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Lying about experience

I've never had a boyfriend, well I admit I wasn't really attractive in my teens and had low self-confidence and went to a girls school so my chances were minimal. I'm at uni now, but am still single. I do want a boyfriend its just the opportunity hasn't really arisen.

I've recently got back into contact with old friends from school and they ask me about my lovelife (which doesn't exist...) so I lied about having a boyfriend, but said the relationship didn't work out. I'm worried they will ask me more and more details and it will be obvious that I've made it up and that I still haven't had a relationship.

What do you suggest I do? I'm too embarassed to admit I've never been kissed but I don't want to make up lies that will come back to me and bite me in the ass! Can you help, I'm distressed :frown:

Reply 1

theredsox

If they ask you questions, you could always say it's too painful to talk about at the moment? They probably won't, though. I wouldn't worry too much.

Reply 2

FunnyMonkey

ok, my advice is definately dont come clean! if i was you i would feel scared too but just keep the details at an absolute minimum.
if they ask, u could say u didnt go out long, 'in fact, it was more like seein each other'. if they ask what u did with him (which they prob wont at their age) just say u kissed cos u werent goin out that long, cos its not really a terrible lie. if they ask what he looked like 'brown hair, brown eyes' covers most guys! they prob wont delve too much, just try and make it out like it wasnt too serious. hope that helps!! x

Reply 3

aieou

okay guys thanks :smile:

now how do i go about getting a boyfriend? any ideas?

Reply 4

PhilMc

I wouldn't have lied in the first place. But saying as you have, just don't tell ANY more.

Lies + Lies + Lies = Eventual Truth will be found out.

And about getting one. There is no answer, or else these forums wouldn't be here for people to moan about it. :p:

Seriously, stop being the one who's always looking for a boyfriend. Be happy and single - get out there. :smile:

Reply 5

*Cheryl*

Well, I'm actually glad I've found some1 just lik me who hasn't found any1 with an interest in them yet or vice versa!

I'd like a boyfriend too (and just lik you for the 1st time...which is embarrassing I no!) but hey thats life...u could just put it down to focussing on your education cos thats kinda true for me (i'm 18 and don't reali have any social life atm or haven't done even from the GCSE's lol) so thats not a lie!

I wud actually come clean to your friends if they ask you tho because:

1. They might actually know someone just for you...most ppl find someone through their friends!
2. If your lik me you will worry yourself sick in case you forget to lie wen your off guard and say something contradicting wot you said the first time!lol
3. You wont b able to b yourself around your friends...always having to lie about this imaginery boyfriend you've told them about

You should then hopefully feel beta in yourself...I hope uni will change me and I will find someone :smile:

lets hope!!!! x

Reply 6

HereFishyFishy

Well, it's only a little lie. I wouldn't worry too much. If they ask questions just do the 'mysterious-too-painful' thing. Or alternatively come up with some basics to cover your back. They can't prove anything so don't worry.

Reply 7

General Mullet

As someone else said, you don't want to talk about him. No need to lie further or face the embarrassment of owning up. Don't let it bog you down.

Reply 8

aieou

I think I'm mostly worried because my friends are quite hot and get loads of male attention and seem really experienced.

Also, they are the type that DO ask everything. They don't care they ask really personal questions! Its what most girls are like I think (though not me!) I wish they weren't so invasive!!!!

But if I avoid or skirt around the questions it looks like I'm uncomfortable/insecure and probably speaking louder than words!!!!

Reply 9

coldfusion

I'm a guy and I have no "love-life" and being in an all boys school doesn't help but i'm ok with it. Everyone knows i'm that kind of guy and they seem to accept it all right so I'm not ashamed by it in any way. All that might change when i get to uni though...I'd lose the excuse of no female interaction opportunity.

Reply 10

shona

If anyone brings it up, just say that it was a difficult break up and you really don't want to talk about because it's a chapter in your life that's closed. Your friends will understand.

With regards to getting a boyfriend... I don't think it's as simple as one day deciding, "Hmm, I'd quite like to get me a man!" and finding one.

I suppose the more activities you're involved in, and thus the more people you meet, the greater the chance you have of meeting someone who you get on with and with whom there might be a possibility for something more than just friends. Wouldn't recommend trying your luck with random guys in bars/clubs.

No, definitely stick with just trying to meet new people and see what happens. In my experience, if you're actively looking for a boyfriend, you tend to get frustrated. Possibly because if you're not actively looking for love, you're more relaxed and you seem more like yourself.

And who cares if your friends are "experienced"? For a start, they might be lying, and secondly, any decent boy worth going out with would be honoured you waited for the right guy to come along and that guy was him. Being inexperienced can be a very attractive quality as long as you're willing to experiment and explore new things.

Reply 11

r0manticide17

So you lied about having a boyfriend. Big deal! To be honest, I really wouldn't worry about it at all, it really isnt the be all and end all. If they do ask you questions, do what the people above have said. it isnt such a big lie that you'll be found out, because, to be honest, who can prove it?!

For the wanting a boyf bit : Get yourself out there!

Reply 12

wombley

*raises hand* in the "don't have a boyfriend. have never had a boyfriend. would quite like a boyfriend" category as well. figured i'd come and lurk... :p:

Reply 13

AllergicToFairydust

Having recently suffered a break up, I can honestly say if you reply "I don't wish to talk about it" when asked then the other person will leave it drop.

Reply 14

ßlαcksωαn

Don't lie. But the lie has been told now, so you have to keep on lying buddy.

Reply 15

Louise88

Let's be honest, you could have lied about something far worse. I wouldn't feel too bad, you would be surprised by the amount of people that lie about experience.

Okay so you've lied, who hasn't? Just don't do it again. If anyone asks you about it, tell them that you don't want to speak about it and they'll leave you alone. Don't tell anymore, don't even tell lies to cover your last one. Just drop the subject if it's brought up.

Don't be embarrassed about your lack of experience, there's no reason to lie about it. If other people don't like it, so what? It's none of their business. It'll happen when it happens. Oh and don't let others, or yourself make you think that you are the only person in the world who has lied about experience. Lot's of people do it, more than you would think. Just don't do it again, there's no point in lying and getting yourself worked up about it.

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