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I want to live at home during Uni-is it a bad idea?

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I have always been a 'home bird'-I like to stay close to home with my parents/dogs/siblings etc, so I am considering living at home during Uni. The primary reason is that I have a feeling I'll be really, really homesick if I lived in halls. So I was wondering if any of you guys commute? If so, could you tell me what it's like-do you have lots of friends/do you regret it/what are the pros and cons? Thank you!

It all depends on your budget and the length of your commute, and which is better for you: home or campus. It's up to you, not anyone else's experiences. These people exalting the halls experience could be more sociable, could have better flatmates, could have better finances, could end up at better halls than you, a better uni, no offense. But you're you.

It's a total lie you will be missing out on anything living at home lol the experience isn't any less depending on your ethics of how involved you get. There are people who've gone away and didn't gain a thing, stayed home and gained so much.

As far as getting to and back from events, it's called public transport, cabs...nothing's stopping you especially if you live in a city and go to a campus nearby, what's the issue since you'd take cabs and transport for everything else? :\

You can learn independence living right at home because you still learn to budget if you work, and whether you're at home or away you're still living off your folks and the gov't so. Neither is more or less character building but obvs the situations will be abit different.

Reply 21

Bang Outta Order

Original post by lizmoo0721

Hiya, I commuted first year and it was honestly the worst decision I've ever made. Part of university is definitely moving out and gaining that independence. You will have no social life, won't be able to make full use of the facilities and societies, and it was quite embarrassing leaving things early to catch the train home before they get too quiet. You can always go home at the weekends if it isn't too far.

lmfao who repped this?! And if the op lives in the city they can take the tube and cabs anytime...
the only people who can say "you won't get this" from either experience have to have experienced both

or you're speculating and misleading

Reply 22

lizmoo0721

Original post by 0to100

lmfao who repped this?! And if the op lives in the city they can take the tube and cabs anytime...the only people who can say "you won't get this" from either experience have to have experienced both or you're speculating and misleading

I've just completed first year at a university in London so I am not speculating. They are going to miss out a considerable amount of the socialising and friendships that are formed in halls as I did. I don't know how far into the city they live but they also need to take into consideration how far sports societies are because that is further commuting.
Do you study London too, people don't stay around the university to socialise, they go back to their halls, everyone just leaves, if you are commuting you are not really given the opportunity to meet many people other than those on your course and through societies.

Reply 23

Sarah1778

I regret not moving out for my first year because I feel like I'm not independent and my freedoms are limited at home, eg I can't go out when I want, can't socialise with uni friends when I want
It feels too much like school or college, it doesn't actually feel like I'm going uni. I miss out on a lot of events, and a lot of support too from the uni such as I can't see my lecturers as freely. My journey is around an hour and a half by train/bus in London, which affects how much time I can spend in the uni researching and stuff because I get disorganised and don't find large blocks of time to do work as I'm traveling.

The up-side is I have saved a lot of money; my monthly train/bus pass is around £66 whereas monthly fee of uni accommodation would have been around £400 excluding food etc.I do get to stay close to family and friends which has it's ups and downs. I get to keep my existing job and don't need to transfer. But it's still not the same experience.

If you're concerned about the money, it's definitely not recommended. If you're concerned about the experience, it's definitely recommended.
Imo I would recommend living out the first year and spending the other two plus years at home.

Reply 24

pointblank91

I'll be living at home, I'm nearly 25 and lived with my ex for 3 years before moving back in with mummy and daddy. The whole independence thing doesn't bother me cause I've had/have it. My advice is learn to drive and get a car then you don't have to rely on public transport and won't miss things. My commute is going to be a 35min drive which is nothing considering it takes me an hour to get to work atm.

Reply 25

jonathanemptage

Why not live out first year and by February when you need to start looking at a new place you'll know what you want to do.

Posted from TSR Mobile

Reply 26

Napp

It will save you a tonne of money but you loose out on the experience.

Reply 27

Legendstatusxoxo

Original post by super_kawaii

You will miss out a lot. It'll prove a lot harder for you to make friends as you won't have the ready made group of your flatmates, and it'll be harder for you to go to impromptu events that are so common at uni, such as parties or days out. How will you get back after events or societies?

Also, you're going to have to move out at some point, and uni's the perfect opportunity to do so, as you get all the independence, but there's still so much support available if you get homesickness.

I've suffered from severe homesickness before when I lived abroad and was banned by my family from leaving the country I was in, so I know how it feels. You just have to get involved with as much as possible so you don't think about home, and it'll be easier to do so if you live out

Is saving a bit of money really worth missing out on an essential part of uni life? The social and extracurricular side of uni is just as important as the academic side-for graduate jobs, your final grade is nothing but a tick in a box. They expect to see a wide variety of extra curricular activities and responsibilities to prove you fit the person spec. I know this, because I've just landed myself a graduate job

What do you mean by banned?

Reply 28

Tsrsarahhhh

I'm doing the same. Everyone keeps saying you need to move out because you'll never learn independence but some are just not ready to move away. I have the rest of my life to be independent. At the end of the day do what feels right to you. It may be more difficult to make friends but not impossible, you'll still have friends from lectures. Living in halls also isn't all rosy it has many disadvantages. For example when it comes closer to exam times you won't have the peace and quite you need, meals may become difficult to make once exams come around thus leaving you eating crap or not eating healthy. The biggest advantage is you get to live in the comfort of your own house and save a vast amount of money.

Reply 29

Hevachan

I don't personally know anyone who commutes who regrets it (not saying there are no regretters). I commute and I wouldn't have it any other way. I love having my home comforts and i hate student accommodation and student 'banter'.. However i am a ' mature 'student at 23 and so it might be different for you.

Do you like clubbing? Societies? Socialising alot? If so, you'll miss out. However if you are an introvert (like me) then you might prefer living at home.. I must say though that moving to uni may give you more life skills but it could also make you miserable and homesick so you drop out (this does happen especially around Christmas time). So there's pros and cons but in my opinion you sound like you know what you want, but it wouldn't do any harm to at least look at the accommodation :smile:

Reply 30

ChargingStag

Original post by flowerlu

Exactly the same as you, I can't imagine leaving home for uni. I'm starting my first year this year though so I can't offer any personal experience yet. :frown:

I'll have about a 25 minute drive or a little longer if I get the train instead. I'll go with whichever is cheapest in the long run.
As for friends I'm not really that social anyway but I have been lucky in the fact that I know some people attending the uni already, so I can hang out with them and get to know other people. Some students work in the same place as me too so another bit of luck there. :tongue:

I have joined group chats for my course which has helped.
I think joining societies will be great in making up for the lack of accommodation friends if your uni has them. I plan on joining a couple!

Reply 31

super_kawaii

Original post by Legendstatusxoxo

What do you mean by banned?

They forbade me from leaving the country I was in as they knew it would make my homesickness worse if I came home. Bloody glad they did though, as it made me so much more resilient and self reliant.

You'll never learn anything or grow if you don't push yourself out of your comfort zone. Moving out of the parental home is one such step*

Reply 32

Legendstatusxoxo

Original post by super_kawaii

Ah okay, I read it as if they had banished you to another country and I was thinking that it was a bit harsh

Reply 33

TheUnknownDude

Don't bother. You're going to miss out on a lot if you live at home. Live out!!!

Posted from TSR Mobile

Reply 34

super_kawaii

Original post by Legendstatusxoxo

Ah okay, I read it as if they had banished you to another country and I was thinking that it was a bit harsh

I did languages, so I had to study abroad if I wanted to complete my degree.*

Living away from the parental home is definitely worth it. It makes you so much more resilient and able to rely on yourself, which will prove valuable in the future when you want to start a family yourself and ultimately when your parents die. Becoming self sufficient and self reliant is better done sooner rather than later

(edited 7 years ago)

Reply 35

chemphys

Money would be the biggest factor in this i believe , especially for a long course

Reply 36

New- Emperor

Original post by Tsrsarahhhh

not true in my halls we had a silent study area and there is always the libery*

Reply 37

username988933

Well I chose to live away from home for my first year, 40 minute train journey would of been too much for me everyday. Plus as a shy and quiet person, I felt that I needed to put myself out there more, build confidence and gain independence. Seriously it helped me grow as a person, (cheesy I know but true) even with flatmates that I didn't have anything in common with. We were civil (well except for one but he was really strange) and went out together now and then. But I would mostly go out with the people next door anyway, that's the thing, you have people in other flats to try your luck with so to speak.

I lived with people who refused to clean, who once a week kept me awake at night, all night by the way. It was hell at first, because I felt alone at times, but as soon as my course got going and I made friends (you tend to have more in common with people on your course) everything fell into place. In my case I could go home at the weekend if I wanted a break. But even with all the downsides, looking back there is no way I would decide to not live in halls. I made friends with next door, I was able to go out with course mates frequently, learned to be independent and proved to myself that I could do it. I can still be a nervous wreck at times but I'm improving.

Finally, I spent most days with my course mates until about 6. Had dinner and used the rest of the evening to do work. Weekends were work and spent doing chores, along with going out in the evenings. I was never bored after the 2nd week. If I can make friends and survive my flatmates, then I would say it is for most people. Plus I've become really close with my course mates due to spending so much time with them. This includes going to the library at weekends or in the week, to work together, makes your work way less boring. Thus I'm really excited to go back and move into the house, basically it will be all the perks of living away without the negatives. Also traveling home when I did tended to put me behind in work, because when you go home you tend to just want to enjoy your home comforts. Plus every journey would end with me being tired, if I left after a long Uni day. So I can see communiting to be extremely so.

May not be true for everyone, but from someone who was in far from a perfect scenario, I can tell you that by living away from home you gain so much, you will meet friends and I think that it makes moving into a house in the second year so much more enjoyable because you know them so well. You've decided to live with people who you know really well, because you can spend so much time with them. I see people on my course who comminute and they don't really know anyone on the course really. I haven't even joined a society, I actually just got to know even more people from a society due to one of my course mates being in the society. I'm definitely joining one this year, as I feel comfortable doing so, as I don't have to meet loads of new people on top of a society this year. Most importantly I would say, don't feel like moving away means you have no control over how much socialising you will do, nor the pace of said socialising. You still do. That was one of my concerns.

(sorry for the text wall, if you read all of it, well, jeez)

Reply 38

Rabbit20164

I commuted for 3 yrs whilst finishing my undergrad degree. I found it an advantage, because i'm an only child, and i never learned to work in a boiler factory. I found that most halls are that [at least the ones i ended up in]. I also wasn't an effective student - i didn't know how to study, or to direct my studying towards what would be on the upcoming exam. Working in a quiet environment is probably the only reason i ended up with a degree. If you are organised [at least more so than i was], and can devote yourself to your studies with a racket all around you, you may do well in halls. When i did my masters degree, i had been on my own for a few years, and had my own place - so the only thing i had to put up with was night classes [i was working full time], and studying in all my waking moments. Although i was older than many of my classmates, i persevered and managed to get my degree. Good luck & hang in there. It's worth it in the end. Hopefully, you are doing a course that will be salable after your graduate. Cheers.

Reply 39

Plantagenet Crown

Original post by lizmoo0721

I think the better word is generalising, because you are. Just because you had that experience doesn't mean all people in a similar position will.

I've just finished a 4 year degree in London and have lived at home for all 4 yeas and I didn't miss out at all. I've made great friends and was able to go to all the social events people in halls went to. It's about each individual person's ethic and motivation. You will also find people who live in halls who are antisocial and don't make the effort to go out and make friends.