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Best friend has changed completely after his breakup. Watch

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    So my best friend and his gf broke up back in August just before he was about to leave for uni. It shocked me because he had been smitten with her and she had loved him a lot too but I didn't say much about it. My best friend was really upset the night they broke up and then literally two weeks later he was going clubbing and pulling girls. I thought he was just trying to spend some time with his other friends (who are literally the typical lads) The real change happened was when we both went off to university together. During Freshers week, he started having one night stands and got really drunk. A few weeks later he started openly *****ing about his ex, which annoyed me a little because I sometimes talk to her and she's always lovely to me and has never actually done anything like he's doing. Anyway, he started calling her ugly and pathetic and that he preferred one night stands over a relationship anyday. We got into a massive fight when I told him to leave her alone and that *****ing about her made him look bitter.
    He's normally a very chilled and calm guy but ever since he broke up with her he's become angry,aggressive, he's been partying too much, he's constantly boasting about how much he sleeps around and he is literally against the idea of relationships because it's too nauseating apparently.

    We're not talking atm because he's still annoyed at me but by the impression I'm getting, I think he still has feelings for her and he's trying to fill the void by trying to be all tough.

    I'm a girl so I'm clueless with this so can anyone help? Sorry for the long post.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    So my best friend and his gf broke up back in August just before he was about to leave for uni. It shocked me because he had been smitten with her and she had loved him a lot too but I didn't say much about it. My best friend was really upset the night they broke up and then literally two weeks later he was going clubbing and pulling girls. I thought he was just trying to spend some time with his other friends (who are literally the typical lads) The real change happened was when we both went off to university together. During Freshers week, he started having one night stands and got really drunk. A few weeks later he started openly *****ing about his ex, which annoyed me a little because I sometimes talk to her and she's always lovely to me and has never actually done anything like he's doing. Anyway, he started calling her ugly and pathetic and that he preferred one night stands over a relationship anyday. We got into a massive fight when I told him to leave her alone and that *****ing about her made him look bitter.
    He's normally a very chilled and calm guy but ever since he broke up with her he's become angry,aggressive, he's been partying too much, he's constantly boasting about how much he sleeps around and he is literally against the idea of relationships because it's too nauseating apparently.

    We're not talking atm because he's still annoyed at me but by the impression I'm getting, I think he still has feelings for her and he's trying to fill the void by trying to be all tough.

    I'm a girl so I'm clueless with this so can anyone help? Sorry for the long post.
    :hmmmm: I can't help but feel like I've heard this before.

    Let them both get on with whatever they're doing. If you're really not one of the two people involved then just.. I dunno, try to talk him round. But if it doesn't work, then there's nothing more you can do.
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    (Original post by SeanFM)
    :hmmmm: I can't help but feel like I've heard this before.

    Let them both get on with whatever they're doing. If you're really not one of the two people involved then just.. I dunno, try to talk him round. But if it doesn't work, then there's nothing more you can do.
    Yeah I put the thread up before but it got put down for some reason. It's getting worse so I wrote one again.

    His ex is getting on with her final year at A levels and she doesn't mention him unless it's to address how *****y he's being.

    I'm wondering why he's being like that. If other people can guide me in the right direction and give suggestions as to why he's being like that, maybe I can talk to him.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Yeah I put the thread up before but it got put down for some reason. It's getting worse so I wrote one again.

    His ex is getting on with her final year at A levels and she doesn't mention him unless it's to address how *****y he's being.

    I'm wondering why he's being like that. If other people can guide me in the right direction and give suggestions as to why he's being like that, maybe I can talk to him.
    I see. I am sorry that I can't answer your question.

    But I would say focus on your A-levels, don't address him for any reason whatsoever and try to move on.
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    (Original post by SeanFM)
    I see. I am sorry that I can't answer your question.

    But I would say focus on your A-levels, don't address him for any reason whatsoever and try to move on.
    I'm at uni haha.

    He's my best friend so we're going to end up talking sooner or later.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I'm at uni haha.

    He's my best friend so we're going to end up talking sooner or later.
    :lol: with that move, I'm afraid you have given yourself away.

    :dontknow: ex and best friend.. I'm sure down the line you could be best friends but if you're not completely over him and.. well, who knows what's going on over on his end, then it's just going to be messy, painful and boring.
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    (Original post by SeanFM)
    :lol: with that move, I'm afraid you have given yourself away.

    :dontknow: ex and best friend.. I'm sure down the line you could be best friends but if you're not completely over him and.. well, who knows what's going on over on his end, then it's just going to be messy, painful and boring.
    Erm have I..?

    He's not my ex. He's my best friend who broke up with someone else and he's changed ever since.
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    Seems like hes missing her init and the one night stands don't fill the empty cracks in his heart ha ha
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    (Original post by samina_ay)
    Seems like hes missing her init and the one night stands don't fill the empty cracks in his heart ha ha
    I actually mentioned this to him and he was like, "Oh I love my life it's great without her, she was a nightmare to be with etc etc"
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Erm have I..?

    He's not my ex. He's my best friend who broke up with someone else and he's changed ever since.
    It was just that I was talking to someone recently that said 'haha' like that.

    I'm afraid I am being useless here but good luck
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I actually mentioned this to him and he was like, "Oh I love my life it's great without her, she was a nightmare to be with etc etc"
    He won't openly admit that he misses her lmao
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    (Original post by Anonymous;[url="tel:63613215")
    63613215[/url]]I'm at uni haha.

    He's my best friend so we're going to end up talking sooner or later.
    I know who this involves.
    He's a c***. Yeah, he may have been ok before but his actions have been brutal and thoughtless. Immature af.

    If i an wrong on who this concerns (which is highly doubt) then....
    The guy might grow out of this 'phase' and he hasn't moved on. He is literally 'drowning his sorrows'.
    Kid might come good but i'd always be wary of him going forwards. I know he was your 'best friend' but he is showing his true colours to some extent...

    Edit: turns out i'm wrong here. I do not know the people concerned. Whoops...
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    It seems as if he's missing her and he's going through an angry stage as he tries to come to terms with the breakup. Calmly explain to him how immature you think he's being, and if he still doesn't change then just leave him to it and when he realises he's acting like an idiot he'll stop.
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    (Original post by Unistudent77)
    I know who this involves.
    He's a c***. Yeah, he may have been ok before but his actions have been brutal and thoughtless. Immature af.

    If i an wrong on who this concerns (which is highly doubt) then....
    The guy might grow out of this 'phase' and he hasn't moved on. He is literally 'drowning his sorrows'.
    Kid might come good but i'd always be wary of him going forwards. I know he was your 'best friend' but he is showing his true colours to some extent...

    Edit: turns out i'm wrong here. I do not know the people concerned. Whoops...
    He is being very immature and I've told him that but idk why he isn't being honest. He's been honest to me about everything apart from this.

    I know who you are talking about and all I can say is, I hope the guy realises that he had a good woman and that he gave it up for a few flings.
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    (Original post by georgiaswift)
    It seems as if he's missing her and he's going through an angry stage as he tries to come to terms with the breakup. Calmly explain to him how immature you think he's being, and if he still doesn't change then just leave him to it and when he realises he's acting like an idiot he'll stop.
    I told him when he first started *****ing about her that he was being immature but he told me to stay out of it. When we had our fight, I called him immature again and he said how his life was amazing without his ex etc.

    I am thinking of leaving it to him but tbh he's being fake. He isn't like this normally at all. When he was with her, he was much happier and more confident in himself. Now, he just talks about how uni relationships are a waste of time.
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    (Original post by Anonymous;[url="tel:63614197")
    63614197[/url]]He is being very immature and I've told him that but idk why he isn't being honest. He's been honest to me about everything apart from this.

    I know who you are talking about and all I can say is, I hope the guy realises that he had a good woman and that he gave it up for a few flings.
    Pride? He can't admit it due to pride...
    Idk really, only he does. Why do people change, it always makes me think 'were they always so genuine previously?' The answer i have found is usually 'no' thus far. That may not apply to your case though...

    Yeah, he's a w***er from what i can tell.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I told him when he first started *****ing about her that he was being immature but he told me to stay out of it. When we had our fight, I called him immature again and he said how his life was amazing without his ex etc.

    I am thinking of leaving it to him but tbh he's being fake. He isn't like this normally at all. When he was with her, he was much happier and more confident in himself. Now, he just talks about how uni relationships are a waste of time.
    He's hurting a lot and people say things they don't mean when they're upset. Let him ride it out and eventually he'll be back to normal, he just needs to overcome it on his own. If he doesn't, then there's nothing you can do.
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    Just rebound behaviour. Let him get on with it and out of his system. he just sounds a bit lost. Just let him know you are sorry you arent speaking and he knows where you are. Good for you for sticking up for his ex in that way.
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    (Original post by Unistudent77)
    Pride? He can't admit it due to pride...
    Idk really, only he does. Why do people change, it always makes me think 'were they always so genuine previously?' The answer i have found is usually 'no' thus far. That may not apply to your case though...

    Yeah, he's a w***er from what i can tell.
    Pride and maybe because he can be weak willed at times.
    I asked him why he changed and he said that he loved the new him and how it was so much better. My best friend is unrecognisable.

    Yeah he is.. He had this air of arrogance when he made that thread about her.. She's too nice and too pretty for him imo.

    (Original post by georgiaswift)
    He's hurting a lot and people say things they don't mean when they're upset. Let him ride it out and eventually he'll be back to normal, he just needs to overcome it on his own. If he doesn't, then there's nothing you can do.
    He was absolutely horrible about his ex. He didn't show any remorse or anything.
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    Tbh OP you seem jealous


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