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Cambridge Chat (previously New Cambridge Students Entry 2004)

I suspect that in the majority of cases sex isn't a good enough reason to rush a marriage. The other reasons are sound though! :wink:

Reply 17001

crana9

2

Ticki

I suspect that in the majority of cases sex isn't a good enough reason to rush a marriage. The other reasons are sound though! :wink:

seriously. for horny christians it's a big deal.

did you not read that article about the dude who got married in TCS/varsity? about how he and his GF were giving each other their virginity as their wedding presents or something similarly puketastic?

Reply 17002

crana9

2

If I could arrange some kind of freaky marriage to a distant cousin, I could be looking at a kick-ass scholarship. yeah baby!

ETA: I do think the university should butt out of students' private lives more though. like.. you should be allowed to have a job if you want one (ha! didn't stop me!). if it interferes with your studies then sanctions should be applied in exactly the same way as they would be if it was rowing or acting that is interfering with your studies. you shouldn't have to ask your college's permission to get married, but equally you shouldn't expect a whole load of privileges if you do get married. they should scrap the residence requirement as it's clearly a load of *******s. as long as you go to your lectures and supervisions and stuff it's your own business what you do and where you stay the night outside of that time.

Reply 17003

Ticki

8

crana9

seriously. for horny christians it's a big deal.

did you not read that article about the dude who got married in TCS/varsity? about how he and his GF were giving each other their virginity as their wedding presents or something similarly puketastic?

Yeah, that's the article I was thinking of. But I really doubt sex was their prime motivation. I'm a Christian and I really can't think of any of my Christian friends who would let that small factor determine such a life-changing decision.

Reply 17004

crana9

2

Ticki

Yeah, that's the article I was thinking of. But I really doubt sex was their prime motivation. I'm a Christian and I really can't think of any of my Christian friends who would let that small factor determine such a life-changing decision.

don't tell me you have GHD.

obviously you wouldn't just marry someone you weren't serious about just to get laid, but if you're in a serious relationship with someone aren't you more likely to feel that you should get married to be "legit" than someone who has no religious persuasion?

I mean, I don't have any kind of religion, I don't really care about getting married although I probably will - I don't think I am somehow being bad if I have a serious (+/- sexual?) relationship outside marriage.

If I firmly believed that marriage was very important for people that love each other especially if the relationship was going to go past a bedtime kiss then I'd think it was much more important to get married to someone I loved and was in a serious relationship with.

Reply 17005

Ticki

8

Sorry, what's GHD?

I think the conversation is getting more serious than either of us intended. I just don't think that sex is necessary to make a relationship more legitimate and therefore wouldn't be something to make anyone want to rush a marriage. Particularly given that most colleges aren't overly happy about students getting married during their degrees.

Out of interest, do you think that getting married would be much more of a committment (or a detriment to studies) than any other serious relationship? I'm not sure whether colleges are actually opposed to marriage itself or if they just can't offer married couples accommodation. I wish I'd read the matriculation form more carefully now, but unlike Corpus I don't think Sidney actually make you promise not to get married. I wonder how much this differs across colleges.

green hoodie disease

Oh dear lord no. I hate CICCU as much as anyone. I promise we aren't all like that.

Reply 17008

crana9

2

i know. and I know you're not all rabid sex-mad marrying types either :wink:

ETA: should I change my identity? are my posts an incitement to religious hatred? am i facing jail? :eek:

Reply 17009

Ticki

8

The number of CICCU-hate posts on the Cambridge forum is rather amusing. I suspect you'd not be the only one at risk! Incidentally, I think CICCU have put more people off Christianity than they've converted. Should they not take the hint?

Reply 17010

crana9

2

I'm hoping they will eventually be smited (smote?) for disservices to God.

Reply 17011

Fluffstar

crana9

green hoodie disease

No different from BSD (boatie stash disease)

Reply 17012

MadNatSci

12

Ticki

Who are all these people? Surely not all Sidneyites? I assume one is Cathy but can't guess the others.

Cathy is one, a girl from my old school is another and a third year historian (Elizabeth) is the other - though she and Richard are leaving it for a couple of years before they actually tie the knot. She's still engaged though...

Huh? What?

crana9

ETA: I do think the university should butt out of students' private lives more though. like.. you should be allowed to have a job if you want one (ha! didn't stop me!). if it interferes with your studies then sanctions should be applied in exactly the same way as they would be if it was rowing or acting that is interfering with your studies. you shouldn't have to ask your college's permission to get married, but equally you shouldn't expect a whole load of privileges if you do get married. they should scrap the residence requirement as it's clearly a load of *******s. as long as you go to your lectures and supervisions and stuff it's your own business what you do and where you stay the night outside of that time.

Fair points really - I spend far more than 6 hours a week rowing and am allowed to; if I chose to work in a pub for a couple of evenings instead of that, how much difference would it make? And I'm only a minor boatie - people like Will know how much first boat takes over your life.

Dunno about the residence requirement, I do know it's silly stopping people going away for the weekend as long as it's not affecting their work, and to be honest I doubt I could find anywhere to rent in Cambridge that would be cheaper than college accom.

The debate as to whether boatie stash is more/less offensive than CICCU hoodies can continue though :wink:

Reply 17015

Poc ar buile

Helenia

Dunno about the residence requirement, I do know it's silly stopping people going away for the weekend as long as it's not affecting their work

Girton are even sillier than most about that I think.. Isabel said her tutor had a go at her (as well as for leaving a day or two before the end of second term) for spending too much time in Wolfie even though that is part of Girton Colege. She said that that would be taken as time away when counting towards keeping term or whatever they call it.. That leads to all sorts of stupid scenarios like having nights frantically writing essays in computer rooms/reading rooms counted as time away..

On the other hand - I did spend a lot of time away from college at weekends (as well as my night-time trips round the country) and it really did bugger me up and, among other things, made me have to degrade. I shall not be doing that stuff so much again! :wink:

I think that there should be a nice compromise found between banning people from going away without requesting premission from tutors, DOSmen, senior tutors, etc.., and allowing them to do whatever they want. I have no idea what that compromise should be though.. :confused:

Reply 17016

crana9

2

Helenia

Dunno about the residence requirement, I do know it's silly stopping people going away for the weekend as long as it's not affecting their work, and to be honest I doubt I could find anywhere to rent in Cambridge that would be cheaper than college accom.

That's not really the point, as long as you live within a certain distance of St Mary's and it's "approved" it still fills the residence req even if it's not living in college-owned accommodation. It's more about being able to go home / stay with boyfriend or girlfriend etc.

Pol - to me there is a difference between the stuff you were doing and, say, a student parent who doesn't live with his or her children and goes home every weekend to see them, or someone who goes home every weekend to see their SO etc. I think students should be given the responsibility to make their own decisions about things like how much time they can afford to spend away from college, although with advice and guidelines from the college/university. If they screw up and handle it wrongly and ignore the advice that's their problem and they have to deal with the consequences.

Reply 17017

crana9

2

Fluffstar

No different from BSD (boatie stash disease)

i dont really notice that;. possibly because boaties attend lectures less.

Reply 17018

Helenia

20

crana9

That's not really the point, as long as you live within a certain distance of St Mary's and it's "approved" it still fills the residence req even if it's not living in college-owned accommodation. It's more about being able to go home / stay with boyfriend or girlfriend etc.

Pol - to me there is a difference between the stuff you were doing and, say, a student parent who doesn't live with his or her children and goes home every weekend to see them, or someone who goes home every weekend to see their SO etc. I think students should be given the responsibility to make their own decisions about things like how much time they can afford to spend away from college, although with advice and guidelines from the college/university. If they screw up and handle it wrongly and ignore the advice that's their problem and they have to deal with the consequences.

Ah, fair enough. Well, as long as it's not affecting your study I agree that there's no reason why it should be a problem. There would probably need to be some system of signing out though, for fire/insurance regs etc. That would also mean that if someone was doing badly academically and their DoS could see they'd been away X number of weekends they could do something about it, but I'm sure most people could manage just fine (a lot do, just without telling college :wink:

)

Reply 17019

crana9

2

Yeah, exactly. That's another problem with the current system - there's a disincentive to sign out because of the hassle of getting exeats plus the residence requirements - so people usually just go without signing out. More people would probably sign out (keeping in with fire regs) if you could go whenever you wanted, without permission.

Cambridge Chat (previously New Cambridge Students Entry 2004)

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