hi tsr! this is my first time posting (go easy on me...) but i just wanted some advice from an external source, because, although advice from friends can be good, sometimes it's better to get advice from someone who isn't as familiar.
just before i start... i want to say that, because of my inability to visit a doctor about the way i've been feeling, i've had to resort to self diagnosing. i acknowlege this may not always be right in the sense that just because you've felt a certain way for a certain amount of time, it doesn't necessarily mean you have a mental illness. but in my case, i've had no choice but to do so. i've done my research, i've tried everything, and it all points to depression. in regards to my symptoms, the dots are all connecting and i guess it would be safe for me to say that i am suffering with depression. however, it's past the point (in terms of how long i've felt this way) of it just being classed as sadness. i hope you can all understand.
i'm 15 years old. i've been battling with depression for close to 4 years now. it started when i was around the age of 11, i was having severe issues at home with my parents and on top of that, with people at school and as a result, i became depressed.
now, i'm in year 11 and i'm pretty frightened. as you all probably know, i only have around 4 weeks left til my exams start on may 16th and i'm feeling at quite a loss. my easter break just finished today and i'm going back to school tomorrow but for these last few weeks... everything seems to be going downhill. i've slipped back into a really damaging spiral and i don't know what to do. i try to get as much sleep as possible, i also try to eat as healthily as possible but things just seem to get worse. i need to go to the doctors but when the time comes that i can, in fact, go alone, it'll be way too late (my birthday is very very close to the first exam which really doesn't help at all) and my relationship with both parents, and other family members, for that matter, isn't the greatest. i do have a few good friends but whenever i talk to them about this, they always have a somewhat dismissive attitude towards me. i understand that they perhaps don't understand what it's like to be suffering with depression (and even for the sake of them understanding, i really wouldn't wish this upon anyone else) but sometimes the advice they give seems like something they'd give to someone who was just feeling temporarily sad, like "it's just a bad day... we all get bad days" and "it'll be over tomorrow"... but what can i do.
anyway, in terms of studying... i'm finding it increasingly difficult to sit down and concentrate. my phone is off, i dont have a computer, i minimise distractions but yet i cant concentrate. i always feel pathetic because there are people out there going through worse things than i am and they still manage to succeed but yet i can barely even get out of bed some mornings, it's sometimes too exhausting to even do the simplest of things, and it's becoming worse and worse by the day. i'm just scared all the time, scared that i'll fail but i never seem to do anything about it. my grades right now are okay but really, more than anything, i'm scared of letting people down, after they had such high hopes for me, i had to go and mess things up. i also often think that, under normal circumstances, my life is alright. i have a place to live, a bed to sleep in, food, clean water, and again, there are people living in worse conditions but they seem to be fine (maybe not on the inside but they sure know how to hide it). some days i think about how lucky i am to have something as precious as an education and how people die around the world just to get the change to go to school, and frankly, it makes me feel worse. this is going to sound really pathetic but my future just looks so bleak. i can hardly get through the day let alone a week. and i really, really don't know what to do anymore.
sorry for this really long post... at around halfway i got a bit carried away. i hope you can understand me... i also hope you can offer me some sort of help or advice... anything will be much appreciated. thank you for taking your time to read this. also, if you have been in a situation like i'm in, it would be so helpful if you were to give me a few words of advice on how you managed to get through this point in your life.
(i'm not sure if this was the right place to post this seeing as this post is, not only about mental health, but about gcses. i'm not too sure how to redirect threads or anything because this is also my first time on any sort of forum... haha. also... if there are any grammatical/spelling errors, my apologies, i'm writing this on my phone and the page setup isn't the greatest)
struggling with depression at 15... please help :( Watch
- Thread Starter
Last edited by Interrobang; 18-04-2016 at 20:36.
- 11-04-2016 20:36
Offline21ReputationRep:TSR Support TeamClearing and Applications Advisor
- TSR Support Team
- Clearing and Applications Advisor
- 22-04-2016 10:57
- 22-04-2016 11:06
I warmly recommend investigating whether your school offers a counselling service: talking things through confidentially with an objective third party is a really good way to find a new perspective on your feelings. I've experienced periods of depression, and in turn, my 14yo has too: just having space to vent and be heard by someone else is tremendously powerful, and worked for us.
The fact that you recognise that this is "a point" in your life, ie. a transitional phase rather than a permanent condition, is hugely positive. A period of counselling will help you to deconstruct the issues, and assemble a solution that works for you.Last edited by DrSocSciences; 22-04-2016 at 11:11.
- 22-04-2016 11:38
Can i just say first, that you sound incredibly sweet and mature for a 15 year old! And actually a lot of what you said proves that you're already on the right path, you're recognising what you have and you're deciding to do something about it.
I've recently come out of a depressive episode myself, so i definitely do emphasise with what you're describing. You're right, lots of people do go through this and get through it eventually. I personally got out of mine by myself, somehow - I guess it wasn't as bad as many other people's. I would have given you some tips on how to get out of it yourself if yours had only lasted for a few weeks or months, for example. However considering you've had it for 4 whole years, i'd recommend professional help. See a counsellor at school, apply for a therapist through the NHS, or open up to your parents about this and see who they can get you to.
Alternatives: 7 Cups of Tea, a website for support for this kind of thing, otherwise something like Samaritans
If you want some tips on how to overcome this in the meantime before you see someone, you can PM me, or if you want to ask me anything at all - please go ahead
P.S. Don't be so hard on yourself. True, you are lucky for having a roof over your head and food, and yes other people are in a lot worse conditions, but depression doesn't discriminate. It's a disease - just like cancer. It can happen to anybody no matter how rich or poor you are. Don't feel guilty about it
Online19Very Important Poster
- Very Important Poster
- 22-04-2016 11:53
You need to speak to someone, becayse you cnat really get help without doing so. Self care is not really going to crack it. Teacher, parent or school counselor.
You should really consider you GP. You dont say why you cant go, but they can diagnose you and then arrange for you to see a counselor.
In the meantime you cna try childline on 08001111 to talk to somone in confidence on there,
Its natural to get stressed before exams, but worrying makes it harder and achieves nothing. You would be better trying to focus, have a revision timetable to make the most of the days remianining and do regular amounts of study including past papers.
Try and eat a balanced diet, not just junk. Go for a walk and take regular breaks from study. Revise in 1hr or 30 minute sessions take a 10-15 min break inbetween. If you cnat revise then you simply must see someone else, because you cnat sort it out by yourself. talking to someone will take away a lot of stress.