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I said my boyfriend could do what he wants on holiday... watch

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    My boyfriend is going abroad on a typical lads holiday this summer- I will also be away.
    He planned this with his friends months before he met me so I said that as it's a lads holiday, he's not been on one before; he can do what he likes. Whatever he wants. As long as he's honest with me...

    now I'm unsure if this was a good thing to say.

    I trust his friends, but I don't know if he'll not give me everything that he did in fear of him hurting me. Yes, I'm sensitive, but I said that he could do what he likes providing he's honest but he's going to get wasted for 99% of it.

    Opinions? .-.

    note: I'm not the person who would say it then be all 'why would you do this to me'. We're both casual. No remarks or whatnot please.
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    I can tell you as a 19 year old male
    On holidays boys will be boys!
    :perv::perv:
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    As its casual are you ok with him sleeping with other people?
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    (Original post by EssB)
    My boyfriend is going abroad on a typical lads holiday this summer- I will also be away.
    He planned this with his friends months before he met me so I said that as it's a lads holiday, he's not been on one before; he can do what he likes. Whatever he wants. As long as he's honest with me...

    now I'm unsure if this was a good thing to say.

    I trust his friends, but I don't know if he'll not give me everything that he did in fear of him hurting me. Yes, I'm sensitive, but I said that he could do what he likes providing he's honest but he's going to get wasted for 99% of it.

    Opinions? .-.

    note: I'm not the person who would say it then be all 'why would you do this to me'. We're both casual. No remarks or whatnot please.
    Stop worrying enjoy yourself too. Thinking too much sometimes can lead to disaster, so trust him
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    (Original post by EssB)
    Opinions?
    Stupid thing to say
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    Like you said, he's gonna be wasted for almost all of it, despite his best attempt at providing you with a honest account is gonna be hard.
    That being said, if you don't mind the fact he's gonna be drunk and wont remember everything, yeah it's fine if that's the arrangement you wanna make.
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    Most probs he'll get on with some random girl or whatever. But on the plus side he's not going to leave you for someone else.
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    (Original post by chikane)
    As its casual are you ok with him sleeping with other people?
    We're monogamous, he was the one who brought up that he is before I even mentioned anything about a relationship.
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    EssB "You can do what you want as long as you're honest."

    Right not sure you meant to word it like that. You probably meant..."ask me before you do something and if I say no, and you go ahead and do it anyway, we're done."
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    He'll be out shagging most nights. Sorry to break it to you.
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    I'd just rather him do what he'd like for a week and be honest with me than do everything behind my back and perhaps bring them up in times of anger and such. I trust him with my life and I want to give him the freedom he'd have had initially because he hadn't met me.
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    (Original post by Cool.nerd)
    EssB "You can do what you want as long as you're honest."

    Right not sure you meant to word it like that. You probably meant..."ask me before you do something and if I say no, and you go ahead and do it anyway, we're done."
    I said he could do what he likes and I'd accept it no matter what. If I'd have said no to anything I'd have gave him a list of what he could and couldn't do..which is a little too controlling for me.
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    (Original post by EssB)
    I said he could do what he likes and I'd accept it no matter what. If I'd have said no to anything I'd have gave him a list of what he could and couldn't do..which is a little too controlling for me.
    Yea I know what you said. My thing is you clearly didn't mean it. Hence thread.
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    (Original post by Cool.nerd)
    Yea I know what you said. My thing is you clearly didn't mean it. Hence thread.
    no... it was literally just asking on the opinion of what I said. I did mean it. He could go out and get 500 women pregnant if he wanted to, but it wouldn't be my problem.
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    (Original post by EssB)
    We're monogamous, he was the one who brought up that he is before I even mentioned anything about a relationship.
    You said you are both casual so i assumed you aren't together in a relationship.
    Maybe you should say you can do anything except mess around with other girls.
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    (Original post by EssB)
    I'd just rather him do what he'd like for a week and be honest with me than do everything behind my back and perhaps bring them up in times of anger and such. I trust him with my life and I want to give him the freedom he'd have had initially because he hadn't met me.
    v. naive imo. The jealousy is going to drive you mad, you're clearly not comfortable with this.
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    (Original post by chikane)
    You said you are both casual so i assumed you aren't together in a relationship.
    Maybe you should say you can do anything except mess around with other girls.
    I'm sorry, I should have been more specific. I'm simply asking if it was an alright thing to say to your boyfriend, I suppose. I don't care if he kisses/'does' whoever he just needs to be.. mindful haha for his own safety.
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    (Original post by EssB)
    no... it was literally just asking on the opinion of what I said. I did mean it. He could go out and get 500 women pregnant if he wanted to, but it wouldn't be my problem.
    (Original post by Wilfred Little)
    v. naive imo. The jealousy is going to drive you mad, you're clearly not comfortable with this.
    But look what she just said
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    I think this is going to set things up for problems later. Are you really going to be okay with it and just move on if he tells you he got intimate with a different girl every night? Are you going to believe him if he says he didn't? My guess is that one or both of those things is going to be an issue. And what happens if he goes on a lads holiday again next year and wants the same deal? Or thinks it'll be cool on a night out because it was fine then? Bear in mind if he does anything you'll have to insist he gets an STD test asap when he gets back.

    Also: shagging a couple of random girls while drunk is not an experience he is going to massively regret not having... it would be crap sex and really meaningless once he was in a long term relationship
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    If you're not bothered.... you wouldn't be asking for opinions...
 
 
 
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