Turn on thread page Beta
    • #1
    • Thread Starter

    My boyfriend of 2 and a half years has recently been saying he wants to break up. We've had an amazing relationship, always communicated about problems and talked things through. There's been no real problems. We're long distance at uni but have managed to make it work for over a year. Things were tougher the past term as he had a part time job too. He quit that so he could have more time and because he didn't want it to come between us.

    But now he wants to end it. He says he can't explain other than he feels he just can't make himself do this any more, he can't make himself try. We've had several long emotional talks about us and he's said he does still love me and he really believed that we were something special and things felt different with us. He keep saying he doesn't want to mess me around and that he's not worth this and I should move on. Yet after our long emotional chats we still spend time together, be happy together, cuddle, kiss, as if nothing has happened. But he always comes back to this mental block of not being able to be in a relationship right now. A block he feels he has to work through.

    I can see that he isn't in a place to be in a relationship right now but my gut instinct tells me this isn't the end of our story. I know I need to give him time and space to work things out but I'm finding that so hard. I truly believe he isn't messing me around and he is just as confused as me. I want to be able to help him but I don't know how. I know I shouldn't put my life on hold for him but I can't bring myself to give up on us yet when I can feel that there is still so much love and emotion between us.

    Am I wasting my time and clinging on to a memory of us?
    • Very Important Poster

    Very Important Poster
    For a successful relationship it has to work for both. Its not working for him.

    Life can often be about timing. Give him some space, let him sort it out and get on with your own life. he cna make his own mind up.
    Imo he finds the ldr too much stress and hed rather be single whilst at uni. This is very common. He could have or would prefer to meet someone he cna be with whilst at uni rather than feeling restricted or he may just be oing through a difficult time.

    You should cut all contact for at least 6 months and id say a year becayse emailing or texting every day asking how they are etc is not a proper split. It would be suffocating. Hard I know, but you should wnat the best for him and give him space. If you split on ood terms ot leaves it open for you to resume contact in the future.

    Sometimes by letting go gives you the best chance of being friends and reviving it at a later date. It might seem hard to fathom at the moment but theres every chance you cna find someone better or different, who is more suited.
Submit reply
Turn on thread page Beta
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: March 19, 2016


students online now


Exam discussions

Find your exam discussion here

Should predicted grades be removed from the uni application process

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Write a reply...
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.