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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Mind if i ask why?
    It's clear to see. It sounds like she's using you. She doesn't care for how her comments are affecting you, she's quite happy to try and reel you back in like nothing ever happened, and the truth about what happened before is still a mystery to you.

    She's not stable and I can only see this ending painfully.
    • #3
    #3

    This thread is helping me a lot. I'm currently deliberating what I should do as I'm in a very similar situation.

    My boyfriend, throughout the duration of our almost year-long relationship, has broken up with me countless times only to turn up on my doorstep again or just simply not acknowledge that he ever said things were over. This is in addition to a lot of abusive and aggressive behaviour which I only describe as being characteristic of borderline/narcissistic personality disorder i.e. seeing himself as perfect and being severely wounded and angry when I suggest he's made a mistake in anything he does, criticising me constantly and correcting how I speak and do everything combined with elements of OCD-esque behaviour. On my birthday a while back he got obscenely drunk and even begged me to break up with him (which he has done before) because he couldn't bare it any more but when I tried to discuss it with him the next day he wanted to pretend it never happened.

    Taking to a friend about it recently has really helped but what has kept me with him is an inability of mine to blame him for how he treats me because I don't see him as evil just the condition as making him do these evil things. But then talking to my friend I realised that, although I've asked him many times to get help, he has always refused it and gets angry that I even suggest he is flawed and needs counselling or CBT.

    My thinking is the following: Assuming that he was 100% NOT responsible for his violent and childish behaviour in the past - he IS responsible for refusing to seek help when he (sometimes) acknowledges that he's not in control of his moods. But, then again, I'm not sure to what extent his condition actually prevents him from seeking help for the very thing that's causing so many problems... this is my dilemma...

    Any help, support or advice would be hugely appreciated because I'm keen to make a decision about whether I should do this any more...
    • #3
    #3

    For anyone who read the above post and could relate it might be useful for you to know that I approached my boyfriend about getting help and gave him an ultimatum. He didn't even acknowledge that I was asking him to help himself and when I told him I could see a future for us if he refused to even try and get help he simply said: "so it's settled then - we're done". When he ignored the mere suggestion that he need help I knew it was time I told him it was over. He is now my ex-boyfriend.
    • #3
    #3

    For anyone who read the above post and could relate it might be useful for you to know that I approached my boyfriend about getting help and gave him an ultimatum. He didn't even acknowledge that I was asking him to help himself and when I told him I couldn't see a future for us if he refused to even try and get help he simply said: "so it's settled then - we're done". When he ignored the mere suggestion that he needed help I knew it was time to tell him it was over. He is now my ex-boyfriend.
 
 
 
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