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    I've been going out with a girl for a year. It isn't working at all in my view but she is talking about marriage and kids. What is the kindest possible way to let her down gently and how do you build up the nerves to deliver such damaging news to somone?
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    There is no easy 'gentle' way lmfao. She's going to take it badly regardless. Just make sure you do it face-to-face.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I've been going out with a girl for a year. It isn't working at all in my view but she is talking about marriage and kids. What is the kindest possible way to let her down gently and how do you build up the nerves to deliver such damaging news to somone?
    give hints such as you need time apart. if she dont get it then say it to her straight up
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    Sit down with her and tell her that you don't feel the same way and it is not working out.
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    Whatever you do, make sure you're honest and you don't leave her with any expectations that you don't plan to meet. The worst thing ever is when people leave the other person with 'we'll still talk and see what happens,' like there might be a chance of getting back together or something when there is no intention of that happening. It should go without saying, but make sure you do it in person. You'd be surprised how many people nowadays coward out and do it via text or something.
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    I am not going to lie to you, this is going to suck. It is part of growing up though, and learning to conduct yourself with dignity. Do it face to face. Do not talk about 'time apart' or any ********. Break it off and do it completely, don't give her false hope as that is mean. Don't get angry, she is going to hurt more than you will, because she hasn't seen this coming. Be kind, like you would want if the tables were turned.

    Then, when it is done, go and do something to reward yourself for having done something that was necessary although unpleasant. Good luck, your future is waiting for you.
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    Don't do the "we need some time apart" or the break up over text or the dropping hints because its the nastiest way to do it. Meet up with her and tell her the truth and let her ask you questions about it and make sure she knows its not her fault, it just doesn't seem to be working and that you don't want to hurt her. Your much more likely to leave on good terms if you let her ask you about it and explain it to her and make sure everything is clear so you don't lead her on.
    Good Luck
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    I want to do it face to face but she always specified she never wants to be broken up to face to face. She's said before she would much rather be dumped via text.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I want to do it face to face but she always specified she never wants to be broken up to face to face. She's said before she would much rather be dumped via text.
    you need to do it face to face even if she dont want it. Best way to do it otherwise she will have a go at you for breaking up via text. Trust me been there before
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    If that's what she prefers, then do it over text - but be honest and direct.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I've been going out with a girl for a year. It isn't working at all in my view but she is talking about marriage and kids. What is the kindest possible way to let her down gently and how do you build up the nerves to deliver such damaging news to somone?
    Say it straight up and say why,
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    If the relationship, at least from her point of view, is heading towards marriage and a life together, then text doesn't really sound like an appropriate option. I've said the same before. I hate confrontation and dealing with awkward situations, so I'd rather it be ended by text or something, but that would be for a very new relationship. She's in this relationship seriously. She deserves the respect of you doing it properly, as I'm sure you agree. My ex ended it over Facebook messenger and I felt so disrespected. I had questions that I wanted answered, and the answers he gave me were so hard to understand through text because of all the meaning behind everything. It's like how sarcasm doesn't show well through text. The same would go for meaning well in a situation like this. I really would do it in person, in a neutral but quiet setting.
 
 
 
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