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    (Original post by thefatone)
    By the way when i say he buys too much this is what i mean


    everyone has told him not to buy ice cream an actimel because we can afford it. It's not cheap and we can just throw money around willy nilly. Also we have too much in the freezer aswell. As you can see the fridge is mainly full apart from that little middle section but why do we always need a full fridge at all times? Just another picture of more vegetables and fruit which is unnecessary since we have enough at home already. Basically our family could go off the stuff we had for about another week before really needing to shop. I see no point in buying all this stuff. Who's eating it all? certainly not me. It's always leftovers for breakfast which i don't want. I want to have something normal like cereal or something. He always cooks too much aswell which is part of the problem.

    Anyway as you can all see he just buys too much. Just wanted to bring to your attention what i meant by pointless shopping and carelessly spends all the money we saved up by buying cheap stuff and getting only necessities.

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    Why don't you accept things as they are now?

    I would rather buy food and have full fridge for my family than having to pay off this debt - this is how your father can see things.

    That's just one example.

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    (Original post by Impressive)
    Why don't you accept things as they are now?

    I would rather buy food and have full fridge for my family than having to pay off this debt - this is how your father can see things.

    That's just one example.

    Posted from TSR Mobile
    1. Because there's better things he could be doing than increasing expenditure. Such as looking for a part time job or something that brings in money even if it's just a little bit.

    2. i'd rather pay off debt because that only increases over time whereas food, it's not necessary to have a fridge full of it.
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    Ive tries to explain to you his mindset. he isnt all there at the moment and you wont change his mind. annoying I know. Focus on school.
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    I agree with 999tigger - you need to focus on the things which are currently within your power to change.

    You can't change your father or your family's finances. What you can do is pour your focus and energy into your studies, get the best possible results you can, so that you dan help your family in the longer term.

    Even if you managed to get a job, at your age, you wouldn't earn enough to make a dent in what's happening.
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    (Original post by thefatone)
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    I know what you mean, for me I have a single parent and he can't work bc he has to be a full time parent to my lil sis and cares for my elderly grandad he's always complaining how he never has enough money and then carelessly buys a whole load of food that no one likes. You know what, you have to take charge especially considering he's putting your family in debt-- he has to understand it's not just about him, what he does reflects on to you. I know taking charge is easier said than done, but when your dad goes shopping you can try to go with him and as he's putting extra useless stuff in take it out, or write a list before you go so you only get essential things so he doesn't wander of in the dairy section and grabs 3 bottles of milk. Hope this helped and sorry for the late reply, just saw this now!
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    (Original post by 999tigger)
    Ive tries to explain to you his mindset. he isnt all there at the moment and you wont change his mind. annoying I know. Focus on school.
    the only mindset he has is everyone else is wrong i'm right, i have authority i can use it.
    (Original post by Klix88)
    I agree with 999tigger - you need to focus on the things which are currently within your power to change.

    You can't change your father or your family's finances. What you can do is pour your focus and energy into your studies, get the best possible results you can, so that you dan help your family in the longer term.

    Even if you managed to get a job, at your age, you wouldn't earn enough to make a dent in what's happening.
    i agree but i need to move on with my life so i can help myself so i can possibly help my family
    (Original post by hideNfreak)
    I know what you mean, for me I have a single parent and he can't work bc he has to be a full time parent to my lil sis and cares for my elderly grandad he's always complaining how he never has enough money and then carelessly buys a whole load of food that no one likes. You know what, you have to take charge especially considering he's putting your family in debt-- he has to understand it's not just about him, what he does reflects on to you. I know taking charge is easier said than done, but when your dad goes shopping you can try to go with him and as he's putting extra useless stuff in take it out, or write a list before you go so you only get essential things so he doesn't wander of in the dairy section and grabs 3 bottles of milk. Hope this helped and sorry for the late reply, just saw this now!
    i can't because i don't know when he's going to shop, i ask him where he's going he just says outside elsewhere then he comes back with shopping.
    again it doesn't matter he just wants to fill the fridge it's not really good because we can last off all the stuff we had already for a week at max
    my mom has told him don't buy xxx but he never listen and just buys xxx anyway
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    You overestimate your ability to influnce things in the world.
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    (Original post by thefatone)
    i agree but i need to move on with my life so i can help myself so i can possibly help my family
    In your situation, moving on with your life will mean letting go of the idea that you can in any way resolve your family's current crisis. The energy being wasted on worrying about it can be poured into your studies. Good results now will mean a brighter future - both for you and your family.

    If your father won't listen to your mother, he certainly won't listen to you. He clearly has a problem which is beyond either of you to resolve. You need to accept that he isn't worth the time and worry you're spending on him.
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    (Original post by Klix88)
    In your situation, moving on with your life will mean letting go of the idea that you can in any way resolve your family's current crisis. The energy being wasted on worrying about it can be poured into your studies. Good results now will mean a brighter future - both for you and your family.

    If your father won't listen to your mother, he certainly won't listen to you. He clearly has a problem which is beyond either of you to resolve. You need to accept that he isn't worth the time and worry you're spending on him.
    i guess... working on my physics and chem which i suck at....

    i know but we can't just ignore it because it's hurts the rest of the family because he directs all his menial problems at the family. for example he might ask me to come over and spell a word for him when he's on his phone, he has a spell checker and he has a dictionary right next to him
 
 
 
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