Alcoholism & boredom

Hello.

Well, to start, I'm worried about my drinking. It's a symptom more than a problem itself from what I see though.

In the past couple of years I have made close to zero new friends. I've never hugely clicked with my friends at uni, and my old previous-close friends back home just seem to annoy me more than anything else in the past while. Everyone just seems to bore me now.

I'm quite extroverted, probably, I usually like socialising - or at least being around people. Particularly new people, on the off-chance I might actually enjoy somebody's company for once. Since I find my friends fairly boring though, I don't really have the urge to do anything with them, and they very rarely come up with anything exciting that is worth doing either. As a result, I find myself going quite long periods of time without meaningfully interacting with anyone that I even want to talk to.

So it seems I'm turning to alcohol. I've always drank a lot, but now it's just a way to pass time more than anything. I've never enjoyed staying in, watching TV or any of that sort of thing, so it's really just a substitute for being sociable.

I'm not particularly good at analysing the real root of this problem or what I should do - so if anyone has any decent advice I'd be happy to hear it. Thanks.

Reply 1

frank01277779

1

Very confusing as you seem to completely contradict yourself at least twice - Being extroverted and sociable but have made no new friends? That just doesn't make sense. Plus not enjoying staying in but (presumably) drinking by yourself inside? No sense either!

I go through periods of being bored with everyone I know, and feeling like I need to meet new people, but a good night out tends to come along and I'm alright again for a while...

I enjoy being by myself a fair bit though, and using forums a lot kind of makes up for real human interaction (sort of, but it's probably a bad thing...)

The drinking I wouldn't worry about too much, I tend to think people should do what they enjoy doing...Unless you find you can't stop. So I'd say test yourself - say a week, or two weeks and see how much you crave it (wanting to drink out of boredom in this period is different, you can control that bit with self-discipline)

Advice for fixing it - change something with your life to get out of the cycle. New job? New city? New gf? Travel for a while? No idea really.

Reply 2

andy_cole2

14

Why did you become friends with these people in the first place, there must be something that appealed. i don't think moving betweeng roups of friends is necesarily the answer, you could keep on drifting forever, there are good and bad things about everyone, try and determine whatever it was you liked about the people before and find more people like that, or just try and hone in on those characteristics of your old friends...turning to alcohol is never the answer...

Reply 3

Paperfolders57

Are these so friends of yours really worth the effort , you sound like you can do better , without them going it alone cant you enjoy yourself the same!

Reply 4

goodmen

13

your clearly not an extrovert otherwise you would have made soem friends

Reply 5

Dionysus

15

Sounds to me like you go out with a group of people and get so plastered so quickly that you CAN'T make friends. Admittedly, I do that myself occasionally, but not every time. Try taking it slow - drink one pint to every two other people have; in a club have singles with mixers instead of doubles. It'll make you last longer, and saves you some money to buy a drink for 'that person'.

Reply 6

sarCAZm

11

pub.

Reply 7

puppy

Anonymous

and they very rarely come up with anything exciting that is worth doing either. .

Do you? Sounds to me like you expect a lot and give very little. Perhaps you ought to think about what's wrong with you rather than blaming others around you. Failing that just keep going out and meeting people until you find someone 'good enough' for you to interact with meaningfully.

RE alcoholism, provided you don't need a drink to get up in the morning then you probably don't have a problem. However, prolonged and excessive drinking will eventually do long term damage. You obviously know this, it's up to you whether you care or not.

Reply 8

flakey18

hmm..i can empathise with you regarding the uni friends matter - most of my conversations at uni were based around nights out and drinking. a lot of people were extremely superficial, there was nothing to them beyond conversations like this. it annoyed me for a while, but eventually i found people i clicked with. it's all good in the end i suppose - but it is quite worrying if you drink alone (i'm not sure whether you were referring to drinking alone or drinking more when out. i must admit, i drink a lot more now, especially on a boring night out. that's just to make it a bit more enjoyable tbh and make time go quicker lol)

Reply 9

heggers89

Maybe you need to stop hanging around with these people who you believe are 'boring' full stop. If they are making you feel a bit down with yourself then stop hanging around with them. Try and get into new activities and keep trying to find people who stimulate you- they're definately out there.

Also, I hope you understand that drinking by yourself is completly pathetic and can lead on to truly horrible things. Stop feeling sorry for yourself and get out there!

Reply 10

toth8

3

Anonymous

Hello.

Well, to start, I'm worried about my drinking. It's a symptom more than a problem itself from what I see though.

In the past couple of years I have made close to zero new friends. I've never hugely clicked with my friends at uni, and my old previous-close friends back home just seem to annoy me more than anything else in the past while. Everyone just seems to bore me now.

I'm quite extroverted, probably, I usually like socialising - or at least being around people. Particularly new people, on the off-chance I might actually enjoy somebody's company for once. Since I find my friends fairly boring though, I don't really have the urge to do anything with them, and they very rarely come up with anything exciting that is worth doing either. As a result, I find myself going quite long periods of time without meaningfully interacting with anyone that I even want to talk to.

So it seems I'm turning to alcohol. I've always drank a lot, but now it's just a way to pass time more than anything. I've never enjoyed staying in, watching TV or any of that sort of thing, so it's really just a substitute for being sociable.

I'm not particularly good at analysing the real root of this problem or what I should do - so if anyone has any decent advice I'd be happy to hear it. Thanks.

Find a hobby. :rolleyes:

Reply 11

wirbelsturm

2

being ****ed is very nice, enjoy it while u can, get stoned take drugs, very much very good.

Alcoholism & boredom

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