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Why don't men like smart, strong, independent women?

People around me often label me as strong, independent, smart, kind, and acerbic. I'm 20 years old and I hate to admit that no one ever asked me out. If you're gonna say perhaps it's because of your look, I'd answer that I'm neither pretty nor ugly, just okay.
Do men ever tried to find out why some women became strong and independent? I was once that sweet, gentle woman. But at some point in life, when you realised that you're the only one that you can rely on, being strong is the only choice you have, you'll grow up overnight...

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Original post by Anonymous
People around me often label me as strong, independent, smart, kind, and acerbic. I'm 20 years old and I hate to admit that no one ever asked me out. If you're gonna say perhaps it's because of your look, I'd answer that I'm neither pretty nor ugly, just okay.
Do men ever tried to find out why some women became strong and independent? I was once that sweet, gentle woman. But at some point in life, when you realised that you're the only one that you can rely on, being strong is the only choice you have, you'll grow up overnight...


Naturally guy is the dominant and girl is the one protected, caring etc... independent and strong will cause issues in a relationship by miles.
Nah, guys actually hate those qualities, they much prefer weak, dependent, idiotic, cruel women. Acerbic is actually your only good quality, guys loved to be nagged with *****y, sarcastic comments.
Look at it this way - people who you want to ask you out will be attracted to the fact that you're strong and smart.

In our twisted culture, women are sometimes expected to be and act a certain way, and if someone breaks that norm, people brainwashed by popular culture will be less likely to be attracted to them or desire to initiate a relationship with them. Don't worry however, it happens for everyone at some point and you shouldn't worry about when it will happen, but how and with whom.

Also, since the stereotypical norm is for men to ask women out, why don't you ask someone out? I understand you might want to be approached, but if you want a relationship, it's only natural to do so. It's not that all people around you don't like who you are or who you might be, but asking someone out can be difficult, especially if they're as strong and as confident.
Reply 4
Many do.

Just make sure you don't completely abandon your feminine qualities.

Why not start asking men out?

:wink:
Original post by CheetahCurtis
If you are a smart, strong, independent woman why don't you ask other people out?


Someone had to tell that woman. Plus these 'strong independent women' have such a chip on their shoulder. Can you imagine a man go around telling people that he's 'strong' and 'independent'. I would just cringe.
I used to have the same problem, i'm quite strong willed too. However even though i'm not a man, i am assuming that some men will get scared of your personality and be afraid that they're going to get turned away. The only solution is that you have got to ask the guy you want out, especially if he's shy.
I like them. Many other men do too. You just got to find them. :smile:
Today's Western, feminist, liberal, hedonistic society has its basis in lies, dishonesty and illusions. It doesn't matter where you go, from the villages to the cities, feminists push 'girl power' and if you're a man that doesn't find that attractive or reasonable, then you're a patriarchal misogynyst, and if you're a girl that doesn't like that or doesn't want to be that, then you're a self hater.

The truth is that most men find petite, thin, shy, homely and chaste women attractive, and most men who want children want a women like that to raise them. At the same time, most men settle, because well, they aren't much better. Modern society produces effeminate, weak and submissive men. But this means that strong masculine men often have their pick of the ladies, and I'm quite certain they go for the cute feminine girls.
Men like to be the dominant ones. Its in their brains, the patriarchy, society, forms them into someone who thinks they are strong and powerful. Lots of men chose to date girls who are shorter, and younger, less intelligent, etc. It fuels their egos and makes them feel powerful.
Reply 10
Smart, strong and independent is attractive and traits to exploit. Not sure about acerbic, only really heard that applied to John Lennon, and I think he was a bit arrogant and irritating.

As to the being asked out, sadly it's only the pretty set (girls and guys) where this is delivered on a plate. With just ok you have to work hard to get a good partner. Keep the faith.
Reply 11
[QUOTE=Anonymous;65665445]Nah, guys actually hate those qualities, they much prefer weak, dependent, idiotic, cruel women. Acerbic is actually your only good quality, guys loved to be nagged with *****y, sarcastic comments.
I think this is an inaccurate stereotype.
We do?

Perhaps you're not putting yourself out there.

Actually people probably don't like the acerbic part, but you'd be a perfect match for me.
(edited 7 years ago)
When you describe yourself as strong and independent it's extremely off putting.
Not because it's intimidating like some posters have suggested, but because it comes off as so try hard and cringy.
If you're strong and independent act it, you don't need to announce it. The fact you're waiting for a guy to ask you out really implies you aren't that strong and independent.
I'd prefer someone who is still smart but not as independent or strong haha
Don't really mind tho, the overall personality matters more
If guys don't ask you out there probably just scared, not saying you're scary, but are scared of rejection, as you've got this strong, independent vibe, tends to get people slightly worried that you'll have more power and some guys don't like that.

I'd say I'm quite a independent woman, but I love socialising, although I'm a bit younger than you I've been asked out, but don't worry, just be yourself and any decent guy who likes you will have the balls to ask you out.
I'd like a woman who is more submissive and caring and smart but not as smart as me
Original post by epage
Men like to be the dominant ones. Its in their brains, the patriarchy, society, forms them into someone who thinks they are strong and powerful. Lots of men chose to date girls who are shorter, and younger, less intelligent, etc. It fuels their egos and makes them feel powerful.


Women like you who think they know all about men, but don't know **** about them as you've clearly shown are the most unattractive type of women. It's not the "patriarchy" is biology honey.
Original post by Anonymous
People around me often label me as strong, independent, smart, kind, and acerbic. I'm 20 years old and I hate to admit that no one ever asked me out. If you're gonna say perhaps it's because of your look, I'd answer that I'm neither pretty nor ugly, just okay.
Do men ever tried to find out why some women became strong and independent? I was once that sweet, gentle woman. But at some point in life, when you realised that you're the only one that you can rely on, being strong is the only choice you have, you'll grow up overnight...

there's the answer,you're just average. It's obvious that it's more difficult to girls who aren't pretty to attract the attention.
Original post by Dieselblue
Women like you who think they know all about men, but don't know **** about them as you've clearly shown are the most unattractive type of women. It's not the "patriarchy" is biology honey.


Aw, look, you're exerting your power by insulting and swearing, proving my point. I think men that insult women like you are doing are unattractive too, but that could just be me being gay and not caring if you think I'm 'most unattractive.' Don't call me honey, I'm not that sweet.

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