The Student Room Group

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Reply 1

Awww, just tell him that you are a virgin and tell him that you feel insecure. If he cares about you then he wont mind at all and will talk with you to help reduce your insecurity

Reply 2

Great, what would you like us to do? Is that a statement, or part of a larger question?

Reply 3

I really doubt he will mind, just bring it up next time you get around to discussing sex

Reply 4

It's really nothing to worry about, just tell him and be done with it. I was really insecure about that when I first started going out with mine, I was 16 then and he was 19, so obviously I assumed that he'd already been there, done that. Eventually managed to pluck up the courage to ask him if he'd ever 'done it', and was astounded to get the answer, 'no'. Turned out he was insecure about exactly the same thing-that I might have done it, and he hadn't yet, and thus he wouldn't know what to do/might not be as good. Don't worry about it, just DON'T pretend you have. Worst thing you can do.

Reply 5

He shouldn't care if you are or if you are not. And if he does he is a total ****wit. You should feel secure enough to tell him.

Reply 6

blackswan
He shouldn't care if you are or if you are not. And if he does he is a total ****wit. You should feel secure enough to tell him.


Hmmm. Because it's that simple.... :s-smilie:

Meep!
t's really nothing to worry about, just tell him and be done with it. I was really insecure about that when I first started going out with mine, I was 16 then and he was 19, so obviously I assumed that he'd already been there, done that. Eventually managed to pluck up the courage to ask him if he'd ever 'done it', and was astounded to get the answer, 'no'. Turned out he was insecure about exactly the same thing-that I might have done it, and he hadn't yet, and thus he wouldn't know what to do/might not be as good.


...That is the reason why it isn't simple.

Reply 7

I honestly can't imagine why a guy would care if the girl was a virgin. Not in a relationship anyway, a one night stand with a virgin might not be that great for a variety of reasons.

Reply 8

Psyk
I honestly can't imagine why a guy would care if the girl was a virgin. Not in a relationship anyway, a one night stand with a virgin might not be that great for a variety of reasons.


one of my ex bf's, to whom i lost my virginity, always told me that he hated that i was a virgin before him because it meant i couldn't 'teach him anything new' :rolleyes:.

after i got a fair bit of experience under my belt (ha ha) i haven't had any insecurities like i did with him going into any other relationships.

not that i'm trying to scare the op, just saying that unfortunately all guys don't think the same way that you do.

Reply 9

I'd tell him, personally. Although I didn't know my boyfriend was a virgin before me until a few weeks after we had sex, haha. It shouldn't bother him or make any difference. It's not like he even needs to know, tbh. Obviously my boyfriend not mentioning it to me hasn't made any difference :P

Reply 10

AerisYuna
I've got a really big insecurity. I am a virgin but I haven't told my boyfriend yet.


some guys like that.

Reply 11

sufiankane
some guys like that.


I can understand a guy not being bothered, but why would they like it? Apart from being some kind of virgin-fetish freak, of course. It's not exactly a barrel of laughs, but its something you'd probably be willing to work through if you liked the girl. So why would a guy 'like' it?

Reply 12

3232
I can understand a guy not being bothered, but why would they like it? Apart from being some kind of virgin-fetish freak, of course. It's not exactly a barrel of laughs, but its something you'd probably be willing to work through if you liked the girl. So why would a guy 'like' it?


It's basically the 21st century version of exploring and colonising a new continent.

Reply 13

sufiankane
some guys like that.


That's true. It's why my last relationship broke down. I was too scared of being crap and didn't want to lose her because I really cared about her.
So I couldn't go through with it. And we broke up because of it anyway. :frown:

Reply 14

3232
I can understand a guy not being bothered, but why would they like it? Apart from being some kind of virgin-fetish freak, of course. It's not exactly a barrel of laughs, but its something you'd probably be willing to work through if you liked the girl. So why would a guy 'like' it?


Because the girl has nothing to compare it to so it does matter if he is amazing.

Reply 15

Lib North
It's basically the 21st century version of exploring and colonising a new continent.


Really? I thought it was more like the sexual equivalent of buying a desk from IKEA. All you want is a desk, but you've gotta spend ****ing ages setting the thing up first. It'd be easier just to get one thats already built.

Reply 16

Ozy
Because the girl has nothing to compare it to so it does matter if he is amazing.


Bad sex is bad sex, whether she's got nothing to compare it to or not. If you seriously can't work out how to have sex with someone, then having sex with a virgin is not going to solve your problems, is it?

Reply 17

I suppose some guys might like it if them and their mates have a tally going on how many girls they have umm "deflowered"? Also, I suppose it could mean that if they're really bad the girl might just think that's what it's meant to be like. Then other guys might like it that she couldnt have picked up any bad habits with other guys - or is that learning to drive on your own then trying to pass the test hmmm...

Reply 18

I thought some guys might like it because they know they will be the first man to sleep with the woman. Massaging the ego and all that?

Reply 19

Ginger_Rogers
I thought some guys might like it because they know they will be the first man to sleep with the woman. Massaging the ego and all that?


Yeah i covered them under the title of 'virgin-fetish freaks'. Guys like that are seriously sad.