Why do men still get married?

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Nidhoggr
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People are more likely now more than ever to get divorced (50% divorce rate), and the man pretty much always gets screwed.

In this day age, the degree of faith marriage deserves is about the same degree of faith you'd give to a bet made on the outcome of a football match - worse even.

Imagine Man U are playing Chelsea, and your friend proposes a bet on who will win. You think Man U, she thinks Chelsea, but rules of the bet are if Man U win you keep the money you bet but dont get any of the money your friend bet, and if Chelsea win your friend keeps her money and gets half of your money.

Who in their right mind would take that bet?......Exactly, no one, so why do men still get married?
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Sycamores
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Why do you seem to be so sexist and think the 'man' always gets screwed? I'm assuming you're going by the fact you think the man makes more than the woman?

When a couple gets divorced, both parties get half of what the other has as they are accustomed to the lifestyle they had when they were together. So, realistically, they're just halving their assets that they SHARED and parting ways.
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Kutie Karen
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(Original post by Nidhoggr)
People are more likely now more than ever to get divorced (50% divorce rate), and the man pretty much always gets screwed.

In this day age, the degree of faith marriage deserves is about the same degree of faith you'd give to a bet made on the outcome of a football match - worse even.

Imagine Man U are playing Chelsea, and your friend proposes a bet on who will win. You think Man U, she thinks Chelsea, but rules of the bet are if Man U win you keep the money you bet but dont get any of the money your friend bet, and if Chelsea win your friend keeps her money and gets half of your money.

Who in their right mind would take that bet?......Exactly, no one, so why do men still get married?

Why are the terms of this bet so twisted? Marriage and divorce are not like that.
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Twinpeaks
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(Original post by Sycamores)
Why do you seem to be so sexist and think the 'man' always gets screwed? I'm assuming you're going by the fact you think the man makes more than the woman?

When a couple gets divorced, both parties get half of what the other has as they are accustomed to the lifestyle they had when they were together. So, realistically, they're just halving their assets that they SHARED and parting ways.

This. It's hilarious how people make threads ranting about a legal topic of which they clearly know absolutely nothing about.

It's quite clear that OP hasn't the faintest experience of divorce in his sheltered little life, but hasn't made the slightest effort to educate himself on the matter.
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Betelgeuse-
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(Original post by Sycamores)
Why do you seem to be so sexist and think the 'man' always gets screwed? I'm assuming you're going by the fact you think the man makes more than the woman?

When a couple gets divorced, both parties get half of what the other has as they are accustomed to the lifestyle they had when they were together. So, realistically, they're just halving their assets that they SHARED and parting ways.
The man DOES ALWAYS GET SCREWED if there is children involved
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Nidhoggr
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(Original post by Twinpeaks)
This. It's hilarious how people make threads ranting about a legal topic of which they clearly know absolutely nothing about.

It's quite clear that OP hasn't the faintest experience of divorce in his sheltered little life, but hasn't made the slightest effort to educate himself on the matter.
brb studying law for three years and then doing postgrad law degree with specialism in marital law so I can be qualified to make this thread :rolleyes:
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BOOMBOOMM
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Wth is this meant to mean. People still have ambitions about having a family.

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Nidhoggr
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(Original post by BOOMBOOMM)
Wth is this meant to mean. People still have ambitions about having a family.

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http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/poli...k-by-2016.html

You dont need to be married to have children. In fact most people are having kids out of wedlock. Also, you shouldnt need a piece of paper (marriage certificate) to make you be a good parent to your kid / support your family
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Jd_uk
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(Original post by Betelgeuse-)
The man DOES ALWAYS GET SCREWED if there is children involved
Yep. Seen some terrible things happen to guys with kids, even when the woman has been in the wrong/cheated etc, she has got the better deal. The law is completely wrong and has to change. I think it will when people realise how feminism etc has gone way too far, but it is 10 years off still.

Edit...to those women who see things like this and disagree by default - imagine it happening to your male relatives...brothers, future sons etc. Women get a very easy deal in this world in many areas but feminists only ever want to shout about the things which are difficult for them.
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Shumaya
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(Original post by Betelgeuse-)
The man DOES ALWAYS GET SCREWED if there is children involved
In what way?
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Betelgeuse-
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(Original post by Jd_uk)
Yep. Seen some terrible things happen to guys with kids, even when the woman has been in the wrong/cheated etc, she has got the better deal. The law is completely wrong and has to change. I think it will when people realise how feminism etc has gone way too far, but it is 10 years off still.
Meet a man with a house and good job. Marry, have kids. Hop on blokes **** from work... take house and 70% of assets and the kids.

Easy game
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Shumaya
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(Original post by Jd_uk)
Yep. Seen some terrible things happen to guys with kids, even when the woman has been in the wrong/cheated etc, she has got the better deal. The law is completely wrong and has to change. I think it will when people realise how feminism etc has gone way too far, but it is 10 years off still.

Edit...to those women who see things like this and disagree by default - imagine it happening to your male relatives...brothers, future sons etc. Women get a very easy deal in this world in many areas but feminists only ever want to shout about the things which are difficult for them.
Which law do you think should be changed?
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username1854431
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Because most of us believe in love, and nothing you will say is gonna take that away from us :moon:
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Jd_uk
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(Original post by Shumaya)
Which law do you think should be changed?
Common law, not statutory law.

It is not so much a written law as it is the attitude of the courts and legal professionals in general towards men. You're speaking to someone with legal qualifications and some (albeit limited) work experience in family law by the way.

Do you think it is right that a woman can cause her breakup with infidelity and still get custody of the kids in the majority of cases? I remember having to support a guy in work as he cried at his desk because all he wanted was to see his kids and for his ex to stop messing him about. Every time she would change the dates that he could see them with no notice at all and in order for him to put a stop to it he had to spend thousands going to court which he didn't have. This woman had physically beaten him towards the end of their relationship - he came to work with a black eye etc. Another guy i worked with, his wife later came out that she was lesbian - left him for a woman, took the kids - he saw them one day a week and again she messed him about, changed dates, treated him like sh*t. Why? Because she could.
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anarchism101
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(Original post by Jd_uk)
The law is completely wrong and has to change.
What law do you think has to change specifically?

In terms of spousal maintenance, the law has been changed - to men's benefit. It used to be that only husbands could be ordered to pay; now the highest-earning partner can be regardless of gender.

From what I've heard, there are two arguments about why division of assets is allegedly unfair to men. Firstly, the more genuine one - that the mother generally gets primary child custody, and whoever has primary custody generally gets favoured in the division of assets. This is true, but the custody issue is a bit of a self-fulfilling prophecy - the vast majority (>90%) of custody questions in divorces are resolved long before they have to go to a court ruling, often because men simply don't try to win primary custody. Some will say that's because men believe they will lose anyway, and don't want to waste time and money. Others will say it's because the men in question were too indifferent and clearly didn't see their children as a high priority if they weren't prepared to fight for them.

The second argument generally involves some claim that men are entitled to more based on income or some argument that matrimonial assets should really be regarded as the man's (all of these assume the man is the higher-earning). This argument completely misses anything unquantifiable, like opportunity costs, externalities, and most crucially, how a marriage works - to put a long story short, it's a bit like insisting gifts you gave to someone are actually your property.
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Jd_uk
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(Original post by anarchism101)
What law do you think has to change specifically?
Did you read my post above?

It's common law/precedent and a general attitude in the courts which strongly favours women in custody cases (that old fashioned and BS 'a child must be with its mother' attitude). Additionally, most family solicitors are women and unfortunately there will always be same gender bias I think. As I said, I've seen men well and truly screwed over and trust me it was not for lack of trying. These guys spent thousands that they didn't have trying to get the most basic rights while the b*tch of a mother laughed about how easily she could mess him around while seeing her new partner that she'd left him for.
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Nidhoggr
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(Original post by Betelgeuse-)
Meet a man with a house and good job. Marry, have kids. Hop on blokes **** from work... take house and 70% of assets and the kids.

Easy game
You forgot the part where she breaks out in fake tears in the divorce court proceedings and judge falls for it hook line and sinker

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fallen_acorns
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The 'It wont happen to us' Scenario is strong with people still..

We cant help but feel that its everyone elses problem except ours.

--

In theory there Is nothing wrong with marriage, I still think that as humans marriage is in our best interest, and for society/country its important.

The problem is in divorce, Our devorce laws a ****ed up. The poster above hit the nail on the head.

Every single devorce that I have witnessed through famiily and friends has been messed up. Usually in favour of the wife.. but not always. my female cousin got devorced and in that case her bastered of an ex husband still manage to screw her over, thanks to manipulating his work status etc, getting out of paying child benifits, and so on.

--
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ElaArslan
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(Original post by Nidhoggr)
so why do men still get married?
Cultural reasons? Marriage is actually decreasing as there is less religious believers (secular society) higher expectations, higher age expectancy, women becoming more independent etc etc. The number of people who cohabit is increasing
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DrLovejoy
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(Original post by Nidhoggr)
People are more likely now more than ever to get divorced (50% divorce rate), and the man pretty much always gets screwed.

In this day age, the degree of faith marriage deserves is about the same degree of faith you'd give to a bet made on the outcome of a football match - worse even.

Imagine Man U are playing Chelsea, and your friend proposes a bet on who will win. You think Man U, she thinks Chelsea, but rules of the bet are if Man U win you keep the money you bet but dont get any of the money your friend bet, and if Chelsea win your friend keeps her money and gets half of your money.

Who in their right mind would take that bet?......Exactly, no one, so why do men still get married?
Personally I don't want to get married because I like to handle my own affairs and I don't need the state interfering in my life. I don't need the state giving someone a big stick to threaten me with to influence my behaviours.

It is true that it's usually women wanting marriage and most men kind of relent at a certain point in time.




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