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    my life has no meaning or point to it. I just 'exist,' with nothing here for me.
    i can't be bothered to look after myself, so i don't wash my hair regularly or anything like that. so I come down with colds very regularly.
    during term time it is okay, as I just shelter myself from life via work, but I suffer extreme anxiety in regards to my work.
    in the holidays when I have to do coursework I make myself feel physically sick.
    and then in my free time, I just lie in be and do nothing. I see no point in arranging to meet up with friends, go shopping or go to parties (all stuff which normal teenagers do)
    I constantly feel tired and worn down. my parents don't listen. I am so fed up with just 'existing,' I think I may have depression.
    I don't know what to do, I know suicide isn't the right choice. but I feel so worn down, pointless and depressed.
    I just want to be saved.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    .
    this may sound cliche but maybe keep doing what makes you happy?

    tbh I struggled 'existing' before, and there are many avenues to flee our depression. I found mine through spirituality.

    since you mentioned something serious there, then I suggest getting in touch with a professional to help you with your case?
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    I have had this complete experience, I am currently in year 11, and i had near to 8 months off due to being seriously ill with my mental health. ( Anxiety, panic disorder, depression etc). I would put so much pressure on myself to do my work i would physically throw up, have panic attacks and stuff like that, my mood was beyond low and i had extremely bad thoughts. I wouldn't be able to even leave my front door without having panic attack after panic attack. I was then referred to CBT ( cognitive behaviour therapy) which didn't help me too much but it's one of those things that either helps you or doesn't, and i am now on medication, and i am leaving the house daily for hours on end and i am doing things i could never of imagined, i am back to school now even though i am partly home schooled. What you have to understand is no matter how much work you have, you cannot avoid having a social life, because that will only make you feel worse, and the worst thing you can do is sit in your room and just over think everything because it does not make you feel good at all. You also need to make sure you're not over working, you deserve breaks completely, YOUR MENTAL HEALTH COMES FIRST. I constantly had suicidal thoughts because who would want to live the life of someone who felt constantly nauseous and crying all the time, i was so mentally ill that it tore me down physically, i couldn't sleep, i couldn't eat...You need to seek help, because me seeking help was the best thing i ever did, it has made me a better, happier person than i was before. You are strong, you are worthy, and everything you're feeling is horrible i know, but you will make it through i promise. Speak to a GP, or anyone at school or someone you trust. Also set yourself realistic goals, like getting up and getting ready and going on a 5 minute walk and then slowly make it longer each time. It takes time and patience, also use distraction methods to keep your mind off thinking of negative things, like colouring in or doing something that takes a lot of concentration.I used to not even wash for days on end because i didn't feel the energy or motivation or need to, but you have to take care of yourself because it will only make you feel worse. I hope this helps, just speak to someone about it and i'm sure that will start you off feeling better.
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    Talk to your GP and you'll most probably be given meds, also ask if you could get therapy (psychotherapy/CBT). The thing with therapy is that you have to be willing and determined to work with your therapist.
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    Work on your general and brain health.

    - Get into a sensible sleep routine. Sleep enough. 7-8 hours a night. Regular schedule.

    - Eat very well. Particularly eat the right stuff for the brain, e.g. mackerel, nuts, blueberries. Take a multivitamin.

    - Give up worrying completely. It is a waste of time, and depletes brain neurotransmitters. When you get a bad thought, just clench your fist (or raise your hand) and change your thought, wait for the bad thought to go. Never dwell on a bad thought, just eliminate them ruthlessly.

    - Give up alcohol.

    - Get some hobbies.

    - Get some reasonably intense exercise. Cycling is good.

    - Develop a routine.

    - Don't over do it.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    my life has no meaning or point to it. I just 'exist,' with nothing here for me.
    i can't be bothered to look after myself, so i don't wash my hair regularly or anything like that. so I come down with colds very regularly.
    during term time it is okay, as I just shelter myself from life via work, but I suffer extreme anxiety in regards to my work.
    in the holidays when I have to do coursework I make myself feel physically sick.
    and then in my free time, I just lie in be and do nothing. I see no point in arranging to meet up with friends, go shop
    I don't know what to do, I know suicide isn't the right choice. but I feel so worn down, pointless and depressed.
    I just want to be saved.
    Hey there, lovely.

    Thank you so much for opening up and sharing your story with us, it must have taken an insane amount of courage, and I'm so glad that you did.

    Admitting what's wrong, identifying the problem, and wanting to change is so important, in my experience it's half the battle. Your life can and will change, I promise.

    It sounds like you've struggled with suicidal ideation and depression for a long while now, and that's really not fair on you. It gets in the way of your life, and it stops you having the life you want to have.

    There are lots of things that you could do that could help make things better, but the first one is to believe that you deserve to be happy. And I can categorically promise that you do. Without a shadow of a doubt, you deserve to be happy.

    You speak about wanting to be saved, and I understand that completely. When you feel so low, so down all the time, you just want it to end, you just want to get better again. But the secret is, you can save yourself. You don't need anyone else, because you are enough. You hear me? You are enough, and you always have been.

    I really hope that you can summon the strength soon to talk to your doctor or a university counselling service. If you feel uncomfortable speaking, you can write down how you feel. Whatever it takes to get your feelings across, because your feelings are valid.

    I know you can't see it right now, but you have an incredibly bright and brilliant future, and please feel free to message me if you want to <3

    All my love,
    Miss D
 
 
 
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