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Overcontrolling parents making me insane.

So I live with my parents and I probably will get hate for this but I don't love them at all and I have no respect for them at all either. Ever since I became a teenager, they verbally abuse me pretty much every day and as a result, I was diagnosed with clinical depression which my parents then called me attention seeking for.

I want to move out for university and I've made that clear to my parents and they've been trying to guilt trip me and telling pretty much anyone who listens that I'm selfish and arrogant for wanting to move out, when all I really just want to do is be free. I'm not allowed to go out with my friends or have a boyfriend or have any form of social media which irritates me because pretty much most of my teenage years are nearly gone and I haven't been allowed to be a normal teenager.

So a few weeks ago, my parents gave me a long lecture because I had told them that after I turned 18, I would start doing whatever I wanted (I'm literally talking of simple things like going out with my mates). They ripped into me and was saying that as long as I should live with them I should obey them and go by their rules. They have said to me that if I don't obey them, I'll be thrown out even though I'm halfway through my A levels and I have no family to fall back on. They are honestly so controlling because they want to take my laptop away after my exams and they monitor my emails. And apparently if I make another email they end up getting a notification.

I've been having even worse bouts of depression than before and I've started to have mental breakdowns because of this and I honestly don't know what to do. I can't move out because I have no family to go to and I have to wait until next year to go to university.

What do I do?
OMG....
I feel really sorry for u.my parents are controlling too but not to that extent.
tbh I don't know what u should do:frown:
I'm extremely sorry.
Have you tried ChildLine? I know it seems cliche and all but they can give you good legal and practical advice. Even if you can't access it at home, try asking at school if you can use a friend's phone, and if you've got a school nurse or counsellor try talking to them. They might just want to bring your parents in and speak to them, but make sure to ask if you can call ChildLine or another support line first so they can advise you. If you think that talking to people about your parents is going to make them abusive towards you, make that clear to your school - do not let them contact your parents about this if you think it's going to go badly.

One important bit of advice - even if you haven't got family to fall back on, make sure that you've got somewhere to go if you need to, even if it's just couchsurfing at your friends' houses. Your parents are verging on abusive now, I'd argue that if they start taking away your methods of communication then they are abusive even if it's not physical, and you really need to make sure you've got a way out if you need one.
Reply 3
Original post by ElspethC
Have you tried ChildLine? I know it seems cliche and all but they can give you good legal and practical advice. Even if you can't access it at home, try asking at school if you can use a friend's phone, and if you've got a school nurse or counsellor try talking to them. They might just want to bring your parents in and speak to them, but make sure to ask if you can call ChildLine or another support line first so they can advise you. If you think that talking to people about your parents is going to make them abusive towards you, make that clear to your school - do not let them contact your parents about this if you think it's going to go badly.

One important bit of advice - even if you haven't got family to fall back on, make sure that you've got somewhere to go if you need to, even if it's just couchsurfing at your friends' houses. Your parents are verging on abusive now, I'd argue that if they start taking away your methods of communication then they are abusive even if it's not physical, and you really need to make sure you've got a way out if you need one.


I tried doing the thing at school a while back but they told my parents :/
Reply 4
I'm literally in the same situation as you.I know you probably don't want to hear this, but the best thing to do is to hang in there for one more year and you'll never have to see those f***ers (ami i allowed to call them that?) again. And I'm guessing you don't have the financial means to move out right now, so the best thing to do is to get a job and save up until uni.
Reply 5
Original post by jenyjam
I'm literally in the same situation as you.I know you probably don't want to hear this, but the best thing to do is to hang in there for one more year and you'll never have to see those f***ers (ami i allowed to call them that?) again. And I'm guessing you don't have the financial means to move out right now, so the best thing to do is to get a job and save up until uni.


Yeah you can call them that. I actually told them that I wanted to work in the summer but they're not letting me work part time during school. It's got to the point where I'm considering other jobs (not saying what) to have enough money so I can just try moving out or have enough money to keep me through university.
Reply 6
UPDATE- So I went to an open day yesterday and my mum looked at the accommodation and was calling me selfish and arrogant with no values and no need to actually work hard at uni. She's told me to apply for all London unis so I stay at home but I've decided that I'm going to do the complete opposite and apply for unis far away from London.
Reply 7
Original post by Anonymous
UPDATE- So I went to an open day yesterday and my mum looked at the accommodation and was calling me selfish and arrogant with no values and no need to actually work hard at uni. She's told me to apply for all London unis so I stay at home but I've decided that I'm going to do the complete opposite and apply for unis far away from London.

That's really brave of you. I hope all goes well

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