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    Hi guys,

    So it's the end of first year for me and I'd say that this year has included some ups and downs, mainly downs. I feel happy about leaving for the summer as I get to spend 4 months with family. However, one thing that's on my mind is the fact that I feel as though I haven't made many friends here. I'm seeing all of these people on Facebook tagging the friends they've made at uni, saying how they've had such a wonderful first year because of them, and I guess I'm kind of jealous that I haven't been tagged in any of these. I can honestly say that I only have maybe 5 friends at uni, only 1 of which invites me out, and I normally reject him because of my social anxiety. I spend almost all day and every night stuck in my room. I keep promising myself that I will change and go out more next year, but I'm not sure I will. I keep meaning to go to the doctor's about this, as I haven't actually officially been diagnosed.
    Anyone else out there feel this way? What would your advice be?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hi guys,

    So it's the end of first year for me and I'd say that this year has included some ups and downs, mainly downs. I feel happy about leaving for the summer as I get to spend 4 months with family. However, one thing that's on my mind is the fact that I feel as though I haven't made many friends here. I'm seeing all of these people on Facebook tagging the friends they've made at uni, saying how they've had such a wonderful first year because of them, and I guess I'm kind of jealous that I haven't been tagged in any of these. I can honestly say that I only have maybe 5 friends at uni, only 1 of which invites me out, and I normally reject him because of my social anxiety. I spend almost all day and every night stuck in my room. I keep promising myself that I will change and go out more next year, but I'm not sure I will. I keep meaning to go to the doctor's about this, as I haven't actually officially been diagnosed.
    Anyone else out there feel this way? What would your advice be?
    You sound like you're in a very similar situation to me when I was in first year. When I went home for summer, I was really happy just to get away from Uni. If this is the first time you've been away from your family and you feel that you don't have any friends, it can be very lonely.

    Facebook never helps when you see that other people claim to be having a great time, which you aren't having.

    I managed to get myself out of this situation. I went living with a new set of people and got on brilliantly with them.

    People on here will say societies are the answer, but that's not always the case. I'd advise to keep yourself as busy as possible.

    Maybe try and treat the Uni day like a regular working day - go to the library and work hard to get the best possible mark you can. Personally, I liked to keep active and let that slip in first year. I wasn't particularly good at sports, but enjoyed taking part - my Uni had social sports clubs for people like me.

    Look around your union/their website, there's possibly more going on that you could get involved in than you think and beyond societies. Again, my Uni had film clubs, board game nights, book clubs, activities based on your degree, nights out, all beyond the regular societies. Dig a little deeper, be brave (I know it's hard!) and try and put yourself out there and hopefully your next years at Uni will be better

    Are you living in halls?
    Where are you living next year?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hi guys,

    So it's the end of first year for me and I'd say that this year has included some ups and downs, mainly downs. I feel happy about leaving for the summer as I get to spend 4 months with family. However, one thing that's on my mind is the fact that I feel as though I haven't made many friends here. I'm seeing all of these people on Facebook tagging the friends they've made at uni, saying how they've had such a wonderful first year because of them, and I guess I'm kind of jealous that I haven't been tagged in any of these. I can honestly say that I only have maybe 5 friends at uni, only 1 of which invites me out, and I normally reject him because of my social anxiety. I spend almost all day and every night stuck in my room. I keep promising myself that I will change and go out more next year, but I'm not sure I will. I keep meaning to go to the doctor's about this, as I haven't actually officially been diagnosed.
    Anyone else out there feel this way? What would your advice be?
    You need to explain to your friend that you have social anxiety and thats why you reject him. If you dont explain it he will get fed up of you saying no all the time and you wont have any friends at all. Ask the tutors at uni for advice of where to get help for your social anxiety. Make the appointment with your doctor, if you keep putting it off it will get worse. Its nice of that one friend to ask you out when others dont bother so try to make the effort to go out with him. Your lucky as most people have no friends at all. All my frjends are useless so im looking for new friends but ill explain about useless friends in a seperate post. If you tell people you have social anxiety you will realise most people suffer from it but too embarasssed to talk about it and they can give you advice on how to cope with it and you can help each other
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    You have to be proactive in getting yourself out of this rut. I understand it's difficult but you can't sit idly by. Next year, join some societies, go out with your friend more and just generally put yourself outside of your comfort zone.

    It WILL be difficult. You'll be out and about in an environment you're not comfortable in and it will suck, you'll want to go home or heck depending on how you deal with your anxiety you may feel like crying. Just accept the emotions and push forward. The more you expose yourself the easier things will get. Also, try not to compare your life to others; on social media people always show off their best side.
 
 
 
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