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How come my dad was like this, was it my fault for being odd? watch

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    Whilst growing up, how come my dad has always preferred to call me rather thanseeing my side of something and discussing it. An example was when we were going for a day out he had his music on loud in the car and it was uncomfortable to me. I asked for it to be turned down and my mum over reacting just turned it off. My dad then said to my mum 'shes a boring ***** isnt she'. I got annoyed and said that i only suggested turning it down not off and he went off on one saying 'why does she have to come to moan all the way and it caused an argument. I do love music but im the quiet type and listen to it on my headphones lol.

    Another example is at a family do i was conscious of an essay that needed finishing and so after a while asked if i could get home and my dad just said 'shes sad isnt she' lol.

    My mum said that i never got on with him past the age of 12 cause im a different personality he's more outgoing and im quiet/boring.

    Theres been loads of arguments because ive got annoyed at him not being able to discuss things and him just calling me. I dont know if its my fault as i can get obsessed with things like noise etc (expecially at night) but looking back I cant say that i like him and he doesnt like me. I sometimes wonder if im being oversensitive though, do you ever hold grudges against parents gor things?
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    You need to do what I did - establish your dominion over them and force them to do as you will. It'll take some time but they'll learn.

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    You do sound a bit sensitive/uptight.

    Try being more positive: loosen up and complain less. It'll probably improve your relationship with your dad. (and your other relationships too).

    Having said that, if my dad made some of those comments about me, I'd whoop his ass.
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    Okay he'd easily beat me in a physical fight so it'd have to be a verbal ass whooping.
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    Why couldn't you just let them listen to their music, the world doesn't revolve around you, like you guys are at a family function and you ask if you could leave, what's that? I could totally see why parents get annoyed....however calling you a ***** and all sorts of names isn't right I don't think you're being too sensitive at all.

    Maybe change your attitude a bit and be more understanding, stop sucking the lil stuff he enjoys like listening to his music in his own car.
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    It's a shame you had to have this sack of **** for a Dad. I wouldn't say blame yourself, you're his kid and you're allowed to have a personality of your own.

    I would just say to distance yourself from him, don't give him the satisfaction of getting a reaction out of you, and don't make him feel like he is worthy of getting to know you. Maybe he'll realise what a **** dad he is one day when he's old and decrepit and no one wants any of his ****.
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    your dad sounds like a ****** why would he say she's a boring ***** which is very rude
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    (Original post by WoodyMKC)
    Your dad sounds like a ****ing LAD.
    My grandma did said he's more like a kid in a mans body. She's shouted at him a few times for being rude to her.
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    (1) Yes, your behaviour is a bit odd in those examples, but I think it's clear that your dad just doesn't like your personality. That can happen, I guess, but is kind of sad given how much control parents have over their children.

    (2) It's OK not to like your parents, it's not like you chose them. Though that is kind of sad too.

    (3) It should be possible to get on with anyone who is reasonably considerate / non-judgmental, but it sounds like your dad only wants to be surrounded by cool people. Not my kind of person; I'd just avoid him as much as possible.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Whilst growing up, how come my dad has always preferred to call me rather thanseeing my side of something and discussing it. An example was when we were going for a day out he had his music on loud in the car and it was uncomfortable to me. I asked for it to be turned down and my mum over reacting just turned it off. My dad then said to my mum 'shes a boring ***** isnt she'. I got annoyed and said that i only suggested turning it down not off and he went off on one saying 'why does she have to come to moan all the way and it caused an argument. I do love music but im the quiet type and listen to it on my headphones lol.

    Another example is at a family do i was conscious of an essay that needed finishing and so after a while asked if i could get home and my dad just said 'shes sad isnt she' lol.

    My mum said that i never got on with him past the age of 12 cause im a different personality he's more outgoing and im quiet/boring.

    Theres been loads of arguments because ive got annoyed at him not being able to discuss things and him just calling me. I dont know if its my fault as i can get obsessed with things like noise etc (expecially at night) but looking back I cant say that i like him and he doesnt like me. I sometimes wonder if im being oversensitive though, do you ever hold grudges against parents gor things?
    You've done nothing wrong and you're not being sensitive. Your father, nor anybody else for that matter, has the right to speak to you like that. Just find a way to be happy and comfortable with who you are and be true to yourself.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Whilst growing up, how come my dad has always preferred to call me rather thanseeing my side of something and discussing it. An example was when we were going for a day out he had his music on loud in the car and it was uncomfortable to me. I asked for it to be turned down and my mum over reacting just turned it off. My dad then said to my mum 'shes a boring ***** isnt she'. I got annoyed and said that i only suggested turning it down not off and he went off on one saying 'why does she have to come to moan all the way and it caused an argument. I do love music but im the quiet type and listen to it on my headphones lol.

    Another example is at a family do i was conscious of an essay that needed finishing and so after a while asked if i could get home and my dad just said 'shes sad isnt she' lol.

    My mum said that i never got on with him past the age of 12 cause im a different personality he's more outgoing and im quiet/boring.

    Theres been loads of arguments because ive got annoyed at him not being able to discuss things and him just calling me. I dont know if its my fault as i can get obsessed with things like noise etc (expecially at night) but looking back I cant say that i like him and he doesnt like me. I sometimes wonder if im being oversensitive though, do you ever hold grudges against parents gor things?
    I'm a little bit like that with noise too, and I'm not very good at socializing irl either. Converstations (especially with strangers) terrify me. It doesn't help that I grew up being verbally and emotionally abused as well. I don't think there's anything really wrong with you, but you do need to learn how to set boundaries with your dad and see if you can tune out what he says. That's what I'm trying to do these days, and I wish you the best
 
 
 
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