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Trying not to date / been made redundant watch

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    Unfortunately I've been made redundant and I'm trying to reframe from dating until I'm in a better place. I just want some encouragement that this is a good way to go about it... because right now, I do want to meet someone and date.

    Problem is that a many of my previous dating experiences have ended unpleasant for me. Cheating and lies etc. I'm attractive girl but somehow nothing ever works out.
    My last boyfriend (only of 3 months!) tried to turn me into a casual FWB... I was falling for him and was pretty devastated at how little he actually cared.
    My confidence hit near rock bottom.
    Then I went on a couple dates with an amazing guy (v. attractive, good job, similar interests) I felt really hopeful until he messaged me saying that he was getting back with his ex.

    Seeing my ex's and people that I've dated on Facebook seemingly enjoying themselves when I'm sitting here with no money and no job is making me feel bitter.
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    I don't think you need to refrain from dating just because of being made redundant.
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    No money, no job. You'll find someone soon enough, especially with your positive attitude with wanting to date.
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    I think it's redundant to wait it out and see if your prospects get better, I very much understand the logic and the sort of protection that might come with it when asked what you do for a living. However any decent guy isn't going to care if you have many other qualities (attractive, educated, look after yourself) as long as you are looking for a job, hell he might even open a few doors for you if he's a gentleman (yes that double meaning was intentional, I do this a lot)
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    (Original post by Impressive)
    No money, no job. You'll find someone soon enough, especially with your positive attitude with wanting to date.
    Thanks for your response! I am not even sure what answers i'm really searching for from this post. I do want to find someone but it's just hard keeping positive when dating has brought me more upset than joy, and with my redundancy i'm at a pretty low point in my life right now, as much as I want to date, I am scared of been beaten down lower.
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    (Original post by daisy0030)
    Unfortunately I've been made redundant and I'm trying to reframe from dating until I'm in a better place. I just want some encouragement that this is a good way to go about it... because right now, I do want to meet someone and date.

    Problem is that a many of my previous dating experiences have ended unpleasant for me. Cheating and lies etc. I'm attractive girl but somehow nothing ever works out.
    My last boyfriend (only of 3 months!) tried to turn me into a casual FWB... I was falling for him and was pretty devastated at how little he actually cared.
    My confidence hit near rock bottom.
    Then I went on a couple dates with an amazing guy (v. attractive, good job, similar interests) I felt really hopeful until he messaged me saying that he was getting back with his ex.

    Seeing my ex's and people that I've dated on Facebook seemingly enjoying themselves when I'm sitting here with no money and no job is making me feel bitter.
    You are doing the right thing. If I were you I would defo wait till I had a job, before getting back into dating.
    These days going on dates can be pretty expensive haha.
    I could imagine how you feel about your ex though. Maybe unfollowing him on fb might make things atleast a little easier.
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    (Original post by whorace)
    I think it's redundant to wait it out and see if your prospects get better, I very much understand the logic and the sort of protection that might come with it when asked what you do for a living. However any decent guy isn't going to care if you have many other qualities (attractive, educated, look after yourself) as long as you are looking for a job, hell he might even open a few doors for you if he's a gentleman (yes that double meaning was intentional, I do this a lot)
    Thanks for the advice!
    The last few guys I've met were actually from Tinder! (I don't seem to meet many new people in real life- my friendship group are not that sociable, and neither have I met people through hobbies or the small firm i use to work at)
    I don't think I would be able to tell a guy that i was dating that im currently unemployed, id feel embarrassed / ashamed about it (I know it happens and shouldn't feel like that - but I do!)
    My main concerns within dating is that I will get hurt when I'm already at a quite a low point with confidence right now. But I keep thinking about my ex's and I really just want to find someone else and move on.
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    (Original post by daisy0030)
    Thanks for your response! I am not even sure what answers i'm really searching for from this post. I do want to find someone but it's just hard keeping positive when dating has brought me more upset than joy, and with my redundancy i'm at a pretty low point in my life right now, as much as I want to date, I am scared of been beaten down lower.
    Are you looking for a positive quote from me?

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