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Re: I don't understand why I got rejected... Watch

    • Thread Starter

    (Original post by Airmed)
    Diving in and ask people if they like to cook or bake is a bit weird imo. You need to start off with non personal questions first, like what's the time, what do they think of the weather etc.

    Approaching people in a library is also considered a bit weird. Most people go to read or study, not to be disturbed.
    It's not weird because as I've stated multiple times almost everyone cooks and cooking is universal to all cultures, I could learn from people.

    I wouldn't ask someone what the time is as there are most likely clocks there and I have my phone. I can't talk about the weather as I know nothing about meteorology.

    (Original post by 999tigger)
    OP for the majority on here the library isnt a place to socialise. There no harm in asking for peoples number but everyone is different and if you come across as odd they will not want o remain in contact.

    Why dont you join some social clubs or societies at your uni i.e cooking and get used to socialising that way? It would be natural to keep in contact with people. Imo id wait longer than 10 minutes.

    Bear in mind your awareness is different so you cant rely on recognising the body language and social queues that other people might see. You should really listen to soem of the advice people are trying to give you.
    I don't ask for people's phone numbers. I never asked Jenny for her phone number. I'm not at university. I don't know where social clubs are

    (Original post by Profesh)
    In theory, one might equally strike up a conversation at a urinal with the person using the adjacent convenience. In practice, one doesn't, because the environment isn't designed to facilitate such and to do otherwise would not therefore be the habit of a prima facie 'normal' person.

    Likewise, libraries are not social venues, and behaving as though they were is decidedly anti-social. Stop being such a ****ing ignoramus.
    The comparison of a library and a urinal are seems silly. You don't really have enough time to have a conversation weil urinating as it takes about less than a minute to do that.

    (Original post by VannR)
    I genuinely read this thinking that you were doing a survey...this is how you go about getting a girl's number?
    Nope. I don't believe in "chatting up" females. I only want to make friends and find a possible romantic partner.

    (Original post by doodle_333)
    OK 99.9% of people wouldn't want to make friends with a random stranger they've known for a few minutes.

    You'd be much better placed to meet people/make friends at events where socialising is more encouraged, e.g. meeting a friend of a friend at a social event, going to a club/class/group
    I don't understand why, if they seem nice and you have things in common you can be friends with them. As I've stated before I don't know where clubs are.

    (Original post by lyrical_lie)
    I don't think this is real but I'll also raise the point... it's exam time. If someone came up to me asking if I cook etc. when I'm frantically studying for an exam or doing a dissertation I'd probably answer them and hope they go away quickly (and inwardly be seething that you're wasting my valuable study time). I'd definitely not want to keep in touch. They would be a story I would tell my friends about as something bizarre that happened to me in the library.
    That's a bit sad to know, you could be missing out on a good friend that you could go out with after your exams.
    (Original post by Jebedee)
    I am 100% certain you are MyLittlePlusie. So going off what is already known about you, it seems you're having a massive problem grasping simple social dynamics and cues and really don't like being told about it.

    The best advice I can give is find someone who is in a similar situation to yourself. Maybe an autistic dating site?
    A lot of auitsic dating sites are ones that you need to pay for. I only go to the libary once a week. If I don't go out to the libary and talk to people I won't get any socialization which is bad for me. If I don't talk to people I'll be alone so I'll happy talk to jsut about anyone as long as they're nie and we have things in common.
    • Very Important Poster

    Very Important Poster
    TSR isn't always the best place to get a consensus, but I think a sensible one has been reached here. Okay, we can't really convince you that it's just not going to work in a library, but I think you should just take that for granted and try something else.
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