University and relationships

Reading this thread has just made me feel more positive

My boyfriend is going to Uni tomorrow, (hes in Exeter Im at Oxford) and seeing him drive out of my road when he left mine tonight was one of the most painful things ever. Hurting so bad right now despite having absolutely no tears left to cry !

I start at uni a week later than he does and i know ive just got to give him space to get settled in etc but it will be hard me stuck at home, especially as all my mates have left for uni aswell.
To make matters worse.. he is obviously in mixed halls whereas knowing my luck i was pooled to the all womens college at Oxford... Knowing that he'll be waking up in the same building as other girls whilst im feeling all lonely and stuff in a single sex college is mega mega depressing that i cant even think about it.

But.. like i said this thread helped marginally :P

I was in this exact situation last year - except i was staying at home, whilst he was going to uni.
The night before he left, we just sat in my living room crying and crying and crying.. it was awful, and the most emotionally draining situation ever.
And the first few weeks were SO hard. I mean, we went from spending every day with each other over the summer, to not seeing each other.
Och. Awful.
We ended up seeing each other every weekend, purely because it was just too hard to go any longer [luckily i had the freedom to go up there so often, and he's only 2 hours away from home]. But just the feeling of him being away.. having such a great time, meeting new people.. while i was at home.. doing crappy a-levels, when all i wanted to do was leave.
it got easier though. although every time we saw each other for that first term we'd argue - usually because i'd be jealous - because of the stress of everything.
Eventually it just became like i was living for that friday night when i'd be going to stay with him up in bristol [i'd go straight from college] or when he'd be coming home.. It was weird.. like.. that's all i'd think about during the week.
But yeah, some of the best times of my life were when i was visiting him - it was just so.. nice to be with him.
Time apart really does make you appreciate things more.

So we're still together now, and thankfully, i'm going to the same uni now =D

My boyfriend has just finished his first year at uni, and I'm really happy that we made it.
I agree with Hispanic in that in some ways I think its harder when one person is left behind, especially at the beginning when my boyfriend was creating a whole new life for himself, I was stuck at home with the same old people and the same old routine, obviously really wanting him to be happy, but feeling quite down.
Strangely enough me and my boyfriend had only been together a little under 2 months before he left, we met through a friend and I suppose I just assumed it was a summer fling, and I didn't want to "hold him back" if you like, but he was so keen to give it a go, and so was I. Obviously its really difficult for couples who have been together for a long time, but being in that "honeymoon" stage of the relationship meant I really did miss him.
Also, like Hispanic, all my boyfriend's close friends, the ones he's going to live with, were in a relationship at the start of uni, but have now all broken up- one couple had been together for over 3 years!
So really I think it depends on the couple, not only how much you want it to work obviously, but how university changes you as people. Its almost inevitable you're going to change, but as long as your relationship changes and grows too, I definitely think its possible!

I even know of people who have stayed together while living in different countries, so yeah, it can definitely be done.

you give me hope by saying that

From my experience, very few LDRs last much longer than the first term. Sad as it may be, be prepared for you both to go your own ways.

Only if you don't have the commitment. It's perfectly manageable if you really love each other. Cambridge-Bristol. Visits every other w/e, phone/email/msn everyday. It's do-able

My girlfriend lives in Germany, I live in England...that's 480 miles and we've been together for over a year. There's some hope for you!

Do u guys meet up at all? how do u normally keep in contact?