Love me, love me not?

Well there is this lad, and I've liked him for a long time, since we met in September '05.
I managed to curb my liking for him throughout his relationship with his long term girlfriend at the time, and was there for him when they broke up last year. He was devastated, as she was his everything. I was the one he turned to.
I've been there for him whenever he needed me, helping him back on his feet. Now he is 'dating' again, but I am unsure about the exclusivity of this relationship. He doesn't talk about her too much, and seems to call me first. It seems like he's open for offers to me, knowing him as well as I do.
I forgot to mention, he has always flirted with me, even when he was in a relationship.
He came around to my house today, and it was so nice, just being with him, messing around y'know?
I just need your thoughts on whether he likes me, and whether I should just take the plunge like I know I should have already done (I held back because he was very stressed during exam/coursework season. When he found this new girl, I was devastated, as well as shocked- it was unexpected.), and any advice on how to go about it.
Thanks.

Reply 1

calluna

when messing around try and let one thing lead to another and if he likes you then things will just start to slide into place.

dont know if thats any good?

Reply 2

Sambola

Since its just a relatively new relationship, I suggest telling him how you feel about him. Then it'll be up for him to decide.

Reply 3

Eidothea

1

The liking seems a bit one-sided to me, although you do need to know exactly where you stand. Maybe you can find a subtle way of asking him??? Just make sure that you're not a rebound girl.

Reply 4

*pink_sapphires*

1

I'm in the same situation, however the guy hasn't found another girl yet, and we've only just started to get close since he broke up with his gf of 2 years. I'm here for him and I'm trying to help him the best I can. I think the advice given so far is really good :smile:

I'm planning on doing what calluna said but as eidothea says, i don't want to be a rebound girl.

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

OP

Thanks for the reply guys!
Fortunately, it seems the relationship wasn't as exclusive as I thought it was when I originally posted.
Still, it's the "does he like me, do I risk our friendship" situation. But you've all heard enough of those.
He came so close to me the other day (we were doing an activity we always do together...he comes on here and will know if I say it) his nose was touching mine and I just wanted to kiss him!
ARGH!

Reply 6

khil

15

I say instead of messing around, take your chances and tell him. It's now or never - you've waited long enough and now the chance is finally there - you'll just kick yourself if you let this slip. Better to be rejected and KNOW it, then to hang in there hoping, I say. For as long as you hope and think that there might be a chance, you'll never move on. You're young and you have a life to live - don't let this guy hold you back. If he's not interested, you need to know so you can move on and find someone else for yourself and live your own life, not a life supporting him when he's not yours. And if he likes you back, then all is great and happy ending. You can't lose. You've lived with him being unavailable - you can live with it again and you will move on eventually - but what you CAN'T live with is knowing that you COULD have had him, but didn't take the chance to be with him, and finding that out only too late.

My advice - either seize the chance NOW and tell him, or just forget about him. He's just a guy - he's not worth you wasting your life over him. He's not yours. And if you don't tell him, he may never be yours. But if you do, then at least he could be yours. And if he doesn't choose you, then at least you can get on with your life and move on, at last. You've waited long enough - it's time to let go if you're not gonna go for the guy or can't have him. You can't wait for him forever.

Reply 7

FlyingIsis

1

you're a backup girl who will never replace or measure up to his first gf in his mind....its harsh but true

Reply 8

khil

15

Anonymous

Thanks for the reply guys!
Fortunately, it seems the relationship wasn't as exclusive as I thought it was when I originally posted.
Still, it's the "does he like me, do I risk our friendship" situation. But you've all heard enough of those.
He came so close to me the other day (we were doing an activity we always do together...he comes on here and will know if I say it) his nose was touching mine and I just wanted to kiss him!
ARGH!

My girl, you should've kissed him!

And btw, going by that alone, I say he definitely likes you, unless he's a player, which he doesn't seem to be.

It's how my bf and I got together :biggrin:

Fell asleep on the floor after a playfight, woke up on the floor on the same pillow and we started rubbing noses :biggrin:

and eventually kissed.

Seriously, take the chance and just go for it! You have nothing to lose. You might as well take the chance, especially when the signs are that strong. What my bf did to "test" the waters after we rubbed noses was that he kissed me on the nose and chin :p:

So I went for the corner of his mouth lol :wink:

and he shifted his face so we kissed properly instead lol, cus by my response he realised I liked him back. So how about you try that tactic? Kiss his nose or something :wink:

or his cheek, but close enough to the mouth to indicate something :p:

Suggest something like a playfight, or tickle each other :wink:

That usually leads to things like kisses - and when the chance is there, just give him a fleeting kiss on the cheek near the mouth, or on the mouth, or nose. If he's interested, he'll come after you for a kiss methinks.

But all in all, for goodness' sake - GO FOR IT! Whatever you do, however you do it - let him know that you're interested :smile:

Love me, love me not?

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