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How many nights a week do you spend with your bf/gf?
Hey.
I just wondered if you live separate from your bf/gf, how many nights do you stay at each others houses?
Me and my bf stay at each others houses about 3/4 times a week. I hate it when we're apart but I understamd he needs his space even though I hate it. I was with him last night and we're not gonna see each other now till Saturday. I was quite upset so he said we might see each other Friday night.
We nearly broke up in January because we spent the first year with each other practically every day. I just feel like he doesn't love me or wants to see me when we're apart for a few days. It's cos i'm so insecure etc I know that but I don't know how to stop myself from feeling like this. We've been together for just over a year and a half now.
The second we're apart I start feeling really miserable, scared we're gonna split up or he's cheating on me etc. I know it's crazy but I can't help it. When we chat though or see each other, I know he loves me loads and I think to myself I'm being so silly cos it's obvious he loves me.
Helppppppp!
I just wondered if you live separate from your bf/gf, how many nights do you stay at each others houses?
Me and my bf stay at each others houses about 3/4 times a week. I hate it when we're apart but I understamd he needs his space even though I hate it. I was with him last night and we're not gonna see each other now till Saturday. I was quite upset so he said we might see each other Friday night.
We nearly broke up in January because we spent the first year with each other practically every day. I just feel like he doesn't love me or wants to see me when we're apart for a few days. It's cos i'm so insecure etc I know that but I don't know how to stop myself from feeling like this. We've been together for just over a year and a half now.
The second we're apart I start feeling really miserable, scared we're gonna split up or he's cheating on me etc. I know it's crazy but I can't help it. When we chat though or see each other, I know he loves me loads and I think to myself I'm being so silly cos it's obvious he loves me.
Helppppppp!
Scroll to see replies
Reply 1
I think it was you I said this to before. You seem too dependent on your boyfriend. Learn to be your own person again. He is a part of your life, he isn't your life completely.
Reply 2
I haven't spent the night with my bf for over a week and won't until Friday.. there is a distance factor! I don't like it that I can't be there when he needs me and vice-versa but we cope 
Reply 3
My boyfriend spend either one or two nights a week together when we're at college. When it's the holidays, and he isn't working maybe three times.
Every relationship is different though. Some people need a lot more space than others, but some people can live in each others pockets and don't even bother. Distance is a good thing in my opinion, whenever i'm going to meet my boyfriend I get excited, butterflies, nerves. It's madness but because i've not seen him in maybe a week it gets to me.
Spending time apart and doing your own thing is important too. Once you start dating someone it's very easy to get caught up in your relationship and lose a bit of your own identity. It's okay to spend lots of time together, but it's good for you to get out there meet new people and catch up with some old friends.
Honestly, it's obvious your boyfriend needs space and you need to respect that. You might want to be around him all the time, but your relationship just can't handle that if you two nearly broke up. Do things apart, do things together. Try and get a good balance and become more independent.
Every relationship is different though. Some people need a lot more space than others, but some people can live in each others pockets and don't even bother. Distance is a good thing in my opinion, whenever i'm going to meet my boyfriend I get excited, butterflies, nerves. It's madness but because i've not seen him in maybe a week it gets to me.
Spending time apart and doing your own thing is important too. Once you start dating someone it's very easy to get caught up in your relationship and lose a bit of your own identity. It's okay to spend lots of time together, but it's good for you to get out there meet new people and catch up with some old friends.
Honestly, it's obvious your boyfriend needs space and you need to respect that. You might want to be around him all the time, but your relationship just can't handle that if you two nearly broke up. Do things apart, do things together. Try and get a good balance and become more independent.
Reply 4
We spend 6 nights a week together.
Reply 5
How many times have we told you this, everyone needs space in a relationship. You are going to lose him if you keep being like this. Sorry to sound harsh but you are driving him away. I say it again my ex was the same and in the end i'd had enough and dumped her. The same will happen to you.
Recently ive spent loads of time with my boyfriend and haven't been at home much. To the op you seem like you may have low self esteem go out with your friends and stuff when your not with him. It's natrual to miss him/worry ect when your not with him but try to put these thoughts to the back of your head!
Reply 7
My boyfriend is a nurse so he works loads and I'm at uni so there's a distance factor and the fact that we're busy at different times. Having said that, we try and see each other every week. We speak to each other every day. I do miss him, but we cope and I trust him completely.
Reply 9
I see my boyfriend every night, but only stay the night at week ends as he works and im at college
we also go out with friends so were not always in each others shoes
we also go out with friends so were not always in each others shoes
Reply 10
Wow!! I felt so the same as you!! I wish I had read a post like this about a year ago. I lost my relationship with my boyfriend because I was so desperate to spend time with him like everyday. Just like you for the first year we spent everyday together and then i went off to Uni and everything went wrong, I came back from uni and expected him to want to spend time with me every day like we used to. Anyway I got stupidly paranoid and we broke up because of me and my insecurities!
We got back together the other night and I now know that everyone needs their own space. The only way I learnt that was exactly what people are saying to you on here now, you need to be your own person otherwise he will start to feel suffocated and unhappy and your relationship is likely to end. But if you sort it out now you will be ok. If you need any advice on how to be your own person just PM me because I am so much happier. I have sorted my life out and now I have my boyfriend back and everything is great and Im so glad!!
We got back together the other night and I now know that everyone needs their own space. The only way I learnt that was exactly what people are saying to you on here now, you need to be your own person otherwise he will start to feel suffocated and unhappy and your relationship is likely to end. But if you sort it out now you will be ok. If you need any advice on how to be your own person just PM me because I am so much happier. I have sorted my life out and now I have my boyfriend back and everything is great and Im so glad!!
Reply 12
princesshannah1986
Wow!! I felt so the same as you!! I wish I had read a post like this about a year ago. I lost my relationship with my boyfriend because I was so desperate to spend time with him like everyday. Just like you for the first year we spent everyday together and then i went off to Uni and everything went wrong, I came back from uni and expected him to want to spend time with me every day like we used to. Anyway I got stupidly paranoid and we broke up because of me and my insecurities!
We got back together the other night and I now know that everyone needs their own space. The only way I learnt that was exactly what people are saying to you on here now, you need to be your own person otherwise he will start to feel suffocated and unhappy and your relationship is likely to end. But if you sort it out now you will be ok. If you need any advice on how to be your own person just PM me because I am so much happier. I have sorted my life out and now I have my boyfriend back and everything is great and Im so glad!!
We got back together the other night and I now know that everyone needs their own space. The only way I learnt that was exactly what people are saying to you on here now, you need to be your own person otherwise he will start to feel suffocated and unhappy and your relationship is likely to end. But if you sort it out now you will be ok. If you need any advice on how to be your own person just PM me because I am so much happier. I have sorted my life out and now I have my boyfriend back and everything is great and Im so glad!!
I agree
i spend every night with my man. Literally, every single night apart from if one of us is away (which is very rarely!). It's weird because technically we live in different houses (i pay rent on a house i only use as a giant wardrobe) but i prefer it that way because i don't want to feel like i 'live with him' just yet, even though i pretty much do.
I dunno, i think it's just a mental thing, even though we essentially live together, i like to feel like i have my own place that i can go to should i ever need to. It's like a very, very expensive security blanket!
I dunno, i think it's just a mental thing, even though we essentially live together, i like to feel like i have my own place that i can go to should i ever need to. It's like a very, very expensive security blanket!
Reply 16
I live in Enfield and my boyfriend lives in Borehamwood, he also works nights as a barman which is a pain, but we usually spend two nights- Saturday and Sunday night together, but these past few weeks it's only been the one night, because his manager made him work the Saturday
Reply 17
Usualy 2 weekends out of three, and he stays friday-monday, or I stay at his friday-sunday/monday.
I'm an odd one, and often make him feel unloved, because I have a huge need to be on my own sometimes. I recently caused some trouble by saying that I thought we saw a lot of eachother, when in fact we only see eachother once a week at most. My parents have always bought me up to believe in my own independence, and also restraint, and they see (or saw, when I was with my ex) spending every weekend together as decadent, obsessive and unnecessary. Maybe this was true when I was a 'hight flying' A Level student dating an often unemployed school drop out. Seeing him was making my work suffer, and that was the last thing my parents wanted, esp as they were less than fond of him. I'm also someone who feels trapped very easily (another result of my pathetic, overly protective and obsessive ex) and so can happily survive a week or two alone. Of course, I will miss him, and I'll miss him a lot, but it isn't usualy a painful kind of missing. I don't feel any less loved for him not being here. That said, when I do see him, I never want to let him go home because losing him again is always painful . . . call me inconsistent
But when I *do* get lonely, I get pitifuly lonely and then just want to spend my entire life in his arms.
God, I'm so selfish
But, as of the 11th June, we shall be spending nearly every day of the summer together. In September I shall go back to work, as I need to re-save for university, but I hope that he shall be able to spend a lot of time at my house. And then, once we are at uni, we shall be living together, as near as makes no odds. I'm really excited! As I said, I am strange . . . I feel a tad ominous about lots of little visits, but the prospect of actualy living together, and seeing eachother everyday fills me with such excitement! Maybe I am just secretly worried about travel costs? Or maybe I am just a little loopy? Why do people expect me to make sense?
I'm an odd one, and often make him feel unloved, because I have a huge need to be on my own sometimes. I recently caused some trouble by saying that I thought we saw a lot of eachother, when in fact we only see eachother once a week at most. My parents have always bought me up to believe in my own independence, and also restraint, and they see (or saw, when I was with my ex) spending every weekend together as decadent, obsessive and unnecessary. Maybe this was true when I was a 'hight flying' A Level student dating an often unemployed school drop out. Seeing him was making my work suffer, and that was the last thing my parents wanted, esp as they were less than fond of him. I'm also someone who feels trapped very easily (another result of my pathetic, overly protective and obsessive ex) and so can happily survive a week or two alone. Of course, I will miss him, and I'll miss him a lot, but it isn't usualy a painful kind of missing. I don't feel any less loved for him not being here. That said, when I do see him, I never want to let him go home because losing him again is always painful . . . call me inconsistent
But when I *do* get lonely, I get pitifuly lonely and then just want to spend my entire life in his arms.
God, I'm so selfish
But, as of the 11th June, we shall be spending nearly every day of the summer together. In September I shall go back to work, as I need to re-save for university, but I hope that he shall be able to spend a lot of time at my house. And then, once we are at uni, we shall be living together, as near as makes no odds. I'm really excited! As I said, I am strange . . . I feel a tad ominous about lots of little visits, but the prospect of actualy living together, and seeing eachother everyday fills me with such excitement! Maybe I am just secretly worried about travel costs? Or maybe I am just a little loopy? Why do people expect me to make sense?
Schmokie Dragon
Usualy 2 weekends out of three, and he stays friday-monday, or I stay at his friday-sunday/monday.
I'm an odd one, and often make him feel unloved, because I have a huge need to be on my own sometimes. I recently caused some trouble by saying that I thought we saw a lot of eachother, when in fact we only see eachother once a week at most. My parents have always bought me up to believe in my own independence, and also restraint, and they see (or saw, when I was with my ex) spending every weekend together as decadent, obsessive and unnecessary. Maybe this was true when I was a 'hight flying' A Level student dating an often unemployed school drop out. Seeing him was making my work suffer, and that was the last thing my parents wanted, esp as they were less than fond of him. I'm also someone who feels trapped very easily (another result of my pathetic, overly protective and obsessive ex) and so can happily survive a week or two alone. Of course, I will miss him, and I'll miss him a lot, but it isn't usualy a painful kind of missing. I don't feel any less loved for him not being here. That said, when I do see him, I never want to let him go home because losing him again is always painful . . . call me inconsistent
But when I *do* get lonely, I get pitifuly lonely and then just want to spend my entire life in his arms.
God, I'm so selfish
But, as of the 11th June, we shall be spending nearly every day of the summer together. In September I shall go back to work, as I need to re-save for university, but I hope that he shall be able to spend a lot of time at my house. And then, once we are at uni, we shall be living together, as near as makes no odds. I'm really excited! As I said, I am strange . . . I feel a tad ominous about lots of little visits, but the prospect of actualy living together, and seeing eachother everyday fills me with such excitement! Maybe I am just secretly worried about travel costs? Or maybe I am just a little loopy? Why do people expect me to make sense?
I'm an odd one, and often make him feel unloved, because I have a huge need to be on my own sometimes. I recently caused some trouble by saying that I thought we saw a lot of eachother, when in fact we only see eachother once a week at most. My parents have always bought me up to believe in my own independence, and also restraint, and they see (or saw, when I was with my ex) spending every weekend together as decadent, obsessive and unnecessary. Maybe this was true when I was a 'hight flying' A Level student dating an often unemployed school drop out. Seeing him was making my work suffer, and that was the last thing my parents wanted, esp as they were less than fond of him. I'm also someone who feels trapped very easily (another result of my pathetic, overly protective and obsessive ex) and so can happily survive a week or two alone. Of course, I will miss him, and I'll miss him a lot, but it isn't usualy a painful kind of missing. I don't feel any less loved for him not being here. That said, when I do see him, I never want to let him go home because losing him again is always painful . . . call me inconsistent
But when I *do* get lonely, I get pitifuly lonely and then just want to spend my entire life in his arms.
God, I'm so selfish
But, as of the 11th June, we shall be spending nearly every day of the summer together. In September I shall go back to work, as I need to re-save for university, but I hope that he shall be able to spend a lot of time at my house. And then, once we are at uni, we shall be living together, as near as makes no odds. I'm really excited! As I said, I am strange . . . I feel a tad ominous about lots of little visits, but the prospect of actualy living together, and seeing eachother everyday fills me with such excitement! Maybe I am just secretly worried about travel costs? Or maybe I am just a little loopy? Why do people expect me to make sense?
Not at ALL to sound harsh.
But you sound like you don't know what you want.
Again, I don't mean that in any offensive way, what-so-ever.
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