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As a guy - Mutual love is a lot harder to find than casual sex. watch

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    #1

    Personally since around 20 I never had a problem in nightclubs and going with girls for casual flings.

    But my actual love life (relationships/emotional side) has been an absolute trainwreck. I have never actually been in a relationship before. I have developed feelings for girls I have slept with but they did not like me that way, or I blew my chance.

    What happens is that I tend to pull girls on nights out, but I am not really interested in them because I don't really know them as people.

    The girls I have wanted since 16 for a relationship... without fail, every single time they go with someone else I know. I look at the guys and they're not better than me... but they do seem like they had the right luck or the set of circumstances. I cannot really explain it.
    It has gotten to the point now where ALL of my friends have long term partners and I am focusing on money making because that is all I have. It's the only thing stopping me from going into deep depression (I've been there before, for a span of months and it is god awful).

    I basically make my money, I go on holiday, then I get really uninhibited and act like a ****. Behind that, I actually feel very ****ing blank, like empty and pointless.


    Is anyone in a similar sort of boat?
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    "The girls I have wanted since 16 for a relationship... without fail, every single time they go with someone else I know. I look at the guys and they're not better than me... but they do seem like they had the right luck or the set of circumstances. I cannot really explain it. "

    On reflection, this is ********. The girls probably had their own preferences and I was blinded by my feelings for them. In hindsight I should have just walked away and never even gave them the time of the day. But to be honest, I have got a lot better at just deleting people from my life. I guess a lot of that anger comes to explain why at 24 I am financially comfortable, it's the only real way I have felt empowered. Sleeping with randoms proves nothing.
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    Have you tried hanging around in libraries and book shops rather than night clubs? Try the romance section.
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    (Original post by mscaffrey)
    Have you tried hanging around in libraries and book shops rather than night clubs? Try the romance section.
    No, not really. Funnily enough, girls in my area don't really go to libraries.
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    (Original post by mscaffrey)
    Have you tried hanging around in libraries and book shops rather than night clubs? Try the romance section.
    Good idea. Approach them in the romance section and ask if they 'are looking for something' and then do a filthy wink.
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    The more men a woman sleeps with, the less she is capable of true love.

    Any more than 1 before you and your odds are unfavourable.

    Google number of partners divorce risk teachman.
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    "filthy wink" never known to fail.
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    try online dating?
    • #2
    #2

    'Mutual love is a lot harder to find than casual sex' I thought this was always the case. Maybe I am wrong.
    To be honest with you, many are looking for real love too so you're not the only person experiencing this feeling. Just remain positive that one day you will find that special someone and that person will love you whole heartedly.
    I've never been fond of casual sex, never engaged it and never will. Me personally, no offence however I don't really understand how people have sex without loving the person they are having sex with. This is just my opinion. I've always viewed sex as very intimate. But getting back to the point- you're still very young with years ahead of you. Love has no time, when it's meant to be it will happen x
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    (Original post by 41b)
    The more men a woman sleeps with, the less she is capable of true love.

    Any more than 1 before you and your odds are unfavourable.

    Google number of partners divorce risk teachman.
    So does this study prove this for both genders? Because if I remember clearly OP is male.
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    (Original post by whorace)
    Good idea. Approach them in the romance section and ask if they 'are looking for something' and then do a filthy wink.
    It's worked on me before now.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    So does this study prove this for both genders? Because if I remember clearly OP is male.
    It is true for both genders but a loose woman has a 25% chance of marriage success and iirc a lothario has a 60% chance of marriage success.
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    Thinking about it logically, what are the chances of two people developing feelings at the same time? It is not really likely. One will always like the other more than the other even if a relationship is established.
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    (Original post by 41b)
    The more men a woman sleeps with, the less she is capable of true love.

    Any more than 1 before you and your odds are unfavourable.

    Google number of partners divorce risk teachman.
    As a male ... I would say same for men tbh.
    I look down on men who sleep around too
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    #2

    (Original post by Bealzibub)
    As a male ... I would say same for men tbh.
    I look down on men who sleep around too
    Really? Shocked me a little.
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    #3

    People in clubs are there looking for one night stands, not relationships. If you were serious about finding a partner, you would stop clubbing and spend that time looking to meet girls in a normal place like at university, at a friend's house party, at a wedding, even online like on Twitter.
 
 
 
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