Hi guys,
Just wondering if anyone has ever been in a similar situation to that which i'm in right now.
Studying law at Oxford Uni, and absolutely hate it. I'm really happy with friends and with the place (mostly) but i resent every hour I spend reading and cannot find the motivation to do my work on time or to get to grips with the material. The workload is insane, as i'm sure you all know, but would be manageable if I was interested.
I did science A levels and for the entirety of sixth form was deliberating between pursing medicine and law.
It sounds like the most ridiculous, pathetic complaint. I am well aware of how bloody lucky I am to have managed to land a spot at Oxford to study law, and to discuss this with friends or tutors here makes me feel unbelievably guilty. Someone else could have taken this spot. I know.
But the course is long, and so so hard, and I have a year abroad studying law in a different country, and i hate it. Every case, every article... I have 0 passion. I even hate the idea of working in the law.
I detest the money-centric, selfish nature of so much of what i read about. I don't care who gets what compensation or why the rule of law isn't a part of the constitution.
I am insanely jealous of my friends doing science degrees. I don't go a day, or night, without thinking this through a million times over and imagining some scenario where i could somehow change course. Im genuinely so unhappy and feel so guilty about it. And thats not even starting on how my family would feel if i dropped out
What the hell do you do in this situation? I have no idea. It would be easier if i hated Oxford too, but i don't. Feel like such a crap person.
I know my options are
a) get on with it (most likely). and either fall in love with the subject, just power through, or look into grad medicine or something, though this is ridiculously competitive
b) some kind of internal transfer onto anything else, though this is impossible given the time of year it is and just coz
c) quit now, spend summer forming an application and applying for entry into a new course for 2017. having already had a year off due to indecision though I would be 21, nearly 22 on entry.
I am already in so much debt after one year i literally don't care about an extra 9,000. all i know is that a law degree at oxford is possibly the most energy and time consuming, soul destroying, academically intense thing anyone could wish to do, and the thought of attempting it without a shred of passion makes me cry every bloody night. But it is also so prestigious and i am so lucky to have this opportunity, so I can't exactly just quit.
Anyone ever felt like this? Or if anyone can offer any words of wisdom I would greatly appreciate it.
Thanks so much. Also if anyone is looking at applying for law, I am more than happy to chat to you/ send you examples of what I do/ give interview tips etc etc etc. Nobody should even contemplate starting a law degree without full knowledge of what it involves.
Thanks again x