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Ex has written huge post about me and we haven't even spoken in 3 months? Watch

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    Me and my ex broke up in Janurary, and have had no contact since the middle of February, my suggestion as she wanted to be friends and I wanted us to work things out, so we went no contact. We've never reached out to one another, directly or indirectly, we don't have any mutual friends on Facebook anymore and we were long distance so I don't see her face to face ever.

    My friend last night alerted to me a post she'd put on hee Tumblr, a place where she regularly posts her thoughts and feelings. It was probably about 5 paragraphs long and basically spat complete and utter poison at me and our relationship together, with everything she describes it as being as is total rubbish. I got quite upset that she felt that way but i don't intend on contacting her about it. My question is, why? Why post something like that around 3/4 months after a breakup when you tell everyone in the post that you don't care? What's the point? It just doesn't really make any sense to me at all.
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    Have a look at this.

    I found that it was somewhat accurate for me when I went through a breakup, though not all the things happened and not in a particular order.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Me and my ex broke up in Janurary, and have had no contact since the middle of February, my suggestion as she wanted to be friends and I wanted us to work things out, so we went no contact. We've never reached out to one another, directly or indirectly, we don't have any mutual friends on Facebook anymore and we were long distance so I don't see her face to face ever.

    My friend last night alerted to me a post she'd put on hee Tumblr, a place where she regularly posts her thoughts and feelings. It was probably about 5 paragraphs long and basically spat complete and utter poison at me and our relationship together, with everything she describes it as being as is total rubbish. I got quite upset that she felt that way but i don't intend on contacting her about it. My question is, why? Why post something like that around 3/4 months after a breakup when you tell everyone in the post that you don't care? What's the point? It just doesn't really make any sense to me at all.
    Sometimes it takes a lot more time for people to move on, and sometimes people find their own ways of moving on. In the case of your ex, she finds writing about the relationship (from her perspective) is beneficial in letting go of the past. It's normal for people to go "oh it was rubbish" about something they used to love and won't ever get back. It's much easier to forget about the past when the idea that 'the past was horrible and not worth holding onto' is embedded in your mind.
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    (Original post by SeanFM)
    Have a look at this.

    I found that it was somewhat accurate for me when I went through a breakup, though not all the things happened and not in a particular order.
    What stage would you suggest the meaning of this post is?
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    She sounds really immature tbh.
    Id just ignore it and her and move on.

    Something clearly made her seriously unhappy if she posted something like that!!!

    How did the relationship end?
    Did she seem happy towards the end of it?
    Girls are confusing at times so i really dont know why she would do that unless she seriously hated the relationship you two had!
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    She's not over it I don't think.
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    (Original post by SeanFM)
    Have a look at this.

    I found that it was somewhat accurate for me when I went through a breakup, though not all the things happened and not in a particular order.
    This
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    What stage would you suggest the meaning of this post is?
    'Anger'.

    It's just an idea/theory, it's not going to apply to everyone but.. :dontknow:

    I guess she's had some time to think about the relationship - might have initially been upset and now she's trying to get over it by being angry, maybe thinking about the bad parts or things that went wrong in the relationship.
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    (Original post by FireFreezer77)
    She sounds really immature tbh.
    Id just ignore it and her and move on.

    Something clearly made her seriously unhappy if she posted something like that!!!

    How did the relationship end?
    Did she seem happy towards the end of it?
    Girls are confusing at times so i really dont know why she would do that unless she seriously hated the relationship you two had!
    Long story short we argued for a week or so during the beginning of the new year, New Year's Eve included. She was starting a new job at the beginning of Janurary which I was wholly supportive of and was really excited about her starting, obviously had a few worries here and there but brought them up with her because we were in a relationship where we told each other everything. I'd tell her, she kick off at me or whatever. Anyway one day during an argument she said to me "I don't care, career before personal life", I let it slide until the day my grandad was rushed into hospital. She sensed I wasn't in a good mood, but she wasn't really fond of my grandad so I asked her if she really wanted to know, just because cautious to avoid another argument and again she kicked off. I ended it there and then as a result. I had no right to tell her that her priorities are wrong at the end of the day.

    She didn't seem to care when I ended it, first thing she said after was that she wanted the money I'd borrowed from her back (paid it back straight away).

    To be honest she's a strange one, I don't even know how she felt half the time. 70% she didn't care and 30% she did. Which makes me question why she's so irate about it now?
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    Maybe calling your ex's personal feelings about the relationship "utter rubbish" was part of the problem in the first place. You might not agree with it, but her perspective isn't any more or less valid than yours.

    In the wise words of C K Lewis; "when someone tell you that you hurt them, you don't get to decide that you didn't."

    Either way, that was her private blog which she uses to post her feelings as you already mentioned, it's quite likely that she didn't intend for you or your friend to have still been following or checking her tumblr, especially 3 months down the line, so it really shouldn't concern you.

    My suggestion is that you just forget about it and move on with your own life, leave her to her feelings just like she's left you to yours. Relationships are a two way street and every break up happens for a reason, there's always two sides to the story. She has hers and you have yours.
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    (Original post by insert-username)
    Maybe calling your ex's personal feelings about the relationship "utter rubbish" was part of the problem in the first place. You might not agree with it, but her perspective isn't any more or less valid than yours.

    In the wise words of C K Lewis; "when someone tell you that you hurt them, you don't get to decide that you didn't."

    Either way, that was her private blog which she uses to post her feelings as you already mentioned, it's quite likely that she didn't intend for you or your friend to have still been following or checking her tumblr, especially 3 months down the line, so it really shouldn't concern you.

    My suggestion is that you just forget about it and move on with your own life, leave her to her feelings just like she's left you to yours. Relationships are a two way street and every break up happens for a reason, there's always two sides to the story. She has hers and you have yours.
    With all due respect a social media channel like Tumblr is hardly private... She stalks my Twitter on the daily!
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Long story short we argued for a week or so during the beginning of the new year, New Year's Eve included. She was starting a new job at the beginning of Janurary which I was wholly supportive of and was really excited about her starting, obviously had a few worries here and there but brought them up with her because we were in a relationship where we told each other everything. I'd tell her, she kick off at me or whatever. Anyway one day during an argument she said to me "I don't care, career before personal life", I let it slide until the day my grandad was rushed into hospital. She sensed I wasn't in a good mood, but she wasn't really fond of my grandad so I asked her if she really wanted to know, just because cautious to avoid another argument and again she kicked off. I ended it there and then as a result. I had no right to tell her that her priorities are wrong at the end of the day.

    She didn't seem to care when I ended it, first thing she said after was that she wanted the money I'd borrowed from her back (paid it back straight away).

    To be honest she's a strange one, I don't even know how she felt half the time. 70% she didn't care and 30% she did. Which makes me question why she's so irate about it now?
    Well if she didnt care 70% of the time, it doesnt sound like she was very happy in the relationship. That may have something to do with it all! You did seem to argue a lot and she didnt seem to like any of your comments!
    Im glad you ended it because she sounds horrible tbh!!
    But shes extremely immature and i think shes an attention seeker. Thats why she put the post up!
    Youre a lot better off without her. Youll find someome amazing soon who will not argue with you all the time!!!
    Hopefully your grandad is ok!!
    But yeah she sounds horrible and youre better off without her!!!
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    Everything username said. Doesnt make her feelings any less valid, its just taken them more time to come out. You both did well taking a clean break. Imo let it go and move on as you have veen doing. Perhaps shes pouring a lot of her unhappiness into you breaking up, whether it was to blame or not. Dont waste your time looking for answers when you wont get any. If you know that what she posted was factually incorrect the leave her to it. She will move on eventually and just as she might be unhappy at the moment, she may change her mind a few years down the line. For goodness sake dont contact her until you have much more clear water between you.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    With all due respect a social media channel like Tumblr is hardly private... She stalks my Twitter on the daily!
    You haven't moved on if you're this hung up over it.

    Neither has she, but it's a little hypocritical to be posting about it on a public forum. You have people on here calling her bitter, or an "attention seeker" for posting it, yet you're not much different. The main point is that her tumblr post shouldn't actually concern you. Does it affect your life in any way? Nope. You wouldn't have even known about it if your friend hadn't "alerted you". So what are you trying to accomplish?

    The only person that can address your insecurity by telling you why she wrote what she did is your ex herself. Not a bunch of strangers on TSR. If you're really that upset about it then you should contact her to clear the air.
    If your only aim was to have elevate yourself and have your feelings validated by having a bunch of strangers call her "horrible" or "childish" then fair enough.

    Either way your ex's feelings about the relationship and break up are perfectly valid, just as yours are. You don't get to decide that how she felt was "utter rubbish" or poison.
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    (Original post by insert-username)
    You haven't moved on if you're this hung up over it.

    Neither has she, but it's a little hypocritical to be posting about it on a public forum. You have people on here calling her bitter, or an "attention seeker" for posting it, yet you're not much different. The main point is that her tumblr post shouldn't actually concern you. Does it affect your life in any way? Nope. You wouldn't have even known about it if your friend hadn't "alerted you". So what are you trying to accomplish?

    The only person that can address your insecurity by telling you why she wrote what she did is your ex herself. Not a bunch of strangers on TSR. If you're really that upset about it then you should contact her to clear the air.
    If your only aim was to have elevate yourself and have your feelings validated by having a bunch of strangers call her "horrible" or "childish" then fair enough.

    Either way your ex's feelings about the relationship and break up are perfectly valid, just as yours are. You don't get to decide that how she felt was "utter rubbish" or poison.
    You're right, i'm not fully over it yet, nor have I claimed to be. What I don't understand is why she's felt the need to put me on blast on social media which I feel is quite frankly petty, when in reality things really weren't that bad. I made a decision to break up with her as a result of what she chose to do, I did it for her, in her favour, which makes me beg the question why is it such a big deal to her now 3 months later?

    My aim wasn't to put her on blast here, nor seek people calling her such things, but to simply gain some insight into why, because as you rightfully said I'm not fully over it. I haven't slandered her over here like she has in her post on social media, i've simply stated the facts and allow people to voice their own opinion on it in order to give me some insight... after all, that's what forums are for are they not?
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    You arent listening to what people are telling you.
    Why? because it takes some people longer to react and she's been thinking about it for a while. Youve been told this from multiple posters.
    The only person who cna tell you exactly how she feels about things is her, but if you go down that route you will rake things up for your own curiosity.

    Let it go and move on.
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    Just leave it alone.

    She makes whiny tumblr posts dude be glad you made an escape
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    She needs a big dildo up her *******
 
 
 
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