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    (Original post by supercrazy)
    Tbh suck it up. Go eat ice-cream or something. There are plenty of girls the will love/like you.

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    I've tried that for the past 4 weeks. 0 help. I just cannot move forward.

    (Original post by chikane)
    I had gifts from a friend who i cared about she made me little origami and when she left work she didn't keep in contact with me so i threw all her gifts in the bin so i wouldn't be reminded of her and this has helped i know you won't do this as you want to cling onto her but if you do it will help you move on.
    I won't throw it away but I will just put it somewhere out of reach so I cannot look at it easily.

    (Original post by GoodScran)
    Man up
    That doesn't help.
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    (Original post by believeteam22)



    That doesn't help.
    Well then there's nothing you can do. Either be a man about it or just cry.
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    I've said this before. From a practical point of view you really need to get the wheels in motion and start looking for a job. Or at least start thinking about which direction you're heading in. No one likes an unemployed graduate. If you leave it too late you could be sat at home for the next 6 months with nothing to do except whimper on here about this girl.

    A new job equates to a fresh start and a chance to reinvent yourself amongst a new crowd of people.

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    (Original post by believeteam22)
    I've tried that for the past 4 weeks. 0 help. I just cannot move forward.



    I won't throw it away but I will just put it somewhere out of reach so I cannot look at it easily.



    That doesn't help.
    If you don't get rid of them and you know you still have them you won't move on. If you want to move on, throw them away. But you won't, you'll keep them so you can reminisce about the good times and obsess over what went wrong. It's over, you need to get rid of them.
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    Did you ever get in to the club scene? That would be the perfect antidote to the lifestyle you are experiencing now; no emotional attachment just lots of nice flesh on display. If you combine that with the gym you might find that the alpha lifestyle draws you away from that state of emotional dependency.
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    (Original post by frozen_fire)
    I've said this before. From a practical point of view you really need to get the wheels in motion and start looking for a job. Or at least start thinking about which direction you're heading in. No one likes an unemployed graduate. If you leave it too late you could be sat at home for the next 6 months with nothing to do except whimper on here about this girl.

    A new job equates to a fresh start and a chance to reinvent yourself amongst a new crowd of people.

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    I can't yet because I am bogged down in uni work. I have less than 4 weeks to get everything done and submitted. I am already so behind due to a terrible last month. I have hardly been able to do any work. I cannot concentrate, I am struggling.

    I am already doubly stressed, first because of this girl, and second because of all the work I need to do.

    I will look for jobs not I can't just yet.
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    (Original post by georgiaswift)
    If you don't get rid of them and you know you still have them you won't move on. If you want to move on, throw them away. But you won't, you'll keep them so you can reminisce about the good times and obsess over what went wrong. It's over, you need to get rid of them.
    Maybe, I know I will eventually delete them, but not just yet. I miss her so much. Why do I miss a girl who doesn't give a **** about me? How messed up is that?
    What exactly is wrong with me? How can 1 girl ruin my life? I really don't understand.
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    (Original post by Global Shahada)
    Did you ever get in to the club scene? That would be the perfect antidote to the lifestyle you are experiencing now; no emotional attachment just lots of nice flesh on display. If you combine that with the gym you might find that the alpha lifestyle draws you away from that state of emotional dependency.
    Not really. Even gym I have neglected for the last few months due to uni. And also I have lost all my motivation. It's like I have hit rock bottom and I am not able to pick myself up. Not yet anyway.
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    (Original post by GoodScran)
    Well then there's nothing you can do. Either be a man about it or just cry.
    It's not that simple. It really isn't.
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    (Original post by believeteam22)
    Not really. Even gym I have neglected for the last few months due to uni. And also I have lost all my motivation. It's like I have hit rock bottom and I am not able to pick myself up. Not yet anyway.
    This is absolutely the best solution to your current woes. A more testosterone fuelled environment is really gonna help you avoid the cycle of dependency. I found it helped me to go to a lot of these underground house club nights, honestly the amount of mixed race goer girls at some of these events certainly put paid to any of that beta boy romantic/dependency *******s.
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    just saying telling the OP to "man up" really isn't going to cut it as he clearly needs some form of medical help...my two cents OP are simple,follow the advice given by your GP and doctor and flag up any concerns to them instead of here...
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    (Original post by believeteam22)
    Maybe, I know I will eventually delete them, but not just yet. I miss her so much. Why do I miss a girl who doesn't give a sh*t about me? How messed up is that?
    What exactly is wrong with me? How can 1 girl ruin my life? I really don't understand.
    It's because you've let it become an obsession. If you'd cut her out back when we all said it two years ago you wouldn't be in this mess. It's because you let her stay in your life, and slowly she took it over (possibly indicating an obsessive personality on your part) and now it's been so long it's all you know. If you try your hardest to move on then we'll all support you (as you've seen in the past. But when you refuse and just obsess over everything then it is frustrating and it makes people not want to help you.
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    OP,

    As many others have said (Georgiaswift, Chikane, etc.), you will NOT be able to move on as long as you are tied to or possess anything that reminds her in any way (photos, text conversations, souvenirs of sorts).

    That is the first step. Maybe therapy will prove to be beneficial, but be honest with yourself - can you seriously believe you will forget her/move on if you still have direct access to memories of her in anyway? Granted, most people would have moved on by now but quite clearly from the plethora of threads you've created, the thousands of posts you've written, you are in a particularly damaged state. Clearly, you need to be tough with yourself in a step-by-step approach as the problem is too overwhelmingly large to tackle in one go. That's OK.

    So as I said, make sure that you get rid of all that could make you think of her in the near future. Progressively: whatever is less painful (texts?) until you get rid of pictures and ultimately the whole lot. Until you have done so, stop mentioning "what can I do??" "Why am I so hurt" - if it helps, make a post for everything that gets deleted and accelerates the healing process.

    The next step is a mixture of self-meliorative thinking/meditation whilst also attempting to think of her in a negative light. Eg "I am so much better without her" " I managed to have sex with an attractive girl the other day; I'm sure other attractive girls would also want to" as well as "she wasn't the right girl for me anyway" "there's so many better girls I could spend time with, love and possibly build a future with. Constantly thinking about this and repeating these to yourself - out loud as well at the beginning - will help create a more positive mindframe whilst slowly distancing her from the picture.

    Thirdly, other girls will come! By being more receptive towards meeting other people and being more self-confident, new girls will naturally be attracted towards you as long as you get yourself out there.

    Finally, don't forget to revise! Your grades are your future, and especially being so close to the end you really got to give your very best. Concentrate on these first two steps as well for the next month of course since it well postively help your mental state but make sure you put in the academic effort too.

    As many others have said, it's also a possibility that you are a troll. I don't really care to be honest. Even if you were, at least I may have helped someone else crying for help and being in a cyclically self-destructive pattern.
    In all honesty I wish you were a troll, but I don't belive you are and I hope that my 2 cents as long as all the other helpful posters may help you open your eyes and do the right thing to move on.

    Good luck


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    (Original post by georgiaswift)
    It's because you've let it become an obsession. If you'd cut her out back when we all said it two years ago you wouldn't be in this mess. It's because you let her stay in your life, and slowly she took it over (possibly indicating an obsessive personality on your part) and now it's been so long it's all you know. If you try your hardest to move on then we'll all support you (as you've seen in the past. But when you refuse and just obsess over everything then it is frustrating and it makes people not want to help you.
    Maybe. Being with her was just too good to pass down. I can't the past but going forward I can make better choices. Now she is out of my life. And I have had a lot of time to think of everything. And I wish I had another chance to make things right but I can't.

    I am trying to move on. I don't want to ruin my grades and regret it for life. I have slowly deleted things about her from my phone. Notes, messages, just a couple of pictures where I have hidden away which I might delete soon. Then there will be nothing left of which reminds me of her except memories.

    But even now, I have this emptiness feeling inside me, I have tears in my eyes, I feel worried and anxious, I miss her, it hurts that we will never talk again and she has moved on and so easily forgot about me. I mean it just really hurts. I cannot stress this enough, it really has left me in pieces.

    Next week I will contact the counselling place and go with that and see how that goes.

    But there is no quick fix here. I miss her every single day.
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    (Original post by scrawlx101)
    just saying telling the OP to "man up" really isn't going to cut it as he clearly needs some form of medical help...my two cents OP are simple,follow the advice given by your GP and doctor and flag up any concerns to them instead of here...
    I will. They suggested counselling which I'm gonna try. They even said they can give me some medicine for the anxiety if I wanted. I am considering it.
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    (Original post by Metrododo)
    OP,

    As many others have said (Georgiaswift, Chikane, etc.), you will NOT be able to move on as long as you are tied to or possess anything that reminds her in any way (photos, text conversations, souvenirs of sorts).

    That is the first step. Maybe therapy will prove to be beneficial, but be honest with yourself - can you seriously believe you will forget her/move on if you still have direct access to memories of her in anyway? Granted, most people would have moved on by now but quite clearly from the plethora of threads you've created, the thousands of posts you've written, you are in a particularly damaged state. Clearly, you need to be tough with yourself in a step-by-step approach as the problem is too overwhelmingly large to tackle in one go. That's OK.

    So as I said, make sure that you get rid of all that could make you think of her in the near future. Progressively: whatever is less painful (texts?) until you get rid of pictures and ultimately the whole lot. Until you have done so, stop mentioning "what can I do??" "Why am I so hurt" - if it helps, make a post for everything that gets deleted and accelerates the healing process.

    The next step is a mixture of self-meliorative thinking/meditation whilst also attempting to think of her in a negative light. Eg "I am so much better without her" " I managed to have sex with an attractive girl the other day; I'm sure other attractive girls would also want to" as well as "she wasn't the right girl for me anyway" "there's so many better girls I could spend time with, love and possibly build a future with. Constantly thinking about this and repeating these to yourself - out loud as well at the beginning - will help create a more positive mindframe whilst slowly distancing her from the picture.

    Thirdly, other girls will come! By being more receptive towards meeting other people and being more self-confident, new girls will naturally be attracted towards you as long as you get yourself out there.

    Finally, don't forget to revise! Your grades are your future, and especially being so close to the end you really got to give your very best. Concentrate on these first two steps as well for the next month of course since it well postively help your mental state but make sure you put in the academic effort too.

    As many others have said, it's also a possibility that you are a troll. I don't really care to be honest. Even if you were, at least I may have helped someone else crying for help and being in a cyclically self-destructive pattern.
    In all honesty I wish you were a troll, but I don't belive you are and I hope that my 2 cents as long as all the other helpful posters may help you open your eyes and do the right thing to move on.

    Good luck


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    Very good advice, if i knew it was over between me and someone i would delete everything and throw away any gifts so i won't be reminded of them.
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    (Original post by chikane)
    Very good advice, if i knew it was over between me and someone i would delete everything and throw away any gifts so i won't be reminded of them.
    Yeah that's what I did with my first ex gf last year. Were together for 2 years but keeping stuff was too painful so after a month I forced myself to delete all our pics (like our friend OP) no better way to start moving on!


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    Eat a snickers
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    (Original post by Metrododo)
    Yeah that's what I did with my first ex gf last year. Were together for 2 years but keeping stuff was too painful so after a month I forced myself to delete all our pics (like our friend OP) no better way to start moving on!

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    I have pretty much deleted everything now. I can't delete my memories though. I feel awful.
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    Just some updates.

    I am having a lot of anxiety throughout the day. When I go out I feel on edge, nervous, panicky. At night it gets very bad and I cannot keep still, I find it very difficult to sleep.

    I spoke to my GP who said she will prescribe me some medicine to help me calm down.

    I'm still waiting for the counselling.

    This is affecting my ability to do my work and I have less than 3 weeks left. What can I do?

    I feel think I am suffering from depression and anxiety now.
 
 
 
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