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    I first met this guy about 2 and a half years ago, I did not fancy him when we first met. Over time it was clear we were interested in each other but kept having missed opportunities. I have come to the realisation now that it wasn't meant to be.

    The problem is I have become obsessed and cannot stop thinking about him. I check Facebook and messaging app's to see if he is online. I check the walking group that we go to, to see if he will be there. He is quite wishy washy and will drop out at the last minute.

    When he does come back after months on end and comes to the walks I either get nervous so don't speak to him or avoid him as I feel annoyed he thinks he can come back and try to chat me up when he has been on dating websites in the meantime.

    I get told by people that he is shy but if he is shy how can he be when he goes on dating websites? His friends keep putting in a 'good word' to me but then I don't see him taking action. I am just sick and tired of it all now and wondered how I can forget about this guy. Just fed up of the heartache.
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    How do you know he's been on dating websites? Do you two actually talk regularly or anything like that? If you don't talk to him face to face when you see him at these walks you do, how often and what is your main source of communication with him? If you want to get over him then remove him from your life and try to forget him? It doesn't sound like he offers you or your life anything positive at this point and you've realised "it wasn't meant to be" so why keep him around?

    Also, as a side note, shy people can and do absolutely use dating websites. If anything shy people probably use them more since they might find it harder initiating contact with someone they like irl.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I first met this guy about 2 and a half years ago, I did not fancy him when we first met. Over time it was clear we were interested in each other but kept having missed opportunities. I have come to the realisation now that it wasn't meant to be.

    The problem is I have become obsessed and cannot stop thinking about him. I check Facebook and messaging app's to see if he is online. I check the walking group that we go to, to see if he will be there. He is quite wishy washy and will drop out at the last minute.

    When he does come back after months on end and comes to the walks I either get nervous so don't speak to him or avoid him as I feel annoyed he thinks he can come back and try to chat me up when he has been on dating websites in the meantime.

    I get told by people that he is shy but if he is shy how can he be when he goes on dating websites? His friends keep putting in a 'good word' to me but then I don't see him taking action. I am just sick and tired of it all now and wondered how I can forget about this guy. Just fed up of the heartache.
    With dating websites you chat online which is easier to do than talk to someone you like in real life.
    Also if you are waiting for him to do something why don't you use your initiative and take action there is nothing wrong with him using dating sites as he is not in a relationship with you he is single.
    Also there is an opportunity for you to be with him if that is what you want or are you happy with him finding someone on these sites?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I first met this guy about 2 and a half years ago, I did not fancy him when we first met. Over time it was clear we were interested in each other but kept having missed opportunities. I have come to the realisation now that it wasn't meant to be.

    The problem is I have become obsessed and cannot stop thinking about him. I check Facebook and messaging app's to see if he is online. I check the walking group that we go to, to see if he will be there. He is quite wishy washy and will drop out at the last minute.

    When he does come back after months on end and comes to the walks I either get nervous so don't speak to him or avoid him as I feel annoyed he thinks he can come back and try to chat me up when he has been on dating websites in the meantime.

    I get told by people that he is shy but if he is shy how can he be when he goes on dating websites? His friends keep putting in a 'good word' to me but then I don't see him taking action. I am just sick and tired of it all now and wondered how I can forget about this guy. Just fed up of the heartache.
    I'm in a very similar situation as you! It's nice to see that there is someone else who feels like this. I find myself checking if he's been online way too often and when he's been offline for an extended amount of time I make myself feel awful by assuming he's out with other girls. I literally spend time changing my mind between going to tell him how I feel and being angry with him for not making a move when he was clearly interested at one point. I also know he went on a date with someone else while he liked me so I can't understand what is going on! I can't really offer you any advice but if you want to talk you can message me if you want?
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    (Original post by Swizzel)
    I'm in a very similar situation as you! It's nice to see that there is someone else who feels like this. I find myself checking if he's been online way too often and when he's been offline for an extended amount of time I make myself feel awful by assuming he's out with other girls. I literally spend time changing my mind between going to tell him how I feel and being angry with him for not making a move when he was clearly interested at one point. I also know he went on a date with someone else while he liked me so I can't understand what is going on! I can't really offer you any advice but if you want to talk you can message me if you want?
    Thanks. I might PM you tomorrow. I'm glad someone understands what it is like. That's what I will never understand, if you like someone then why go on dates with a random stranger off a dating website?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Thanks. I might PM you tomorrow. I'm glad someone understands what it is like. That's what I will never understand, if you like someone then why go on dates with a random stranger off a dating website?
    Because you're not together.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Thanks. I might PM you tomorrow. I'm glad someone understands what it is like. That's what I will never understand, if you like someone then why go on dates with a random stranger off a dating website?
    PM me whenever you like! Sometimes talking about things helps!
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    (Original post by Tiger Rag)
    Because you're not together.
    I totally get if your not in a relationship you can date who you like when you like but what I don't get is why not ask the person you actually like out if you're actively dating? It just confuses me! :/
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    (Original post by Swizzel)
    I totally get if your not in a relationship you can date who you like when you like but what I don't get is why not ask the person you actually like out if you're actively dating? It just confuses me! :/
    His whole behaviour has actually made me feel inadequate and low self worth which I now have anxiety as a result. I think I need to rebuild my self esteem and stay away from people who clearly have issues as I don't need that in my life.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    His whole behaviour has actually made me feel inadequate and low self worth which I now have anxiety as a result. I think I need to rebuild my self esteem and stay away from people who clearly have issues as I don't need that in my life.
    It is actually scary how similar our situation is! I definitely feel like that too. It is horrible. I keep telling myself that it's not me with the problem though it's him. I just try to keep telling myself that if its meant to be then something will come of it eventually. I did consider just confessing how I felt but sometimes I feel like all I would achieve by doing that is embarrassment. As I said if your comfortable with me knowing who you are then PM me.
 
 
 
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