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depression/anxiety diagnosis left too late? Watch

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    looking back, i've been feeling "off" for 5-6 years, it started at school when i didn't get into first choice uni (rejected post interview). i went though a kind of grieving process, cried every day for 4-5 months, was very spaced out, angry with myself, couldn't concentrate. it felt like weeks passed at a blink.
    got into all the other unis, but didn't really care for them, went to the most prestigious one. (now realise i should have taken time to find a place i actually liked). at university, i still couldn't get over my "loss", spent a lot of my time on an emotional rollercoaster, lost interest in my subject, felt worthless, weird sleeping and eating patterns emerged. passed first year and second year comfortably, had other things on the side like internships and uni involvements but deep down i felt like i was doing them in order to compensate. final year was incredibly difficult because of logistics (moved family home - i still live with my parents), and my dad had health problems (lives abroad - parents divorced). i had real trouble concentrating, highs and lows. failed final year, got a job with the hope to retake the following year, failed again. from this point on i've actually been told at home that i'm stupid and worthless.

    a different uni took me on, thankfully, that was like a brighter turning point for me. i'm in my final year now. however, things became difficult at home, i was not only feeling i was behind in life, i was being told so. i'm doing better academically, partly because exams are in two blocks now - january and june, but i've developed further physical symptoms like chest pains, limb twitching, on the verge of crying a LOT of the time for no reason... blacked out in an exam once for a brief moment mood swings also haven't gone away, although i feel more "present" now. i've also suffered from a nervous stammer since childhood, which was never treated, that makes me feel even less adequate and confident. told my personal tutor about it, also went to an initial counselling session today.. broke down crying in front of the woman, couldn't get out much speech-wise. she suggested CBT but likely to start in about a month. also told me to see my GP for medication, but i'm weary of the side effects during revision time.
    what i'm thinking - have i left it all too late now? should i even bother, being in final year? i've got my project presentation in 8 weeks' time and am freaking out about it already... i also see how the department may question the validity of my misfortunes so close to the final exams, like if i've suffered with it for so long, why am i only getting checked out now? truth is - i didn't think i had a problem, my mother witnessed my distress and did nothing 5 years ago or later. now i'm just sick of feeling this way, it's affecting my decision making
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    i also reacted quite badly to my last set of results... i passed everything but i had bigger expectations.. it's taken me about a month to accept this, for about three weeks i cried myself to sleep most days. a few days following receipt of the news, i went through a kind of "self-punishment" - i punched my thighs, scratched them... i had an episode where i hit myself on the forehead repeatedly, got a bruise
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    Tbh, I would def go see your GP. Even if you don't wanna start meds right away, I'd imagine your uni would only accept a letter from a GP or psychiatrist as proof of a mental health problem/diagnosis. So you'd need to go anyway.

    It sounds like these problems have been going on a very long time and as though you are very hard on yourself for things that you shouldn't be so hung up on I think CBT could help to learn how to identify and unlearn these thought processes, so def give it a try once offered it.

    You probs should have got help a bit earlier but like you say, you didn't recognise you had problems because your thoughts and feelings were being invalidated at home. It's always better late than never, so do keep seeking the help you both need and deserve :yes:
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    (Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd)
    Tbh, I would def go see your GP. Even if you don't wanna start meds right away, I'd imagine your uni would only accept a letter from a GP or psychiatrist as proof of a mental health problem/diagnosis. So you'd need to go anyway.

    It sounds like these problems have been going on a very long time and as though you are very hard on yourself for things that you shouldn't be so hung up on I think CBT could help to learn how to identify and unlearn these thought processes, so def give it a try once offered it.

    You probs should have got help a bit earlier but like you say, you didn't recognise you had problems because your thoughts and feelings were being invalidated at home. It's always better late than never, so do keep seeking the help you both need and deserve :yes:
    thank you for your reply and kindness *hugs*
    when in the "storm" while still at school i did go to some online help, i think the website is called Kooth.... i spent hours on there talking to counsellors, but it was just venting really. then I went to uni but my GP was in my home town 2 hours away. i have a different gp now but for only about a year and i felt more or less ok last year. now i'm in the middle of applying to MSc courses and i know i won't get accepted everywhere and that's ok. i'm just kind of scared that i won't cope and it'll send me down a spiral again
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    It is honestly never too late to combat mental illness, you're the key to getting past it and I have complete faith in you! Visit your go, and work it out from there good luck op!!
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    (Original post by foihi)
    thank you for your reply and kindness *hugs*
    when in the "storm" while still at school i did go to some online help, i think the website is called Kooth.... i spent hours on there talking to counsellors, but it was just venting really. then I went to uni but my GP was in my home town 2 hours away. i have a different gp now but for only about a year and i felt more or less ok last year. now i'm in the middle of applying to MSc courses and i know i won't get accepted everywhere and that's ok. i'm just kind of scared that i won't cope and it'll send me down a spiral again
    Counselling and CBT are quite different: CBT is more focused and goal-directed, and you'll get "homework" to do, etc. I think if you can learn to engage with it and be honest with your therapist, it might help in some small way in the long-term.

    Are you sure you're in a stable mindframe to be applying to MSc courses atm? I don't wanna discourage you completely or anything - it can be good to have something to work towards. But they can be hard work and stress can exacerbate existing mental health issues :sadnod:
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    (Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd)
    Counselling and CBT are quite different: CBT is more focused and goal-directed, and you'll get "homework" to do, etc. I think if you can learn to engage with it and be honest with your therapist, it might help in some small way in the long-term.

    Are you sure you're in a stable mindframe to be applying to MSc courses atm? I don't wanna discourage you completely or anything - it can be good to have something to work towards. But they can be hard work and stress can exacerbate existing mental health issues :sadnod:

    yes, the difference was explained to me today... counselling is more like digging in the past and understanding where issues are from, and CBT is more learning techniques how to face certain situations.. i think the latter will be more useful, especially with the presentation coming up. i mentioned that counselling website because it's the only thing i did seek all those years ago, i don't use it now.
    honestly, i don't feel confident with MSc, i've been doubtful whether i'll pass that... but i've applied already, even if it's without belief i'll get a place, partly to satisfy my mother's wishes. but i do genuinely want to study again.
    slightly off topic, but what is the difference between a general gp appointment and a routine one? would it be ok to book a routine appointment for this matter? no general ones seem to be available on their website
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    Never too late.

    Go to see your GP for diagnosis and treatment. To get better also to tic if needed for uni. they cant if they dont know.

    You also need to let your tutor know/ dept. they can trace it back to your other uni and see its an ongoing issue. Hopefully they see how bright you are (theyr are experienced) and they cna decide what adjustments need to be made.

    Bit of a journey for you. You cna discuss your concerns on medication with your GP. You also need to eat a balanced diet, try and relax plys a bit of exercise cna be great for depression.

    theres some support services you cna chat to here
    http://www.mind.org.uk/information-s...e-support/#lis

    Hang in there.
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    (Original post by 999tigger)
    Never too late.

    Go to see your GP for diagnosis and treatment. To get better also to tic if needed for uni. they cant if they dont know.

    You also need to let your tutor know/ dept. they can trace it back to your other uni and see its an ongoing issue. Hopefully they see how bright you are (theyr are experienced) and they cna decide what adjustments need to be made.

    Bit of a journey for you. You cna discuss your concerns on medication with your GP. You also need to eat a balanced diet, try and relax plys a bit of exercise cna be great for depression.

    theres some support services you cna chat to here
    http://www.mind.org.uk/information-s...e-support/#lis

    Hang in there.
    thank you for your reply i don't quite understand what you mean by tracing back to other uni - there was no record of me telling anyone anything was wrong with me or my life, i checked the mitigating circumstances beforehand and my family stuff didn't fall into it.
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    (Original post by foihi)
    yes, the difference was explained to me today... counselling is more like digging in the past and understanding where issues are from, and CBT is more learning techniques how to face certain situations.. i think the latter will be more useful, especially with the presentation coming up. i mentioned that counselling website because it's the only thing i did seek all those years ago, i don't use it now.
    honestly, i don't feel confident with MSc, i've been doubtful whether i'll pass that... but i've applied already, even if it's without belief i'll get a place, partly to satisfy my mother's wishes. but i do genuinely want to study again.
    slightly off topic, but what is the difference between a general gp appointment and a routine one? would it be ok to book a routine appointment for this matter? no general ones seem to be available on their website
    I'm not too sure what the difference is but I suspect a routine appointment is where you have a specific condition and therefore have to see the GP/the GP wants to see you every X amount of weeks? Whereas a general one may be more... general? :dontknow: Dunno, sorry - my GP practice doesn't have that symptom.

    I hope you don't mind me asking this but are you South Asian at all? Coz your parents sound very typically South Asian... hope that's not rude (I'm South Asian myself, that's why I noticed/am asking)
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    yeah but generally i come off quite nervous and quiet... my tutor didn't even seem that surprised with my stammer issue, so i guess they suspect/expect something
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    (Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd)
    I'm not too sure what the difference is but I suspect a routine appointment is where you have a specific condition and therefore have to see the GP/the GP wants to see you every X amount of weeks? Whereas a general one may be more... general? :dontknow: Dunno, sorry - my GP practice doesn't have that symptom.

    I hope you don't mind me asking this but are you South Asian at all? Coz your parents sound very typically South Asian... hope that's not rude (I'm South Asian myself, that's why I noticed/am asking)
    there's a peculiar online system, it says no general appts available but lots of routine (10-15 mins) and some "training" (whatever that means). 10 mins enough for anxiety diagnosis? oh my, how am i going to tell it all, i struggled for half an hour before the counselling lady.. ah.
    no, i'm not south asian, i'll message you
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    (Original post by foihi)
    thank you for your reply i don't quite understand what you mean by tracing back to other uni - there was no record of me telling anyone anything was wrong with me or my life, i checked the mitigating circumstances beforehand and my family stuff didn't fall into it.
    I meant if you disclose it to your GP that you have been through difficult times before (thats how you ended up at your current uni) then he could probably see youve been suffering with some mental trauma, anxiety or depression for a long time. Thing its its just not been diagnosed. means you cna make more of a case for mitigating circs if need be.

    Oh and its not too late and you can deal with it.
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    (Original post by 999tigger)
    I meant if you disclose it to your GP that you have been through difficult times before (thats how you ended up at your current uni) then he could probably see youve been suffering with some mental trauma, anxiety or depression for a long time. Thing its its just not been diagnosed. means you cna make more of a case for mitigating circs if need be.

    Oh and its not too late and you can deal with it.
    I get you now, thank you so much!
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    No worries drop me a line if you struggle. Anyone that had done the 3rd year twice would have been traumatised, so its not that you are weak youve just been unhappy and not diagnosed.
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    (Original post by 999tigger)
    No worries drop me a line if you struggle. Anyone that had done the 3rd year twice would have been traumatised, so its not that you are weak youve just been unhappy and not diagnosed.
    Just brilliant advice throughout.
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    (Original post by Jennie1987)
    Just brilliant advice throughout.
    embarrassed, but thanks.


    OP can I just say something about mitigating circumstances.


    The most important thing is to get you diagnosed and treated so you get beyyer and get on top of all this trauma/ anxiety/ stress/ depression or whatever it is. the aim ofc is to be happy , carefree and optimistic.

    That said with mitigating circumstances there tends to be be two sorts.

    Type 1. As soon as something comes wrong they know the rules and start pleading MC remark resit regrade. they know how the system works and make sure they get ebery advantage they can or alternatively and disadvantage compesnated for becayse they are competitive amd kmow the rules.

    Type 2. Those who struggle on and dont ask for help, they feel embarrassed and weak about it. That means their disadvantage is never recognised, nobody will know or care and you go off with marks which werent a true representation, especially if you were not mentally well.

    What matters is you get diagnosed and then make sure you get fair consideration by your department to takewhat youve been though into account and they know the score. It requires you to fight your corner and be a bit pushy, so dont be shy.

    When the grades are done then nobody else will care. make sure your situation is known about so you get a fair ****, so you have no regrets when you look back. the type 1 people will look after themselves, so be strong and speak up.
    get a stydent rep if you dont know what to do. Anyone would have difficulties with your journey.
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    (Original post by 999tigger)
    embarrassed, but thanks.


    OP can I just say something about mitigating circumstances.


    The most important thing is to get you diagnosed and treated so you get beyyer and get on top of all this trauma/ anxiety/ stress/ depression or whatever it is. the aim ofc is to be happy , carefree and optimistic.

    That said with mitigating circumstances there tends to be be two sorts.

    Type 1. As soon as something comes wrong they know the rules and start pleading MC remark resit regrade. they know how the system works and make sure they get ebery advantage they can or alternatively and disadvantage compesnated for becayse they are competitive amd kmow the rules.

    Type 2. Those who struggle on and dont ask for help, they feel embarrassed and weak about it. That means their disadvantage is never recognised, nobody will know or care and you go off with marks which werent a true representation, especially if you were not mentally well.

    What matters is you get diagnosed and then make sure you get fair consideration by your department to takewhat youve been though into account and they know the score. It requires you to fight your corner and be a bit pushy, so dont be shy.

    When the grades are done then nobody else will care. make sure your situation is known about so you get a fair ****, so you have no regrets when you look back. the type 1 people will look after themselves, so be strong and speak up.
    get a stydent rep if you dont know what to do. Anyone would have difficulties with your journey.
    I didn't know this really... I thought it was if something very extreme happens, if your immediate family dies in the exam period or you physically collapse in the hall... hell, i've struggled with period pains (i get them very quite bad but my blood pressure falls also which is more dangerous because i risk fainting) and that's not a MC, at least not in my last uni. that happened to me during one exam.. a pregnancy also wasn't a MC there - a mature student was heavily pregnant and they just shrugged her off like you can delay by a year if you want. my new uni seems more accommodating. same pregnancy situation - girl starting her second trimester but gets her own room + break time.
    i've only got 4 modules in the summer including the presentation, so most of it is done really.. and my MSc application is riding on my existing marks pre-diagnosis. eh well what will be - will be.
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    (Original post by 999tigger)
    embarrassed, but thanks.
    Aw you, :hugs: this morning someone was saying their boyfriend was becoming depressed and all she could think is 'get over it'. The amount of imaginary things I wanted to say to this ignorance! You restored my faith in people. And you're far more coherent than I would be.
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    I'm not sure what you've already done, but I would recommend seeing your GP, and seeing if they can write a letter to the university. You could then submit mitigating circumstances before you sit your exams. I don't know how this works at your university, but I can't imagine it would give you "extra marks" for example, but if you failed, then they could take that into consideration when it comes to awarding a degree/allowing resits etc.
 
 
 
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