Turn on thread page Beta

Is it wrong to cook for myself? watch

Announcements
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    22
    ReputationRep:
    Basically, today I've pissed off my stepfather due to cooking and I want to see if I am really in the wrong.

    I am 18, I live at home and today I decided to cook some food for myself (this was from about 4pm, I finished cooking at around 7pm and a few minutes after I came my stepfather came home and saw and was angry that I only cooked for myself and said I was selfish etc.

    I have cooked for my entire family before, twice this week already but today I decided to make something for myself, it was just meant to be a smallish 'lunch' food that ended up taking a while longer.

    I was basically told, to only cook for myself and if he cooks food for the family, I can't have any of it and then he bought up times I've cooked for myself before like when I have made myself pancakes. I didn't really think this was a big thing that I should cook for the family.

    Am I being unreasonable to have made some ribs for only myself? I also bought the meat and ingredients myself.
    Offline

    16
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Dinasaurus)
    Basically, today I've pissed off my stepfather due to cooking and I want to see if I am really in the wrong.

    I am 18, I live at home and today I decided to cook some food for myself (this was from about 4pm, I finished cooking at around 7pm and a few minutes after I came my stepfather came home and saw and was angry that I only cooked for myself and said I was selfish etc.

    I have cooked for my entire family before, twice this week already but today I decided to make something for myself, it was just meant to be a smallish 'lunch' food that ended up taking a while longer.

    I was basically told, to only cook for myself and if he cooks food for the family, I can't have any of it and then he bought up times I've cooked for myself before like when I have made myself pancakes. I didn't really think this was a big thing that I should cook for the family.

    Am I being unreasonable to have made some ribs for only myself? I also bought the meat and ingredients myself.
    Maybe he had a bad day.
    • Section Leader
    • Answer Heroes
    • Peer Support Volunteers
    Online

    21
    ReputationRep:
    Section Leader
    Answer Heroes
    Peer Support Volunteers
    (Original post by Dinasaurus)
    Basically, today I've pissed off my stepfather due to cooking and I want to see if I am really in the wrong.

    I am 18, I live at home and today I decided to cook some food for myself (this was from about 4pm, I finished cooking at around 7pm and a few minutes after I came my stepfather came home and saw and was angry that I only cooked for myself and said I was selfish etc.

    I have cooked for my entire family before, twice this week already but today I decided to make something for myself, it was just meant to be a smallish 'lunch' food that ended up taking a while longer.

    I was basically told, to only cook for myself and if he cooks food for the family, I can't have any of it and then he bought up times I've cooked for myself before like when I have made myself pancakes. I didn't really think this was a big thing that I should cook for the family.

    Am I being unreasonable to have made some ribs for only myself? I also bought the meat and ingredients myself.
    Not unreasonable at all.
    Offline

    19
    ReputationRep:
    I see nothing wrong with it :dontknow:
    Offline

    19
    ReputationRep:
    If you are just cooking for yourself as a kinda snack then that's fine, but if you are cooking to deliberately make him mad then that's kinda a **** move on your part
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    22
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by claireestelle)
    Not unreasonable at all.
    He flipped out at me over this food issue and said I was ****ing selfish and that I don't care about my mother and then switched his tone to say "do what you think is right, if you think this is the right way to live then do it" trying to guilt me but I honestly didn't think it was a big issue, I made some ribs and kimchi pancakes. My family don't even eat kimchi
    • Section Leader
    • Answer Heroes
    • Peer Support Volunteers
    Online

    21
    ReputationRep:
    Section Leader
    Answer Heroes
    Peer Support Volunteers
    (Original post by Dinasaurus)
    He flipped out at me over this food issue and said I was ****ing selfish and that I don't care about my mother and then switched his tone to say "do what you think is right, if you think this is the right way to live then do it" trying to guilt me but I honestly didn't think it was a big issue, I made some ribs and kimchi pancakes. My family don't even eat kimchi
    I would ignore him
    Offline

    17
    ReputationRep:
    Yea it was wrong. Snacks or lunch would of been ok but cooking an evening meal just for yourself when others are around is bad manners unless they arranged something else.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    22
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by GUMI)
    If you are just cooking for yourself as a kinda snack then that's fine, but if you are cooking to deliberately make him mad then that's kinda a **** move on your part
    I didn't cook to make him mad, he wasn't even at home as I started cooking 3 hours before he even got back. This is the first thing I've eaten today other than a snickers bar so I thought it's a bit of a big meal but it's not like I'm using the household's resources to make it, seeing as I went out to buy meat before I got home.
    Offline

    13
    ReputationRep:
    Woah i do this all the time.. Mostly because in my family we all eat at different times..
    I never knew it could anger someone D:
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    22
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by INTit)
    Yea it was wrong. Snacks or lunch would of been ok but cooking an evening meal just for yourself when others are around is bad manners unless they arranged something else.
    But I was in class at lunch time and I hadn't eaten all day, I started cooking when I got home and he wasn't even in, just when I ended up finishing and plating my food, he walks in the door and sees and complains.

    I even left a piece of meat I cooked for someone to take, I didn't buy enough meat to cook for the entire family.
    • Political Ambassador
    Offline

    21
    ReputationRep:
    Political Ambassador
    (Original post by Dinasaurus)
    Basically, today I've pissed off my stepfather due to cooking and I want to see if I am really in the wrong.

    I am 18, I live at home and today I decided to cook some food for myself (this was from about 4pm, I finished cooking at around 7pm and a few minutes after I came my stepfather came home and saw and was angry that I only cooked for myself and said I was selfish etc.

    I have cooked for my entire family before, twice this week already but today I decided to make something for myself, it was just meant to be a smallish 'lunch' food that ended up taking a while longer.

    I was basically told, to only cook for myself and if he cooks food for the family, I can't have any of it and then he bought up times I've cooked for myself before like when I have made myself pancakes. I didn't really think this was a big thing that I should cook for the family.

    Am I being unreasonable to have made some ribs for only myself? I also bought the meat and ingredients myself.
    Not unreasonable at all, in my family we tend to do this a lot purely because of school/work and everyone likes different foods.
    Offline

    17
    ReputationRep:
    No it's not wrong, I cook for myself (badly).

    Today I have family over and everyone is going to eat pizza, I don't want pizza so I'm going to make myself something else, that isn't wrong or selfish.
    Offline

    19
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Dinasaurus)
    I am 18, I live at home and today I decided to cook some food for myself (this was from about 4pm, I finished cooking at around 7pm and a few minutes after I came my stepfather came home and saw and was angry that I only cooked for myself and said I was selfish etc.
    I'd be pissed too if it took you 3 hours to make ribs.

    Unless you slaughtered whatever it was you were getting ribs from in the process. Then you'd get mad props.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    22
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Rhythmical)
    Not unreasonable at all, in my family we tend to do this a lot purely because of school/work and everyone likes different foods.
    I assumed he'd see it that way but no, generally if I make something that I know everyone eats I always leave it for everyone to have.

    But today I was trying out some different foods that normally my family don't eat and they weren't even home when I started cooking but it seems I'm terrible for it.
    • Answer Heroes
    Offline

    19
    Answer Heroes
    No, but knowing how he is, then you should have predicted his mean spirited reaction and done a few more or cooked faster so he never found out. He just seems grouchy.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    22
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Drunk Punx)
    I'd be pissed too if it took you 3 hours to make ribs.

    Unless you slaughtered whatever it was you were getting ribs from in the process. Then you'd get mad props.
    I marinated it which took the majority of the time, I also made the marinade. Then I slow cooked it at low heat for an hour.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    22
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by 999tigger)
    No, but knowing how he is, then you should have predicted his mean spirited reaction and done a few more or cooked faster so he never found out. He just seems grouchy.
    If he had walked in the door 5 minutes later, I could've been done, without any hassle. I even cleaned up afterwards so it's not like anyone would even notice.
    Offline

    17
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Dinasaurus)
    If he had walked in the door 5 minutes later, I could've been done, without any hassle. I even cleaned up afterwards so it's not like anyone would even notice.
    You did nothing wrong, forget him!
    • Political Ambassador
    Offline

    21
    ReputationRep:
    Political Ambassador
    (Original post by Dinasaurus)
    I assumed he'd see it that way but no, generally if I make something that I know everyone eats I always leave it for everyone to have.

    But today I was trying out some different foods that normally my family don't eat and they weren't even home when I started cooking but it seems I'm terrible for it.
    Aw don't feel terrible about it. It's not the end of the world and not your fault. Your intentions were honest and you didn't mean to try and offend him. If anything, given your age, he should expect you to cook for yourself and learn skills for later on in life.
 
 
 
Poll
Brexit: Given the chance now, would you vote leave or remain?
Useful resources

Groups associated with this forum:

View associated groups

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Write a reply...
Reply
Hide
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.