One of my best friends is getting married in July about 3 hours' down south from where we live, in a very nice venue. Because of the distance, I've no choice but to stay over. We'll need to arrive on the Friday night, the wedding is Saturday morning, and we will be leaving Sunday night. My friend and her fiance have announced that this will be at a cost of £120 pounds per person.
Myself and 3 other friends are bridesmaids. We initially said that we would buy our own dresses, but my friend said she'd choose the dress for us and that she'd be paying for them all.
She chose a dress which costed £150 each, and it's not my favourite dress but at the end of the day I'm only wearing it for one day and the main thing is that she's happy so I'm not too bothered. She's now asked me and the others to pay for our own bridesmaid dresses as money's a little tighter than she thought.
I admit I'm a bit put out by this; it wasn't us who chose £150 dresses, and the fact is that we're already paying to stay there 2 nights. Combined with the cost of the wedding present, transport etc. we're talking £300 each.
I don't want to come across as stingy or anything, but I just feel that it's out of order expecting us to pay that much money, especially as i'm a student too and don't really have that kind of money.
However, I really don't want to miss the wedding, and I have no choice but to stay over because it's so far. The main issue for me is the dress. Should I talk to my friend about it? Do you think she's being unreasonable or am I?
i just could not dream of expecting my guests to spend £300 each for my wedding..
Does this sound fair? Friend's wedding Watch
- Thread Starter
- 18-03-2016 21:32
Offline20ReputationRep:TSR Support Team
- TSR Support Team
- 18-03-2016 21:46
I've never heard of bridesmaids paying for their dresses but I suppose each wedding is different. My mum paid for mine as I'll be her bridesmaid next month and when I offered to pay she said don't be silly and it wasn't my place. I would be a bit miffed too, especially if you were told for a while that you didn't have to pay for the dress. I do understand plans change and weddings are expensive but being a student too, I know all too well how tight money is for students and the dress plus your travel, wedding gift and other expenses for the day will be a lot of money. If you really can't afford it then talk to your friend and see if she is really that desperate for the money towards the dress or if any kind of deal can be made, maybe if she realises how tight the money would be for you, she will only ask you to pay half or something. Definitely speak to your friend, if you are close or best friends then you should feel comfortable enough to talk about anything but I definitely don't think you are wrong to feel a bit annoyed.