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    When I come on here all I read about is people feeling depressed and lonely and dropping out of uni and I end up feeling a bit down too.
    I am very apprehensive about uni as I am quite shy - can anybody share some positive experiences that don't make me feel so worried? Thank you!
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    (Original post by a-98)
    When I come on here all I read about is people feeling depressed and lonely and dropping out of uni and I end up feeling a bit down too.
    I am very apprehensive about uni as I am quite shy - can anybody share some positive experiences that don't make me feel so worried? Thank you!
    Sorry you've only seen people who are having a hard time, one of the things about TSR is people often come here for support when they're feeling down or struggling, happy students who are having a great time often don't need us! We definitely do need more uni positivity though, so I'll share my experience.

    Although I have never been particularly shy, I was very homesick when I first started uni, which as a consequence turned me into the shyest person on the planet. I spent the first two days locked in my room with the door closed with no desire whatsoever to speak to my new flatmates. They all turned out to be great, and reached out to me when they realised I wasn't getting involved, and made sure that I was invited to things in the first couple of days. People are generally nice, and everyone is very excited at the start of uni and will be looking forward to meeting new people, which will include you. Everyone has bad times and wants to go home at some point, that's just the way uni is. Living away from home is difficult and it's fine to need support or advice along the way, but for the vast majority these feelings come and go very quickly and they go back to spending time with their friends and enjoying their courses.

    It's fine to be a shy person, being shy doesn't mean you won't enjoy university at all, and you definitely don't have to become a new, confident person if you don't want to. There will be other shy people there, and other people who share your interests. Uni is one of those amazing places where you will find all types of people so don't worry about not fitting in.
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    That makes me feel a lot better! Thank you! Do most people get on with their flatmates - all I'm reading about it people with awful ones!
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    (Original post by a-98)
    When I come on here all I read about is people feeling depressed and lonely and dropping out of uni and I end up feeling a bit down too.
    I am very apprehensive about uni as I am quite shy - can anybody share some positive experiences that don't make me feel so worried? Thank you!
    University is completely different for everyone. You're not going to hear the many success stories where nobody has anything to complain about because they have nothing to reach out for.
    Yes, university is daunting. For most people it's their first experience of independence, possibly their first time finding a job, they won't be moving with other people they know... It's scary.

    But there are ways to help you settle in which I really recommend:
    - Join groups on Facebook for your university, course and accommodation and post looking for people you'll be living with or in lectures with. Getting to know someone online before you meet them can make introductions much easier. I managed to find 6 people on my course and 2 people in my flat before I moved to uni, which made saying hello on day 1 much easier! I also found two coursemates on this very wesite, so create a thread for your course in the correct university area for people to find.
    - Be the first to do everything. Make sure you move into your accommodation first so you can greet people as they arrive. Friendships are best made when you're the only two in the flat! Same applies with lectures - two of you in th theatre on the first day gives you the excuse to sit and chat before everyone else arrives.
    - Go to every open day on offer. Getting to know the uni campus and a little bit of the city/surroundings is much easier to do before you move, and it's one less thing to get your head around when you get there! You might also meet coursemates on open days for your course or subject area.
    - Get involved. When you arrive, you'll have leaflets thrown at you. Take them away and sit down and sort through them. They will enlighten you to so many opportunities, some of which might be useful in a year or so and not straight away. I really recommend getting involved with sports or societies because you'll be encouraged to socialise, keep fit, and make friends from an array of different courses but who still share an interest with you! If you horse ride at home or ski with family then prioritise these, but also don't be afraid to try something new.
    - Get organised. Search the internet for things you'll need to take with you but might forget. For instance, taking a doorstop for day 1 is recommended so your rooms looks more inviting for people to stick their head in and say hello. Also, cake goes down well! Also take a few comforting recipes from home to start you off, and don't be afraid to take some decor for your room which will make you feel at home.

    I hope some of that helps? I might have just made you 10x more nervous.. But my point is there's so much on offer at university that you can't be prepared enough! It's such an exciting time!

    Also... Focus on revision until after your exams, and then get your uni head on
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    (Original post by a-98)
    That makes me feel a lot better! Thank you! Do most people get on with their flatmates - all I'm reading about it people with awful ones!
    Living with flatmates is always difficult, as most people are used to living with their families for their whole lives so far. There will always be tension and people who don't get on all the time when people are randomly placed together, but as long as you are open minded you should be fine. Everyone is learning how to live away from their parents and you will all help each other to learn these skills. 2nd and 3rd year are much better as you can choose who you live with, and make sure you're with people who have similar lifestyles to you.
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    Anything else guys?
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    I was quite shy when I first started uni, and this made me so nervous as you hear about uni being filled with parties.

    I think the most important thing that will influence your experience is the friends you meet.

    I was lucky to meet a group of amazing friends who were all very similar in nature to me and were on my course. So we could go to the library together and shop etc

    My friends really helped to bring me out of my shell and i am definitely a more improved version of myself than 2 years ago.

    Hope this helps !
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    (Original post by a-98)
    That makes me feel a lot better! Thank you! Do most people get on with their flatmates - all I'm reading about it people with awful ones!
    My flat got on pretty well. I sort of drifted away from them since I didn't have much in common but I generally enjoyed living with them at the time. We spent many hours just sitting around chatting or playing music or watching DVDS. We also attracted people from other flats, at least two people virtually moved into ours during their free time.

    There was one girl who had terrible flatmates, international students who barely spoke English and some people who only spoke to people on their course. But she recognised this in Fresher's week, and took the opportunity to meet other people: she literally came up to our group when we were about to go to one of the Fresher's welcome pub sessions together and said 'Can I come with you guys, my flatmates aren't very nice' and just like that she became an honorary member of our flat and had a great year. Although ironically she pulled out of living with us the following year because she said she wanted to live with people on her own course, but that was probably because she wanted to actually get some work done rather than sit around having fun.

    We also used to go on flat outings every couple of weeks, to various historical attractions and other things. We went to a couple of TV recordings at ITV studios which was cool. We went to the recording of the ITV New Year programme, which was basically a party where they handed out free drinks to everyone, and there was comedy from Jimmy Carr and Jack Whitehall, and music from Bruno Mars, all performing to literally less than 100 of us. One of the stand out memories from uni.
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    (Original post by Copperknickers)
    My flat got on pretty well. I sort of drifted away from them since I didn't have much in common but I generally enjoyed living with them at the time. We spent many hours just sitting around chatting or playing music or watching DVDS. We also attracted people from other flats, at least two people virtually moved into ours during their free time.

    There was one girl who had terrible flatmates, international students who barely spoke English and some people who only spoke to people on their course. But she recognised this in Fresher's week, and took the opportunity to meet other people: she literally came up to our group when we were about to go to one of the Fresher's welcome pub sessions together and said 'Can I come with you guys, my flatmates aren't very nice' and just like that she became an honorary member of our flat and had a great year. Although ironically she pulled out of living with us the following year because she said she wanted to live with people on her own course, but that was probably because she wanted to actually get some work done rather than sit around having fun.

    We also used to go on flat outings every couple of weeks, to various historical attractions and other things. We went to a couple of TV recordings at ITV studios which was cool. We went to the recording of the ITV New Year programme, which was basically a party where they handed out free drinks to everyone, and there was comedy from Jimmy Carr and Jack Whitehall, and music from Bruno Mars, all performing to literally less than 100 of us. One of the stand out memories from uni.
    That sounds great, so much fun!
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    99% of people really enjoy uni in the end, I think. Student room isn't exactly representative.

    Loads of people get on with their flatmates really well at first then fall out later when they find other people they like more than the first half dozen they happened to meet at uni- but this isn't a big deal it just happens and it's not worth stressing about.

    I personally discovered that I loved clubbing having never been before and barely having touched alcohol in my life before I came to uni.

    It's not hard to get to know people in the first few weeks- everyone is really really sociable because they're all in the same situation...
    You say hi, ask people their name, their course and which part of the country they're from. Then when you see them again you both awkwardly try and remember the answers from last time and fail but it doesn't matter because you've both made the same mistake. Repeat x1000 for three weeks until you actually know loads of people. Piece of cake
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    (Original post by a-98)
    When I come on here all I read about is people feeling depressed and lonely and dropping out of uni and I end up feeling a bit down too.
    I am very apprehensive about uni as I am quite shy - can anybody share some positive experiences that don't make me feel so worried? Thank you!
    I'm a 4th year and graduating this year and I can honestly say the past 4 years have been the best years of my life.

    I had quite a rough time at school/6th form where I lived in a tiny town with minimal public transport and other services and had very few friends due to my school being filled with the vilest of people who made fun of me for having eczema and being so shy. I couldn't wait to get to uni to get away from that toxic atmosphere.

    Uni honestly didn't disappoint! I managed to find all my flatmates on Facebook before I moved and it made move in day a lot less awkward having got to know each other a bit as there was none of the "who am I going to be living with nerves". Rather, we were all super excited about meeting each other for real! I didn't manage to meet many coursemates beforehand, but we all bonded really quickly in the first couple weeks of class.

    I've absolutely loved my course, even though I had a bit of a wobbly at the start of my year abroad in China due to homesickness, but overall I've become a stronger, more confident and more competent person. Obviously I still have my eczema, but I couldn't care less about it-I have big patches on my neck that are super visible but no one gives a hoot about it. I've even had people say my confidence is intimidating, which I take as a massive compliment seeing as my confidence prior to uni was so low it was going into negative numbers!

    The best piece of advice I can give you is just get involved. As Charlotte49 said earlier on in the thread, locking yourself away in your room will do you no favours in having a good time at uni-not getting involved is a guaranteed one way ticket to having a terrible time. Don't be afraid to say yes to trying new things-you'll most likely meet really cool people as well as possibly discover something you never knew you'd love.

    Uni's more than just getting the degree at the end of it. While getting a good degree is important, it's also very worthwhile taking part in extra curricular activities, such as summer courses, summer internships and society committees just to name a few. These help develop soft skills that are very well regarded by employers but also help give you a break from intensive study and give you a reason to meet and hang out with new friends outside your flat and course
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    (Original post by super_kawaii)
    I'm a 4th year and graduating this year and I can honestly say the past 4 years have been the best years of my life.

    I had quite a rough time at school/6th form where I lived in a tiny town with minimal public transport and other services and had very few friends due to my school being filled with the vilest of people who made fun of me for having eczema and being so shy. I couldn't wait to get to uni to get away from that toxic atmosphere.

    Uni honestly didn't disappoint! I managed to find all my flatmates on Facebook before I moved and it made move in day a lot less awkward having got to know each other a bit as there was none of the "who am I going to be living with nerves". Rather, we were all super excited about meeting each other for real! I didn't manage to meet many coursemates beforehand, but we all bonded really quickly in the first couple weeks of class.

    I've absolutely loved my course, even though I had a bit of a wobbly at the start of my year abroad in China due to homesickness, but overall I've become a stronger, more confident and more competent person. Obviously I still have my eczema, but I couldn't care less about it-I have big patches on my neck that are super visible but no one gives a hoot about it. I've even had people say my confidence is intimidating, which I take as a massive compliment seeing as my confidence prior to uni was so low it was going into negative numbers!

    The best piece of advice I can give you is just get involved. As Charlotte49 said earlier on in the thread, locking yourself away in your room will do you no favours in having a good time at uni-not getting involved is a guaranteed one way ticket to having a terrible time. Don't be afraid to say yes to trying new things-you'll most likely meet really cool people as well as possibly discover something you never knew you'd love.

    Uni's more than just getting the degree at the end of it. While getting a good degree is important, it's also very worthwhile taking part in extra curricular activities, such as summer courses, summer internships and society committees just to name a few. These help develop soft skills that are very well regarded by employers but also help give you a break from intensive study and give you a reason to meet and hang out with new friends outside your flat and course
    Love this! Thank you so much for sharing this with me - although I have some good friends in sixth form, my confidence is not great either, so it's lovely to hear that yours got such a boost from going to uni!
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    (Original post by a-98)
    When I come on here all I read about is people feeling depressed and lonely and dropping out of uni and I end up feeling a bit down too.
    I am very apprehensive about uni as I am quite shy - can anybody share some positive experiences that don't make me feel so worried? Thank you!
    What uni are you going to and what course? I study business management at Newman university. I was the exact same way about starting uni. At Newman they had this Headstart programme that allowed me to meet people and make new friends outside my course. My confidence increased and I still meet up with these friends. Uni has really helped me grow besides the course. I joined societies and met different people. I am having a positive experience so far. I think it all comes down to balancing work and down time for your self to make the best of it.
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    I am also a shy and quiet person..due to being small :3. I am studying a 3D Games course at Uni and speak to everyone in class, those who actually turn up! However I have only spoken to people in my class/some 1st years from my course.I have only made 'acquaintances' and no good friends as I havent found anyone who shares the same interests. Also the societies suck so have not spoken to other students from different courses. So Uni has not been fantastic socially. yay..bring on summer, doing nothing with nobody like last year . But hope you enjoy uni when you start!
 
 
 
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