought a TV which really helped and for a couple of weeks I slept with it on, so I had the background noise to stop my imagination from going into overdrive and eventually I managed to get back into a pattern. I know how horrible it is so loads of sympathy for you.

I was so shaken I went for a few counselling sessions at uni, just to talk to someone about it. It really helped actually and I felt loads better about being in my room and we talked about giving it a good clean and putting stuff like photos on the windows and stuff and 'reclaiming the space'. It sounds stupid but it did really help. Things still aren't perfect, sometimes I get a bit freaked out if I'm by myself, but I'm loads more aware now and am paranoid at leaving my window wide open, but I guess thats just learning from what happened.

Also, after it happened we were talking to the policeman who told us that it would be fine to have a cricket bat to hand as "I had taken up cricket" or something similar. As long as you use it in self defence (eg not attacking from behind) it's allowed.

I really hope things get better for you soon, I'm sure it will.

Reply 11

nk_angel89

Thanks Holly for that. I have talked to loads of people about this and it does help but you still have that feeling inside of you. Actually this thread has really helped with everyone saying he won't come back, so thanks guys. I have to just sit it out and try to get over it. I think more than anything I'm just tired as sleeping can be a bit of a problem but I'm really trying to relax. The worst thing is that we have so much security in the house and this can happen - all locked windows, locked doors, security alarm, fencing,walls around the house.
At first I think I repressed it a little bit as I couldnt remeber but it keeps coming up now...

Reply 12

Adam83

Cricket bat thing prolly only a good idea if it makes you feel safer.
Might just become constant reminder

Reply 13

Holliver!

It will take a bit of time, but I promise it will get better. I found that finding positives in the situation helped- like I became more independant becuase of it as I had to phone the police and insurance companies myself, and I helped to raise awareness within uni about personal safety as the CCTV footage was used in a uni campaign. The posters were an excellent talking point in the laundry room. The chances of it happening to me in the first place were really slim as loads of other windows in the block were open (my flatmates window had been left wide open- he'd gone out and loced his room so they could've cleared him right out- so in a way I'm glad it was me and I was in my room to scare them off and all they took was a laptop that was insured and was new with nothign on it) and now it has happened, you'll be so more aware of shutting windows and locking doors and stuff that chances of it happening again are quite remote. I'm certain things will get better- just try not to concentrate on the bad.

Reply 14

ch0c0h01ic

Arming yourself would not be a good idea, it shows premeditation to any damage you do which doesn't look very good in court. Yes, Tony Martin(the Norfolk Farmer) was in the right in defending his home in SOME ways. Many people don't realise that he's a little mad, he actually booby trapped his house and was waiting for the burglars to return, so he could deal with them. Like i said, premeditation = prison. As i understand, you are only allowed to use force to remove someone from your property if they don't volunteer to leave. You are also only allowed to use 'reasonable force.' If you stick a kitchen knife in some dude who broke in, who was unarmed, and posed no risk, theres a good chance you will do a stint in prison.

Self defense lessons will go a long way to improving your confidence and opening your eyes to the possibilities of improvised weapons which can be used on impulse, in the heat of the moment, for self defense, which looks a lot nicer in court and is less likely to get you convicted.

You're a lot less likely to get burgled again if you take certain precautions. Good locks on all doors and windows will deter most people, but they only work if you don't leave them open all the time, sure, leave a large window/door open if you are in the room, but don't leave doors and windows open on the other side of the house where you don't know what's going on. A good alarm system is also a good deterrent. Don't leave valuables on show, use net curtains, drawers, cupboards, etc, valuable out of sight are out of mind. Ask you local police station on tips on how to avoid further burglaries. They will have leaflets and some even have advisers which can come out to your house for free and advise you on security and safety.

Reply 15

lucyb-90

when my house was broken into when i was about 9 my parents added extra security. i think it helped them to worry less. :biggrin:

Reply 16

tinkerbellejess

Talya

Is that a good idea? Like, the farmer who went to prison for shooting a burglar... could the same happen if you hit a burglar with a bat?

It was the fact that he shot them as they were running away that put him "in the wrong", although I think he was in the right! If you can't feel safe in your own home, where can you?

Reply 17

TheBellJar

It's a good idea about taking self defence lessons for a way of counselling. The things you pick up really boost your confidence and you'll lose a lot of paranoia.
Just try and relax and focus on the idea that you do have new locks and the chances of that person returning are slim. :smile:

Reply 18

*pink_sapphires*

THANK YOU OP!!!!!!!!! Someone tried to break into my house the other day....ruined our trellis and fence. I am now TERRIFIED and stayed up all night last saturday incase they came back. I have this feeling they want to hurt me and omg, it's horrible. So yeah...thanks OP cos this thread helps me too! :hugs:

Reply 19