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Why arent rape victims taken seriously Watch

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    Possible SA/Rape TW
    Im the strongest person i know. I was sexually assaulted / raped and i have done a lot to perk back up since. Its almost a years anniversary of my attack and im feeling extremelt down, getting my symptoms and flash backs again

    Why are rape victims not taken seriousy? Why do people say things like why were you there and what were you wearing and i cant believe a judge asked one victim ' did you try and close your legs'
    I feel sick. Theres no way on earth anyone would be able to know the feeling unless theyve been through it. I cant even think of the words. Yet police and lawyers are ones who tet to decide if it happened or not? Eg kesha who was raped by her producer and wasnt allowed to leave the contract because of lack of evidence. Its horrible and i feel sick. Lack of support from anyone will prevent a victim getting help from anywhere else. The rapist already made them feel worthless... And helpless. We dont need that from anyone else
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    Not to be sexist but it's usually men that don't take it seriously because I suppose they don't see it as a big deal. Obviously they are completely wrong and it should be taken seriously but you have to keep in mind the following:

    You did nothing wrong and this happened because someone made the wrong choice at the wrong time. What's happened Is traumatic of course, but you can get over this. You're obviously a strong person to speak out and seek advice on such a disturbing topic, and well done for actually trying to get supporting and not keeping quiet like many rape victims do.

    There will always be help or guidance online and I'm sure you can talk to people that have been in the same situation. On the bright side, it sounds as if you have hit rock bottom, now the only place you can go from here is up.

    Hope you stay well, and if you really do just need someone to talk too feel free to DM me :yes:

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    ive never heard of anyone outside the internet say 'well you shouldnt have been dressing like that/shouldve closed your legs' outside of the internet, 99% of the time being feminists who use that analogy to complain about rape victims not being taken seriously.

    truth is the vast vast majority of people take rape victims very seriously, particularly in the real world.

    police and lawyers are also there to make sure women dont falsely accuse guys of rape and ruin their lives, a practice that is abused far too much in this country.
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    Most people do take rape seriously. As for you talking about Kesha and why police decide if a rape has occurred, they can only make arrests based on facts and these people are only prosecuted on facts, that's the very definition of justice, so I don't see your point really.

    I don't know who you've been speaking to, but if they think rape victims are somehow the ones at fault, then it's best not to associate with them any longer, and that's all you really can do. It's a topic that's so serious, that I'm half regretting responding, but oh well.
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    (Original post by BullViagra)
    ive never heard of anyone outside the internet say 'well you shouldnt have been dressing like that/shouldve closed your legs' outside of the internet, 99% of the time being feminists who use that analogy to complain about rape victims not being taken seriously.

    truth is the vast vast majority of people take rape victims very seriously, particularly in the real world.

    police and lawyers are also there to make sure women dont falsely accuse guys of rape and ruin their lives, a practice that is abused far too much in this country.
    A crime which should be just as badly punished (if not worse -please ask if you want me to explain why).
    It's not that rape victims are not taken seriously, it's that rape is a crime that is hard to prove, beyond any reasonable doubt, that it actually happened. If there is undeniable proof that someone was raped then of course everyone sympathises (or try to) as it must really be horrific for victims.
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    (Original post by BullViagra)
    ive never heard of anyone outside the internet say 'well you shouldnt have been dressing like that/shouldve closed your legs' outside of the internet, 99% of the time being feminists who use that analogy to complain about rape victims not being taken seriously.

    truth is the vast vast majority of people take rape victims very seriously, particularly in the real world.

    police and lawyers are also there to make sure women dont falsely accuse guys of rape and ruin their lives, a practice that is abused far too much in this country.
    *cough* Ched Evans *cough*
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    The amount of false rape accusations that women use on men really does devalue a woman's word. It wasn't always like this and I'm sorry.


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    (Original post by Limerence.)
    The amount of false rape accusations that women use on men really does devalue a woman's word. It wasn't always like this and I'm sorry.


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    Could you provide some statistical analysis of women doing it now vs earlier? And how many rape accusations are false, as opposed to unproven?
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    Not sure what you mean really, in the UK we take rape very seriously and any accusation is met with a lot of support and attention.

    The thing is, a very particular type of crime in that a lot of the time when it is committed, the only witness is the victim.
    Given how destructive a rape accusation is on a perpetrator, it isn't fair to simply and always take the 'victims' word on faith as there is the potential for malicious conduct. Now, the number of cases where this occurs actually with malicious intent, I imagine is extremely small, but it still reminds us of how difficult it is to prove this sort of crime was committed. It is possible that a victim may have consented in the moment, but did not fully recall this or that they convinced themselves afterwards that they did not. If you do not have evidence you can not pin down someone on a crime, to me this seems like a fair judicial system. How would you like it if I accused you of raping someone and expected the authorities to act without any evidence?

    I think there is a difference between taking a rape victim seriously and asking questions about atire, location actions ect. I think it is insensitive to the victim, especially at the moment in time. I do however believe that ones actions will inevitably affect the situation even on a small level, and it is useful to take precautionary measures, which is something we should inform our population. This does not condone rape in any manner, but more acts as a safety net for prevention.
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    The percentage of false accusations is comparatively low. http://www.theguardian.com/society/2...se-accusations

    Rape is taken seriously - but getting people to acknowledge a rape, a "real" rape occurred is difficult. This isn't gender based. Men and women have fairly equal views on what constitutes abusive sexual behaviour - usually in the view of not seeing something as abusive. BBC3 did a documentary which invoked young people deciding whether something was rape. That was certainly eye opening.

    A lot of abusive behaviour has been normalised/minimised. "Oh, that happens to everyone"

    Attitudes about rape are one of the key factors in low conviction rates for rape. If someone has been drinking, previously flirty, invited rapist into home, wearing revealing clothing.. If the rapist is prominent figure, wealthy, famous...all these factors reduce people's willingness to convict because when faced with putting someone in jail, rape is often lacking in the kind of even fence which helps people feel sure. So they rely on their point of view.

    when I went to court, the judge asked me if I would have slept with my rapist another time (because prior to the rape he had been my boyfriend). It really felt like I shouldn't have said no. That good girlfriends should be available for sex all the time. The defence tried to say I wasn't skinny enough. I was below the average size for women, at that time, so hardly massive.

    And it's not just people online that say stuff. I had a girl say, to my face, that she wouldn't have said no. Apparently I was supposed to be grateful he had wanted sex. It doesn't matter that he took an underage girl to a club, got her drunk and tried to spike her drink so that she wouldn't remember - because she wouldn't say yes to the sex acts he wanted when sober. He was actually the one to report the rape (ironically) because he reported the allegation to a mandated reporter. This is how messed up system is because he admitted to a few people then played victim. He was still found not guilty.

    The system does its best but rape myths are pervasive and they impact trials. Lack of definitive evidence hinders it. The whole process is so scary and intimidating. Especially when you know the attacker and have to be around them. I can see why people choose not to report or withdraw their statement.
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    Yeah i agree that there are some horrible people who falsely accuse rape. But there are also many real victims who are helpless because they have nothing to prove it. And its honestly such a downer not recieving the right support from people it makes you not want to seek help from anyone else.
    I think i was misunderstood in my post.
    About the kesha thing it wasnt an issue of whether the guy was arrested but the issue of her being allowed to leave her contract.
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    As a victim of child rape, I'd like to give you my opinion on rape accusations.

    If someone is accused of rape, of course it should be taken seriously, but it should not be made public unless the accused is oroven guilty, nor should the 'victim' be automatically believed without any evidence. Everyone should be given a fair trial, meaning they are innocent until oroven guilty.

    And, although the person who raped me, who was infact my grandfather, was never convicted, I would rather he not be convicted than people to change the law so that innocent people get convicted because they were accused, just to ensure all rapists are convicted. The fact is, sometimes people lie, so thats why we have courts.
 
 
 
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