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Help, should I stay with him watch

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    My BF and I met while in uni (he is 23 now), but he eventually dropped out and started working as a carpenter. I'm Asian , and he's white. We generally thinks somewhat differently, but lately it has been taking a toll on my feelings towards him and I don't know what to do.He is currently making minimum wage and works about 25 hours a week on average. he's still living with his parents. He insisted that the wage is more than fair and he can survive on that salary even if his parents kick him out of the house. I do not believe that's true. I'm in professional school and will have a job that pays 60k a year lined up by big city in 2 years. I want to move to a bigger city to advance my career and he thinks that's unnecessary.He does not believe in women's struggle. For instance, after the whole #freeKe$ha blew up on social media, he said she was the one being dumb because she could have easily still be making music during the 3 years, and then she can release her music all at once after her contract is up, meaning no damage would be done. I tried to explain to him it doesn't work that way for a pop singer's career. But he started calling me names and that I didn't understand anything, and that Ke$ha probably just wants a big chunk of money for her probably not true rape allegation. I just shook my head because I don't really want to argue anymore. (Btw, I was raped as a girl, he knew this, yet still believed firmly in the fact that most rape victims are liars, but that's a different long story for another time)He doesn't know the difference between ethnicity and nationality, or refuses to. I'm Vietnamese British, but he insisted that I'm "asian" therefore can never be considered "British". His step dad is a 3rd generation Pakistani who doesn't speak a lick of Urdu, but he calls his step dad "Paki" and not British. My family are immigrants, which he said "you lots came here to steal British jobs and that's *******s", which is very hurtful to me.He constantly complains about other people being "dumb", which as they say, if you're the smartest person in the room, it's probably not the case. I'm just leaving it that way. His brother, who moved out at the age of 18, worked full time, went to uni full time, got married and had 2 kids before the age of 23. Then landed an engineering job that paid 50k a year, is apparently "irresponsible" in his eyes. He makes fun of me for being a lame "nerd" all the time, which I think is ironic because... Well, nerds make good money?I don't know what should I do with my relationship...Tl;dr my BF thinks about things a lot differently than I do. I love him a lot. But what to do?
    • #2
    #2

    Honestly? You should drop his ass.
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    In short - No. He sounds like an insensitive, racist jerk. Dump him. You're worth more than that.
    • #3
    #3

    Your boyfriend is obviously a racist and I don't understand why you're with him... he doesn't even have a proper job or any ambitions. You can do a lot better that some broke racist. And you wouldn't want to take home someone like that anyway would you?
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    What exactly is it you love about this guy?
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    No I wouldn't stay with him.
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    Lmao he's a grade A rustler and you're an idiot for still being with him, not much more to be said.
    • #4
    #4

    I would advise you to leave him before your feelings for him make it hard on you to do that. Not only he is a racist, but has no respect for you calling you names. Him dropping out of university shows he is not at at all driven in life, while you are highly educated. This will be a major problem in your relationship, because men don't usually like it when a woman is in a higher position than them.
    I know it is hard for you to leave him, but you have to do this for yourself and for your family. He will not understand your Asian culture, with your parents being from another country and it will bring sorrow to them to see you end up with a scum who hates immigrants. He will not change, it will only get worse.
    You have a wonderful life a head of you, and great opportunities to meet new people. There is no time to waste. As soon as you get rid of him, you will notice other beautiful people around you. You just have to leave him, and I am sure you ll have the support of your family and loved ones.
    Wish you all the best
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    Do yourself a favour and dump his ass, he doesn't sound like a very nice person to be around.
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    Dump his ass.
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    Does he have some sort of magical ****? How the hell have u kept with him after all that. :indiff:
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    My BF and I met while in uni (he is 23 now), but he eventually dropped out and started working as a carpenter. I'm Asian , and he's white. We generally thinks somewhat differently, but lately it has been taking a toll on my feelings towards him and I don't know what to do.He is currently making minimum wage and works about 25 hours a week on average. he's still living with his parents. He insisted that the wage is more than fair and he can survive on that salary even if his parents kick him out of the house. I do not believe that's true. I'm in professional school and will have a job that pays 60k a year lined up by big city in 2 years. I want to move to a bigger city to advance my career and he thinks that's unnecessary.He does not believe in women's struggle. For instance, after the whole #freeKe$ha blew up on social media, he said she was the one being dumb because she could have easily still be making music during the 3 years, and then she can release her music all at once after her contract is up, meaning no damage would be done. I tried to explain to him it doesn't work that way for a pop singer's career. But he started calling me names and that I didn't understand anything, and that Ke$ha probably just wants a big chunk of money for her probably not true rape allegation. I just shook my head because I don't really want to argue anymore. (Btw, I was raped as a girl, he knew this, yet still believed firmly in the fact that most rape victims are liars, but that's a different long story for another time)He doesn't know the difference between ethnicity and nationality, or refuses to. I'm Vietnamese British, but he insisted that I'm "asian" therefore can never be considered "British". His step dad is a 3rd generation Pakistani who doesn't speak a lick of Urdu, but he calls his step dad "Paki" and not British. My family are immigrants, which he said "you lots came here to steal British jobs and that's *******s", which is very hurtful to me.He constantly complains about other people being "dumb", which as they say, if you're the smartest person in the room, it's probably not the case. I'm just leaving it that way. His brother, who moved out at the age of 18, worked full time, went to uni full time, got married and had 2 kids before the age of 23. Then landed an engineering job that paid 50k a year, is apparently "irresponsible" in his eyes. He makes fun of me for being a lame "nerd" all the time, which I think is ironic because... Well, nerds make good money?I don't know what should I do with my relationship...Tl;dr my BF thinks about things a lot differently than I do. I love him a lot. But what to do?
    Jesus! Are you low on self esteem? This is your so called bf who says you're here to steal jobs calls his father a paki? Are you mad or what? Dump hij right now or there's ****ing seriously wrong with you too (clearly is wrong in his cretinous mind)

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    It doesn't sound like he's making you happy.
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    Why did you even make this thread? You know the answer to your question hence why you mentioned all the negative aspects of your relationship but not once did you explain why you are still with him.

    Wave him goodbye, hun.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    My BF and I met while in uni (he is 23 now), but he eventually dropped out and started working as a carpenter. I'm Asian , and he's white. We generally thinks somewhat differently, but lately it has been taking a toll on my feelings towards him and I don't know what to do.He is currently making minimum wage and works about 25 hours a week on average. he's still living with his parents. He insisted that the wage is more than fair and he can survive on that salary even if his parents kick him out of the house. I do not believe that's true. I'm in professional school and will have a job that pays 60k a year lined up by big city in 2 years. I want to move to a bigger city to advance my career and he thinks that's unnecessary.He does not believe in women's struggle. For instance, after the whole #freeKe$ha blew up on social media, he said she was the one being dumb because she could have easily still be making music during the 3 years, and then she can release her music all at once after her contract is up, meaning no damage would be done. I tried to explain to him it doesn't work that way for a pop singer's career. But he started calling me names and that I didn't understand anything, and that Ke$ha probably just wants a big chunk of money for her probably not true rape allegation. I just shook my head because I don't really want to argue anymore. (Btw, I was raped as a girl, he knew this, yet still believed firmly in the fact that most rape victims are liars, but that's a different long story for another time)He doesn't know the difference between ethnicity and nationality, or refuses to. I'm Vietnamese British, but he insisted that I'm "asian" therefore can never be considered "British". His step dad is a 3rd generation Pakistani who doesn't speak a lick of Urdu, but he calls his step dad "Paki" and not British. My family are immigrants, which he said "you lots came here to steal British jobs and that's *******s", which is very hurtful to me.He constantly complains about other people being "dumb", which as they say, if you're the smartest person in the room, it's probably not the case. I'm just leaving it that way. His brother, who moved out at the age of 18, worked full time, went to uni full time, got married and had 2 kids before the age of 23. Then landed an engineering job that paid 50k a year, is apparently "irresponsible" in his eyes. He makes fun of me for being a lame "nerd" all the time, which I think is ironic because... Well, nerds make good money?I don't know what should I do with my relationship...Tl;dr my BF thinks about things a lot differently than I do. I love him a lot. But what to do?
    Part of me thinking I'm getting trolled here harddddd. What is there to love about this guy?😂😂😂
    Racist, thick, narrow minded, thinks rape victims are liars EVEN though you were raped?! Fammmm, this guy must look Zac Efron or his sex game is something next level to the Kama Sutra for you to even contemplate staying with him loool
    This is just my opinion, idk the full story but from what you've wrote I'd leave the guy
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    Oh my Gosh! Wake up sister! You're an definitely an A! He's an A, too! An A-hole! You seem smart academically, but in that aspect, you're stupid. It is true that love makes smart people stupid. Leave him. You deserve better. He disrespects your ethnicity. Heck! He disrespects his own family even though he's 100x worse. Go focus on your study. Take your mind off him. Do charity works Go visit your home land. Do volunteering. For all i care, He's going to be your downfall if you keep that relationship going.

    Follow us and you'll see!
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    My BF and I met while in uni (he is 23 now), but he eventually dropped out and started working as a carpenter. I'm Asian , and he's white. We generally thinks somewhat differently, but lately it has been taking a toll on my feelings towards him and I don't know what to do.He is currently making minimum wage and works about 25 hours a week on average. he's still living with his parents. He insisted that the wage is more than fair and he can survive on that salary even if his parents kick him out of the house. I do not believe that's true. I'm in professional school and will have a job that pays 60k a year lined up by big city in 2 years. I want to move to a bigger city to advance my career and he thinks that's unnecessary.He does not believe in women's struggle. For instance, after the whole #freeKe$ha blew up on social media, he said she was the one being dumb because she could have easily still be making music during the 3 years, and then she can release her music all at once after her contract is up, meaning no damage would be done. I tried to explain to him it doesn't work that way for a pop singer's career. But he started calling me names and that I didn't understand anything, and that Ke$ha probably just wants a big chunk of money for her probably not true rape allegation. I just shook my head because I don't really want to argue anymore. (Btw, I was raped as a girl, he knew this, yet still believed firmly in the fact that most rape victims are liars, but that's a different long story for another time)He doesn't know the difference between ethnicity and nationality, or refuses to. I'm Vietnamese British, but he insisted that I'm "asian" therefore can never be considered "British". His step dad is a 3rd generation Pakistani who doesn't speak a lick of Urdu, but he calls his step dad "Paki" and not British. My family are immigrants, which he said "you lots came here to steal British jobs and that's *******s", which is very hurtful to me.He constantly complains about other people being "dumb", which as they say, if you're the smartest person in the room, it's probably not the case. I'm just leaving it that way. His brother, who moved out at the age of 18, worked full time, went to uni full time, got married and had 2 kids before the age of 23. Then landed an engineering job that paid 50k a year, is apparently "irresponsible" in his eyes. He makes fun of me for being a lame "nerd" all the time, which I think is ironic because... Well, nerds make good money?I don't know what should I do with my relationship...Tl;dr my BF thinks about things a lot differently than I do. I love him a lot. But what to do?
    Why on earth are you still with him? You can do loads better than him.

    Get shot and find yourself a boyfriend whose worthy of your respect and love; he clearly isn't
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    My BF and I met while in uni (he is 23 now), but he eventually dropped out and started working as a carpenter. I'm Asian , and he's white. We generally thinks somewhat differently, but lately it has been taking a toll on my feelings towards him and I don't know what to do.He is currently making minimum wage and works about 25 hours a week on average. he's still living with his parents. He insisted that the wage is more than fair and he can survive on that salary even if his parents kick him out of the house. I do not believe that's true. I'm in professional school and will have a job that pays 60k a year lined up by big city in 2 years. I want to move to a bigger city to advance my career and he thinks that's unnecessary.He does not believe in women's struggle. For instance, after the whole #freeKe$ha blew up on social media, he said she was the one being dumb because she could have easily still be making music during the 3 years, and then she can release her music all at once after her contract is up, meaning no damage would be done. I tried to explain to him it doesn't work that way for a pop singer's career. But he started calling me names and that I didn't understand anything, and that Ke$ha probably just wants a big chunk of money for her probably not true rape allegation. I just shook my head because I don't really want to argue anymore. (Btw, I was raped as a girl, he knew this, yet still believed firmly in the fact that most rape victims are liars, but that's a different long story for another time)He doesn't know the difference between ethnicity and nationality, or refuses to. I'm Vietnamese British, but he insisted that I'm "asian" therefore can never be considered "British". His step dad is a 3rd generation Pakistani who doesn't speak a lick of Urdu, but he calls his step dad "Paki" and not British. My family are immigrants, which he said "you lots came here to steal British jobs and that's *******s", which is very hurtful to me.He constantly complains about other people being "dumb", which as they say, if you're the smartest person in the room, it's probably not the case. I'm just leaving it that way. His brother, who moved out at the age of 18, worked full time, went to uni full time, got married and had 2 kids before the age of 23. Then landed an engineering job that paid 50k a year, is apparently "irresponsible" in his eyes. He makes fun of me for being a lame "nerd" all the time, which I think is ironic because... Well, nerds make good money?I don't know what should I do with my relationship...Tl;dr my BF thinks about things a lot differently than I do. I love him a lot. But what to do?
    H

    Hmm, must have a big **** or something.

    You can't be that smart and dumb at the same time. Feelings make people dumb
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    My BF and I met while in uni (he is 23 now), but he eventually dropped out and started working as a carpenter. I'm Asian , and he's white. We generally thinks somewhat differently, but lately it has been taking a toll on my feelings towards him and I don't know what to do.He is currently making minimum wage and works about 25 hours a week on average. he's still living with his parents. He insisted that the wage is more than fair and he can survive on that salary even if his parents kick him out of the house. I do not believe that's true. I'm in professional school and will have a job that pays 60k a year lined up by big city in 2 years. I want to move to a bigger city to advance my career and he thinks that's unnecessary.He does not believe in women's struggle. For instance, after the whole #freeKe$ha blew up on social media, he said she was the one being dumb because she could have easily still be making music during the 3 years, and then she can release her music all at once after her contract is up, meaning no damage would be done. I tried to explain to him it doesn't work that way for a pop singer's career. But he started calling me names and that I didn't understand anything, and that Ke$ha probably just wants a big chunk of money for her probably not true rape allegation. I just shook my head because I don't really want to argue anymore. (Btw, I was raped as a girl, he knew this, yet still believed firmly in the fact that most rape victims are liars, but that's a different long story for another time)He doesn't know the difference between ethnicity and nationality, or refuses to. I'm Vietnamese British, but he insisted that I'm "asian" therefore can never be considered "British". His step dad is a 3rd generation Pakistani who doesn't speak a lick of Urdu, but he calls his step dad "Paki" and not British. My family are immigrants, which he said "you lots came here to steal British jobs and that's *******s", which is very hurtful to me.He constantly complains about other people being "dumb", which as they say, if you're the smartest person in the room, it's probably not the case. I'm just leaving it that way. His brother, who moved out at the age of 18, worked full time, went to uni full time, got married and had 2 kids before the age of 23. Then landed an engineering job that paid 50k a year, is apparently "irresponsible" in his eyes. He makes fun of me for being a lame "nerd" all the time, which I think is ironic because... Well, nerds make good money?I don't know what should I do with my relationship...Tl;dr my BF thinks about things a lot differently than I do. I love him a lot. But what to do?
    Girl, you are way out of his league. I'm sorry to say this but your boyfriend sounds like a loser. You can find someone much better who will be a way better fit; someone educated, open-minded and who has ambition. Don't waste good years of your youth on this guy. The longer you stay with him the more it will hurt when you decide to leave.
    • #5
    #5

    I am Indian and I have been with an Arab guy who was racist, so I understand why you stayed despite that. You love him, so you're staying. But I wouldn't deal with him much longer because it's nothing nice to be hearing from him all the time.

    I would leave him immediately, best of luck xxx
 
 
 
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