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Is my mum addicted, or should I just leave her be ? watch

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    Ok so I stayed at my parents for a bit and my mum spends ages on playstation. She is nearly 64 and after retiring a few years ago has become really lazy. She spends most of the time lying on the couch either watching TV or on playstation. She does do jobs around the house etc but gets grumpy and starts swearing when she has to but its the time she spends on playtation Im wondering about.

    My dad has been telling her for ages that she spends far too long on it and that he doesnt want him on it all the time. He has threatened to get rid of it if she carries on and that he doesnt like living with her anymore (he has been saying this since they got married though according to my aunt lol)

    She will get up about 9 am and will spend most of the day on playstation (getting up now and then to make herself a drink) until 6pm when my dad gets home. She will quickly turn it off when she hears him come home. She will make my dad a drink and some dinner (usually some ready meal) then they watch tv together.There is usually some argument over what to have on she usually wants sport on but my dad wants to watch the news so she starts complaining saying that the news is boring and they just repeat the same stuff. Sometimes my dad will get annoyed and demand that she gives her the remote control and she does reluctantly.At about 8pm ish my dad will go upstairs to bed/watching a dvd and then my mum will put playstation back on and have it on all night until she goes to bed which is usually about 3/4am.

    She will fall asleep during a game most nights and her character will be lying on the ground on the screen with other players kicking it :/ She usually has a headphone/microphone set on too and starts snoring so all the other players online will probably be hearing this! When she is awake you can hear her saying '****ing hell' or '****' all the time when she dies or other players shoot her. At weekends she will dominate the TV until my dad demands she hands her the remote.

    Its been going on for about 4 years. She went on holiday a few months ago and was fine without a playstation so its not like she suffers if she is away from it, although she was really grumpy because the tv wouldnt work and said that there was no point in her comming.What do you think? Is she addicted or is this how a lot of people live their lives? I suppose in a way playing on playstation is being more active then watching TV as you are engaging but yea just wanted opinions... could be totally normal for all I know I dont know that many families the ones I do are very active and into sports but I cant compare her with these. She used to be very hard working and has always worked full time in nursing its since retirement she has gone like this. When its brought up she just says that shes worked 45 years so has done her bit.
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    What's her PSN?
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    (Original post by Ablicious)
    What's her PSN?
    looool strong first post

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    x


    OP, your mum's behaviour is not normal or healthy. Ask her is she really going to be happy to spend the next 20 years or so of her life playing video games?

    She's obviously in need of a hobby, but by just playing video games all day she's effectively given up on real life.

    Does she not have friends she can spend time with?....also, given her age, she should try to find a hobby that will help keep her healthy, but also help her socialise (lots of studies show that lack of social activity in old age makes the brain deteriorate faster) - maybe something like yoga or swimming classes etc
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    I don't think she's actually addicted. I think she definitely plays too much. But she sounds like a 12 year old - behaviour wise. Not saying she's a child but she plays as much as teenagers do, if not more. The headset/swearing etc, just goes with the games she plays. To be honest, if she wants to play all day she can, if it's causing arguments and being disruptive, you need and your dad need to talk to her and try to find an alternative. Try to find a way where she can play as much as she wants, but is understanding enough so that she will turn it off when it's time to. She also needs a routine, sleeping at 3/4am is not good. Suggest that she play as much as she like, but turns it off at 6pm.

    Also, don't put your family up against other families and your idea of them.

    To answer your question basically, a lot of people are like this, ranging from 12 year olds to 60 year olds. Gaming is a new way to escape. Would you be complaining/worried if instead of gaming she read books 24/7, or painted or knitted?
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    (Original post by Davalla)
    Can I have some more details please; I searched for moonshine4 but 69 players came up.
    I'm going round later so will try to find out
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    wow that is impressive she is playing on the playstation at 64 i would say its fine unless she is not looking after herself properly i.e not washing, or eating then i would get involved but its fine my cousins play on their ps4 all day long and its only a problem for them as they have exams to revise for so its not good for them to be on it all day every day, so think you should leave her be.
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    (Original post by KyleH123)
    Get to uni and get the f**k out. Sounds like such a negative place to be.
    I'm out already, she just says that she's happy with her life and that she's done her bit.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I'm out already, she just says that she's happy with her life and that she's done her bit.
    Curious, you said she retired like 4 years ago right.

    Did she choose to retire at that time, or did something like an injury make her retire?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I'm going round later so will try to find out
    Maybe try inviting her out to try different activities?
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    (Original post by Karaleigh19)
    I don't think she's actually addicted. I think she definitely plays too much. But she sounds like a 12 year old - behaviour wise. Not saying she's a child but she plays as much as teenagers do, if not more. The headset/swearing etc, just goes with the games she plays. To be honest, if she wants to play all day she can, if it's causing arguments and being disruptive, you need and your dad need to talk to her and try to find an alternative. Try to find a way where she can play as much as she wants, but is understanding enough so that she will turn it off when it's time to. She also needs a routine, sleeping at 3/4am is not good. Suggest that she play as much as she like, but turns it off at 6pm.

    Also, don't put your family up against other families and your idea of them.

    To answer your question basically, a lot of people are like this, ranging from 12 year olds to 60 year olds. Gaming is a new way to escape. Would you be complaining/worried if instead of gaming she read books 24/7, or painted or knitted?
    Yeh that's a good point, i guess knitting is more constructive though like you get something from it at the end. My uncle is quite similar to her with the childish behaviour apparently he doesn't play on a console but he will do things like watch tv all day then when the wife gets in suddenly start doing jobs to make it look like he's been busy all day. He will lie about it.

    Don't get married!
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    (Original post by Death Grips)
    Curious, you said she retired like 4 years ago right.

    Did she choose to retire at that time, or did something like an injury make her retire?
    She chose to basically she was working full time the job was getting stressful and my dad suggested it. She used to be very physically fit and has always kept active until she retired, I don't know how she has stayed so slim now as she's sat down most of the time and doesn't eat healthy.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Yeh that's a good point, i guess knitting is more constructive though like you get something from it at the end. My uncle is quite similar to her with the childish behaviour apparently he doesn't play on a console but he will do things like watch tv all day then when the wife gets in suddenly start doing jobs to make it look like he's been busy all day. He will lie about it.

    Don't get married!
    You do get something out of gaming - mental stimulation and minor social interaction. Of course she'll benefit more from going out and meeting people and doing more beneficial activities, but if gaming keeps her happy and it's something she enjoys, I wouldn't try take that away from her. Try to encourage her to go out more and don't focus on the PlayStation, instead just suggest other things for her to do without even saying anything about games.

    People lie about it because they know they should be doing other things, but they don't do them because they are usually to involved in what they want to do. In that case, your uncle watches TV all day and doesn't exactly want to show it off to the world because he knows he should be doing chores etc. It's a very common thing and the only thing you can do to help is encourage them and motivate them to do other things they will also enjoy.
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    Why do you keep mixing the words "him" and "her" up?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    She chose to basically she was working full time the job was getting stressful and my dad suggested it. She used to be very physically fit and has always kept active until she retired, I don't know how she has stayed so slim now as she's sat down most of the time and doesn't eat healthy.
    As I mentioned before your mum should try to spend her time in a way that's more constructive and will ultimately make her happier.

    Spending all day playing video games suggests dissatisfaction with life and a desire to escape from real life. I think it would help for you to talk to her and try to understand how she's feeling and what's driving this behaviour (i.e. the obsession with video games).

    You said she was a nurse before, right? So I assume she enjoys helping people. Maybe she should do some volunteering to help fill her time.
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    (Original post by Death Grips)
    looool strong first post





    OP, your mum's behaviour is not normal or healthy. Ask her is she really going to be happy to spend the next 20 years or so of her life playing video games?

    She's obviously in need of a hobby, but by just playing video games all day she's effectively given up on real life.

    Does she not have friends she can spend time with?....also, given her age, she should try to find a hobby that will help keep her healthy, but also help her socialise (lots of studies show that lack of social activity in old age makes the brain deteriorate faster) - maybe something like yoga or swimming classes etc
    She's been asked that countless times, her answer is yes she's happy with her life on PlayStation, she doesn't like being told what to do. She said that she's done all the other things like going out etc when she was younger.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Yeh that's a good point, i guess knitting is more constructive though like you get something from it at the end. My uncle is quite similar to her with the childish behaviour apparently he doesn't play on a console but he will do things like watch tv all day then when the wife gets in suddenly start doing jobs to make it look like he's been busy all day. He will lie about it.

    Don't get married!
    the uncle sounds like me :jester:
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    Does she have CoD?
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    (Original post by Death Grips)
    looool strong first post





    OP, your mum's behaviour is not normal or healthy. Ask her is she really going to be happy to spend the next 20 years or so of her life playing video games?

    She's obviously in need of a hobby, but by just playing video games all day she's effectively given up on real life.

    Does she not have friends she can spend time with?....also, given her age, she should try to find a hobby that will help keep her healthy, but also help her socialise (lots of studies show that lack of social activity in old age makes the brain deteriorate faster) - maybe something like yoga or swimming classes etc
    That's if she's still alive in 20 years time?
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    (Original post by Death Grips)
    As I mentioned before your mum should try to spend her time in a way that's more constructive and will ultimately make her happier.

    Spending all day playing video games suggests dissatisfaction with life and a desire to escape from real life. I think it would help for you to talk to her and try to understand how she's feeling and what's driving this behaviour (i.e. the obsession with video games).

    You said she was a nurse before, right? So I assume she enjoys helping people. Maybe she should do some volunteering to help fill her time.
    Ha, if if I mentioned volunteering she would be like 'what the hell I've done my work', she sees herself as done with work as she's been doing it for 45 years. I wish she would do something that stimulating but she won't.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Ok so I stayed at my parents for a bit and my mum spends ages on playstation. She is nearly 64 and after retiring a few years ago has become really lazy. She spends most of the time lying on the couch either watching TV or on playstation. She does do jobs around the house etc but gets grumpy and starts swearing when she has to but its the time she spends on playtation Im wondering about.

    My dad has been telling her for ages that she spends far too long on it and that he doesnt want him on it all the time. He has threatened to get rid of it if she carries on and that he doesnt like living with her anymore (he has been saying this since they got married though according to my aunt lol)

    She will get up about 9 am and will spend most of the day on playstation (getting up now and then to make herself a drink) until 6pm when my dad gets home. She will quickly turn it off when she hears him come home. She will make my dad a drink and some dinner (usually some ready meal) then they watch tv together.There is usually some argument over what to have on she usually wants sport on but my dad wants to watch the news so she starts complaining saying that the news is boring and they just repeat the same stuff. Sometimes my dad will get annoyed and demand that she gives her the remote control and she does reluctantly.At about 8pm ish my dad will go upstairs to bed/watching a dvd and then my mum will put playstation back on and have it on all night until she goes to bed which is usually about 3/4am.

    She will fall asleep during a game most nights and her character will be lying on the ground on the screen with other players kicking it :/ She usually has a headphone/microphone set on too and starts snoring so all the other players online will probably be hearing this! When she is awake you can hear her saying '****ing hell' or '****' all the time when she dies or other players shoot her. At weekends she will dominate the TV until my dad demands she hands her the remote.

    Its been going on for about 4 years. She went on holiday a few months ago and was fine without a playstation so its not like she suffers if she is away from it, although she was really grumpy because the tv wouldnt work and said that there was no point in her comming.What do you think? Is she addicted or is this how a lot of people live their lives? I suppose in a way playing on playstation is being more active then watching TV as you are engaging but yea just wanted opinions... could be totally normal for all I know I dont know that many families the ones I do are very active and into sports but I cant compare her with these. She used to be very hard working and has always worked full time in nursing its since retirement she has gone like this. When its brought up she just says that shes worked 45 years so has done her bit.
    Some of what you've described just there sounds just like my mum. =/ Mine is 45 tho.
 
 
 
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