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    Hey guys i have witten an essay on death of a salesman, answering the question:“Miller doesn’t present the downfall of a tragic hero, but the pathetic demise of a small man” discuss.
    I would be really happy if you could read through it, give me a mark, and give me feedback .
    PS. MY EXAM IS TMRW
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    Where is the essay?
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    (Original post by maggiedavies)
    Where is the essay?
    oops sorry
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  1. File Type: docx death of a salesman essay task 1.docx (147.6 KB, 61 views)
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    (Original post by samsun12345)
    Hey guys i have witten an essay on death of a salesman, answering the question:“Miller doesn’t present the downfall of a tragic hero, but the pathetic demise of a small man” discuss.
    I would be really happy if you could read through it, give me a mark, and give me feedback .
    PS. MY EXAM IS TMRW
    I've read the essay. A few points (I'm assuming this is for AQA Lit B):

    1. Don't self-reference - I'd drop the "I think" or "I believe."
    2. Your comparison to other texts or the context of drama is weak if not absent.
    3. The introduction is an unecessary waste of time - the topic of the question wouldn't be worth answering if it wasn't controversial or you could take multiple points of view on it.
    4. Similarly the conclusion is a bit weak - spend more time on this and refine the argument.
    5. The thread of the argument is fairly clear.
    7. You've misinterpreted his hamartia. Hamartia is a quality not an event. Willy's hamartia is his pride and ability to delude others. Errors of judgement are just errors of judgement. Tragedy stems from it - it marks the start of the hero's fall.
    8. A small man - a "low man" - Loman?
    9. Pathetic - look at audience reaction or perception. Is there catharsis.
    10. Look at staging.
    11. Use of evidence is fairly good.

    If I was a marker I'd give you a Band 4 or high Band 3 mark.

    Would others agree with me?
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    (Original post by Atomix330)
    I've read the essay. A few points (I'm assuming this is for AQA Lit B):

    1. Don't self-reference - I'd drop the "I think" or "I believe."
    2. Your comparison to other texts or the context of drama is weak if not absent.
    3. The introduction is an unecessary waste of time - the topic of the question wouldn't be worth answering if it wasn't controversial or you could take multiple points of view on it.
    4. Similarly the conclusion is a bit weak - spend more time on this and refine the argument.
    5. The thread of the argument is fairly clear.
    7. You've misinterpreted his hamartia. Hamartia is a quality not an event. Willy's hamartia is his pride and ability to delude others. Errors of judgement are just errors of judgement. Tragedy stems from it - it marks the start of the hero's fall.
    8. A small man - a "low man" - Loman?
    9. Pathetic - look at audience reaction or perception. Is there catharsis.
    10. Look at staging.
    11. Use of evidence is fairly good.

    If I was a marker I'd give you a Band 4 or high Band 3 mark.

    Would others agree with me?
    Yes thank you, are you doing the same exam board. Can i pm you some of my other essays for feedback?
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    Sorry I'm currently on a spare computer that doesn't have Microsoft Word downloaded so I can't open it,
    unless you want to copy and paste it as a reply and I'll read it after I've done some revision!
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    (Original post by samsun12345)
    Yes thank you, are you doing the same exam board. Can i pm you some of my other essays for feedback?
    If you wish. But I might not reply to all of them. Send me the two best.
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    I d give it a Band 3 there needs to be more closer links to tragedy but I like the way you referred it spbsck to question for each point
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    (Original post by maggiedavies)
    Sorry I'm currently on a spare computer that doesn't have Microsoft Word downloaded so I can't open it,
    unless you want to copy and paste it as a reply and I'll read it after I've done some revision!
    I believe the statement “Miller doesn’t present the downfallof a tragic hero, but the pathetic demise of a small man” is very controversialbecause there are some traits that Willy Loman acquires that may be viewed astraits of a small man rather than a Tragic hero, such as his poor backgroundand unsuccessful career opposingly he might present the downfall of a tragichero based purely on the fact that he is slowly “dying” as Linda states. Aristotle’s belief is that in order for a tragic hero toexperience his downfall the character must make an error of judgement(hamartia). Willy Loman is a man of many faulty judgements, the main error ofjudgement being his strong belief in the American Dream. He didn’t make realityhis point of focus and allowed himself to be drifted into a world of imaginingswhich puts not only him in danger buthis family too, this is represented clearly through his driving. Rather thanfocusing on driving he has “strange thoughts” and “stares off into the scenery”this results in him ‘crashing the car’. His belief in the American Dream isfurther developed through his admiration for his brother Ben, he doesn’t admirehis brothers character or success he admires Ben’s quickly gained wealth. Willystops at nothing to explain how Ben went “into a jungle” and “made a fortune”,this may explain why he is constantly “observing the scenery…the thick trees”. One other major faulty judgement Willy Loman commits is howhe has an affair with a mystery woman when he is a married man. We see him showthis woman a lot more affection than he shows Linda “he pulls her…kisses herroughly” and he also treats this lady with more respect than he shows Linda, ashe is always happy around her to the point that he even gifts her. It isobvious to anyone that this mystery woman had a large impact on Willy Loman;during his conversation with his wife his mind wanders off to memories withthis woman intending that he would rather be listening to the woman talk thanhis wife. Although we see a hint of anagnorsis in Willy in this part of theplay as he tells Linda he’ll “make it up to her”, it may seem very minor butWilly is a character of pride-a characteristic of a tragic hero-and thereforewe do not see him experience anagnorsis much throughout the course of the play. On the other hand he is “pathetic” because all he everwanted was to be a good father role for his sons since his father wasn’t muchof a father to him but he ended up doing the complete opposite. He tells Biff“just be careful with the girls Biff… because girls, ya’know they believe whatyou tell’em”, this isn’t really advice a “good” father would give his son.Willy expresses how he is careless to the reality that his son is having hisway with women, that phrase also has an underlying message: It connotes howwilly may be deceiving Linda since he thinks girls are so gullible. Biff andHappy do end up following their fathers advice because as time progresses Biffbecomes ‘too rough with the girls’ and Happy becomes a ‘womaniser’. Some may sympathisewith Willy and say that he has had no father figure in his life and istherefore unsure of how to bring to life simple daily parental tasks. This carries me onto my next point, that Willy was abandonedby his father so he isn’t a character of nobility and stature, which are traitsa tragic hero must obtain. He is a man of lower class, ‘a common man’. Hehasn’t got a noble soul let alone a noble lifestyle, if he had obtained suchnobility he wouldn’t have made as many errors as he has, such as cheating onhis wife or encouraging his boys to steal. Nevertheless Miller argued that thatWilly Loman being a ‘common man’ was powerful because at the time of the play,there were millions of ‘common men’ who similarly to Willy were veryhardworking and would start their journey with dreams of success and wealth butend up lost and defeated. So more of the audience are able to identify withWilly Loman and lead to an increase in tragedy of the play by earning sympathyand empathy from the people of the audience. In conclusion I feel that the character Willy Loman isneither a Tragic Hero or a small man but a mixture between the two as he hasobtained traits from both sides and therefore cannot be said to be either oneof those.
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    (Original post by Atomix330)
    7. You've misinterpreted his hamartia. Hamartia is a quality not an event. Willy's hamartia is his pride and ability to delude others.
    That's debatable.

    I might say that his hamartia is his naivety or his insecurity.
 
 
 
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