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Never want to see my mum again watch

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    I've not wanted to see them for a long time and as I'm getting older the feeling is stronger and I want to stop all contact with her. The only thing is, if I do it will play on my conscience, not because I will hurt her, but because I know it appears quite cruel in general

    Any advice?
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    Not without more information as to what is going on
    :confused:
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    If you want to cease communication with her because she's a bad influence in your life, then you shouldn't feel guilty about it. If you're simply going through a rough patch, like any family does, I would think twice. Mums are treasures.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I've not wanted to see them for a long time and as I'm getting older the feeling is stronger and I want to stop all contact with her. The only thing is, if I do it will play on my conscience, not because I will hurt her, but because I know it appears quite cruel in general

    Any advice?
    Kevin McAllister wished the same, look what happened to him...

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    (Original post by BookBird)
    If you want to cease communication with her because she's a bad influence in your life, then you shouldn't feel guilty about it. If you're simply going through a rough patch, like any family does, I would think twice. Mums are treasures.
    I wouldn't call it a rough patch as such, she's never shown any compassion or care since I was born and there have been other events since which have escalated the situation throughout my life
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    (Original post by SMEGGGY)
    Kevin McAllister wished the same, look what happened to him...

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    To be honest, it wouldn't bother me

    (I know it sounds harsh but honesty is the best policy)
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    Um that's a bit selfish of you don't you think

    You wouldn't be sat here making a tsr post if it wasn't for her
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I wouldn't call it a rough patch as such, she's never shown any compassion or care since I was born and there have been other events since which have escalated the situation throughout my life
    Then my first point still stands. You shouldn't feel guilty about letting go of people who are toxic to your life, even if they are family. You just have to make sure it's the right decision. x
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    I did this with my dad. I just simply said outright I didn't want to see him any more. He lives a lifestyle I don't agree with and doesn't give a cr*p about me anyway.

    If you really feel you have to do it just tell her.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Um that's a bit selfish of you don't you think

    You wouldn't be sat here making a tsr post if it wasn't for her
    This is such a ridiculous response. Do you think that every mother is loving, caring and wonderful? Just because a woman can give birth to a child, doesn't mean that she can be a mother.
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    People grow apart. If it isn't meant to be then eventually you'll stop contact once you have your own life.

    Think about it, people say that friends are the family you choose. Chances are most people will have friends that they are closer to or consider equal to their family. These friendships do, however, breakdown as people grow. Some breakdown through a particular cause, others break down because the people have grown apart and the relationship has run its course.
    I don't understand how family is an different. You don't choose them, you're stuck with them and sometimes it works out, and other times it doesn't.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Um that's a bit selfish of you don't you think

    You wouldn't be sat here making a tsr post if it wasn't for her
    true but she has had no influence on the person I have become and if anything she has probably brought this upon herself

    (Original post by BookBird)
    Then my first point still stands. You shouldn't feel guilty about letting go of people who are toxic to your life, even if they are family. You just have to make sure it's the right decision. x
    Thank you, you've given me food for thought really appreciated
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    (Original post by Alice__90)
    I did this with my dad. I just simply said outright I didn't want to see him any more. He lives a lifestyle I don't agree with and doesn't give a cr*p about me anyway.

    If you really feel you have to do it just tell her.
    Can I ask did you have any siblings to factor in this? I have a younger sibling, although we both feel the same way, but I'm not sure what effect this will have

    (Original post by Moonstruck16)
    People grow apart. If it isn't meant to be then eventually you'll stop contact once you have your own life.

    Think about it, people say that friends are the family you choose. Chances are most people will have friends that they are closer to or consider equal to their family. These friendships do, however, breakdown as people grow. Some breakdown through a particular cause, others break down because the people have grown apart and the relationship has run its course.
    I don't understand how family is an different. You don't choose them, you're stuck with them and sometimes it works out, and other times it doesn't.
    That's a really good way of looking at it - thank you
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    (Original post by BookBird)
    This is such a ridiculous response. Do you think that every mother is loving, caring and wonderful? Just because a woman can give birth to a child, doesn't mean that she can be a mother.
    Even though she might not express her love, who do you think fed him, wiped his backside and clothed him? His pet goldfish?
    Use your brain and think about these things
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    Do it, dont do it. plenty of kids do. Try not to burn any bridges and make your own way in life. You may feel differently about it later in life, if you ever get kids of your own or you just get a little older. the idea that you are doing it out of a massive sulk or to teach her a lesson becayse she brought it on herself is a bit lame. Shes still your mum, but leave it for now.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Even though she might not express her love, who do you think fed him, wiped his backside and clothed him? His pet goldfish?
    Use your brain and think about these things
    My father actually
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    I'm sorry but have you not gotten over your teen angst yet? What has your mother done anyway?
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    (Original post by 999tigger)
    Do it, dont do it. plenty of kids do. Try not to burn any bridges and make your own way in life. You may feel differently about it later in life, if you ever get kids of your own or you just get a little older. the idea that you are doing it out of a massive sulk or to teach her a lesson becayse she brought it on herself is a bit lame. Shes still your mum, but leave it for now.
    I'm not trying to teach her a lesson. Seeing her as often as I do only reminds me of the things I remember her doing with me and tbh they are not things I want to take with me much longer

    But thank you for replying
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Even though she might not express her love, who do you think fed him, wiped his backside and clothed him? His pet goldfish?
    Use your brain and think about these things
    My mother gave me up to my father when I was a few days/weeks old, turned up again when I was four, disappeared again, then turned up a few years later and caused pure (unwanted) chaos.

    Whilst I'm sure she may 'love' me in some way, the probably looked after me for a grand total of 1% of my life so far and that was with my father involved. I'm an adult now and whilst I wish her no harm, I don't need her in my life. Well she's not part of my life anyway.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I'm not trying to teach her a lesson. Seeing her as often as I do only reminds me of the things I remember her doing with me and tbh they are not things I want to take with me much longer

    But thank you for replying
    then you are an adult and its easy to move away. i cnat see the problem. its less hassle though if you dont burn bridges.
 
 
 
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