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    someone could only want you when you don't want them? And that as soon as you start to show them your love and affection they go off you and start to look elsewhere?

    I feel that I'm in this position.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    someone could only want you when you don't want them? And that as soon as you start to show them your love and affection they go off you and start to look elsewhere?

    I feel that I'm in this position.
    I think it is possible. If you've ever heard of 'thrill of the chase', then that's.. similar, I guess. Or that someone wants you, not when you're interested in them but when you're actually with someone else. Human nature is very strange.

    There is such a thing as coming on too strongly though - but I may just be interpreting 'love and affection' in a slightly different way to how you mean.

    And I guess, yeah.. if you know 100% that someone likes you, then.. I dunno, things might go down differently for the other person versus if they didn't know they felt.

    That's what you have to do if you like them, I guess. Good luck
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    (Original post by SeanFM)
    I think it is possible. If you've ever heard of 'thrill of the chase', then that's.. similar, I guess. Or that someone wants you, not when you're interested in them but when you're actually with someone else. Human nature is very strange.

    There is such a thing as coming on too strongly though - but I may just be interpreting 'love and affection' in a slightly different way to how you mean.

    And I guess, yeah.. if you know 100% that someone likes you, then.. I dunno, things might go down differently for the other person versus if they didn't know they felt.

    That's what you have to do if you like them, I guess. Good luck
    it's more the fact I find it impossible to disguise the way I feel, I have been told I am a very open person so not good at 'playing games'. Unfortunately 'playing games' or 'playing hard to get' seems to be more attractive, but with me, if I really feel something for someone a lot it just shows. I don't think I'm really made for all this 'not giving yourself away' too much thing. I don't know how to only give little bits of me, i always give all of me, that's my problem. Oh well, never mind, I guess there's more to life than relationships
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    Why don't you just ask her how she feels?
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    That's me 100% of the time. Classic glutton for punishment ...
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    (Original post by DanielleT192)
    Why don't you just ask her how she feels?
    I'm a girl, it's a guy, and he's incredibly elusive in explaining how he feels. There's no way of getting a straight answer.
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    (Original post by xobeauty)
    That's me 100% of the time. Classic glutton for punishment ...
    ha, yeah, it's kind of painful though, like someone ripping your arm off haha
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    Plenty of people only want something when it is foreign, exciting and doesn't appear to be an option for them. Most people then lose the taste when they realise it's essentially the same ****.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    ha, yeah, it's kind of painful though, like someone ripping your arm off haha
    You don't realize what your doing at the time?
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    (Original post by Elivercury)
    Plenty of people only want something when it is foreign, exciting and doesn't appear to be an option for them. Most people then lose the taste when they realise it's essentially the same ****.
    yeah that's so true, but on the contrary, i have a lot of (girl) friends who are very good at hooking guys and keeping them with them for years on end. These guys are lovely with them. With me it's all like, I'm told I'm gorgeous and clever and marvellous and all sorts of other nonsense by a guy, but then as soon as I let my guard down and give them the attention they've given me, and probably a lot more on top, i get ditched by them. it's getting really draining and makes me feel really unwanted and worthless. it's really hard every time, because I've put a lot of emotional effort into these guys. it just keeps on happening and I don't think I can take much more. I simply can't help myself from giving a lot to someone if I like them. I don't know how to stop myself. It feels unachievable.
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    (Original post by xobeauty)
    You don't realize what your doing at the time?
    I guess not, no. At the time I'm just thinking 'this feels right' ... then the same crap happens
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    yeah that's so true, but on the contrary, i have a lot of (girl) friends who are very good at hooking guys and keeping them with them for years on end. These guys are lovely with them. With me it's all like, I'm told I'm gorgeous and clever and marvellous and all sorts of other nonsense by a guy, but then as soon as I let my guard down and give them the attention they've given me, and probably a lot more on top, i get ditched by them. it's getting really draining and makes me feel really unwanted and worthless. it's really hard every time, because I've put a lot of emotional effort into these guys. it just keeps on happening and I don't think I can take much more. I simply can't help myself from giving a lot to someone if I like them. I don't know how to stop myself. It feels unachievable.
    Sorry to be harsh, but ultimately this is your issue, not theirs.

    I suggest you learn to manage your expectations and be reasonable when it comes to dating. Unfortunately a lot of dating mishaps and angst simply boil down to two people looking for/expecting different things.

    I suggest you try to build up a list of red flags and use these as your criteria for future dating. It's a rough way to find out what you want, but ultimately getting rejected will point you there.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I guess not, no. At the time I'm just thinking 'this feels right' ... then the same crap happens
    oh..I thought you were the one who doesn't want them till their gone.
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    (Original post by Elivercury)
    Sorry to be harsh, but ultimately this is your issue, not theirs.
    I didn't say it was their issue?

    (Original post by Elivercury)
    I suggest you learn to manage your expectations and be reasonable when it comes to dating. Unfortunately a lot of dating mishaps and angst simply boil down to two people looking for/expecting different things.
    Yeah, like me looking for an emotional connection and them being nice in order to get laid, then ditch me.

    (Original post by Elivercury)
    I suggest you try to build up a list of red flags and use these as your criteria for future dating. It's a rough way to find out what you want, but ultimately getting rejected will point you there.
    Yeah I'm definitely not looking for anymore heartache. Thanks for trying to help
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    (Original post by xobeauty)
    oh..I thought you were the one who doesn't want them till their gone.
    No i meant the other way round, sorry for confusion
 
 
 
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