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    So I met this 'girl' on Tinder, anyhoo we arranged to meet and turns out she is a he who want's to tie me up and have a threesome with me and his exceptionally hairy mother, so I did what any sane person would do and ran, he's currently chasing me through the streets of Dundee, has anyone got any experience of this kind of situation which you could offer me to help me shake him?
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    (Original post by John55)
    So I met this 'girl' on Tinder, anyhoo we arranged to meet and turns out she is a he who want's to tie me up and have a threesome with me and his exceptionally hairy mother, so I did what any sane person would do and ran, he's currently chasing me through the streets of Dundee, has anyone got any experience of this kind of situation which you could offer me to help me shake him?
    Tell him you are a geezer called John and you lied
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    (Original post by John55)
    So I met this 'girl' on Tinder, anyhoo we arranged to meet and turns out she is a he who want's to tie me up and have a threesome with me and his exceptionally hairy mother, so I did what any sane person would do and ran, he's currently chasing me through the streets of Dundee, has anyone got any experience of this kind of situation which you could offer me to help me shake him?
    Find Ms Pinapple! She will sort him out I'm sure!
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    (Original post by John55)
    So I met this 'girl' on Tinder, anyhoo we arranged to meet and turns out she is a he who want's to tie me up and have a threesome with me and his exceptionally hairy mother, so I did what any sane person would do and ran, he's currently chasing me through the streets of Dundee, has anyone got any experience of this kind of situation which you could offer me to help me shake him?
    Maybe call the police, you have those in Scotland or do you still dance around fires praying to the tree spirits?
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    (Original post by ODES_PDES)
    Tell him you are a geezer called John and you lied
    I'm skinny af though, this dude's mum is more of a geezer than me...
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    (Original post by TheonlyMrsHolmes)
    Find Ms Pinapple! She will sort him out I'm sure!
    ...I'd rather just have this threesome tbh .
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    (Original post by John55)
    So I met this 'girl' on Tinder, anyhoo we arranged to meet and turns out she is a he who want's to tie me up and have a threesome with me and his exceptionally hairy mother, so I did what any sane person would do and ran, he's currently chasing me through the streets of Dundee, has anyone got any experience of this kind of situation which you could offer me to help me shake him?
    Was his name Norman Bates by any chance?
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    What sort of glue do you sniff?
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    (Original post by toronto353)
    Was his name Norman Bates by any chance?
    I thought he was Wendy who likes walking and cats! :bawling:
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    (Original post by John55)
    I thought he was Wendy who likes walking and cats! :bawling:
    To be fair, anyone could have mistaken Norman for Wendy, it's so easy, look at his pic:

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    (Original post by TercioOfParma)
    Maybe call the police, you have those in Scotland or do you still dance around fires praying to the tree spirits?
    The tree spirit's are all dicks, they always put out our fires and eat the porridge .
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    (Original post by hezzlington)
    What sort of glue do you sniff?
    I sniffed a Pritt Stick once...
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    (Original post by toronto353)
    To be fair, anyone could have mistaken Norman for Wendy, it's so easy, look at his pic:

    Crikey, Norman hasn't aged well...
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    (Original post by John55)
    Crikey, Norman hasn't aged well...
    Wait til you see his mother:

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    (Original post by toronto353)
    Wait til you see his mother:

    :rofl:
    Spoiler:
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    ...She looks a little better though wouldn't you say?
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    (Original post by John55)
    :rofl:
    Spoiler:
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    ...She looks a little better though wouldn't you say?
    Perhaps she might be the one for you? You'll have to ditch the daughter though, hey there might be a Jeremy Kyle special in that for you to go on - silver linings and all that.
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    (Original post by toronto353)
    Perhaps she might be the one for you? You'll have to ditch the daughter though, hey there might be a Jeremy Kyle special in that for you to go on - silver linings and all that.
    It's always been a dream of mine to go on the Jeremy Kyle Show :daydreaming:.
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    (Original post by John55)
    It's always been a dream of mine to go on the Jeremy Kyle Show :daydreaming:.
    The topic presumably being 'I want to ditch this cross dressing men for his crossing dressing mother, an all round great guy' or just 'my life's ****ed up, help!'
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    (Original post by toronto353)
    The topic presumably being 'I want to ditch this cross dressing men for his crossing dressing mother, an all round great guy' or just 'my life's ****ed up, help!'
    It all sounds lovely but I need to survive the night first...
 
 
 
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