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    Right, do any of you have any idea what I'm doing wrong here, I get told I'm a nice guy and that I'm attractive but I can't seem to keep anybody interested in me. To put this into perspective I'm almost 21 so I'm not a kid by any means and I'd like to think I'm quite mature.So my first girlfriend it simply didn't work out with, she left but it was on relatively good terms so I have no hard feelings towards her, my second girlfriend is what has completely messed me over - it was over a couple of weeks before Christmas and this ended on awful terms, I was cheated on multiple times, lied to and treated awfully but I kept going back, I kept getting hurt.Recently though, there was one particular girl who caught my eye, she's the most beautiful girl I've ever seen and she came to me, she initiated conversation and I couldn't believe it. So we went on a couple of dates and she said she had a great time, as did I. The way we kissed it felt like something more was around the corner but she then text me saying she couldn't see it going anywhere and despite the fact I'm gorgeous and a really nice lad, she wasn't feeling it.My question is; how can someone find me those things and it still not be good enough? Why can't I keep anybody around? What's wrong with me?If you've read all this then thank you, I needed to get this off my chest.
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    • Thread Starter
    #1

    Right, do any of you have any idea what I'm doing wrong here, I get told I'm a nice guy and that I'm attractive but I can't seem to keep anybody interested in me. To put this into perspective I'm almost 21 so I'm not a kid by any means and I'd like to think I'm quite mature.So my first girlfriend it simply didn't work out with, she left but it was on relatively good terms so I have no hard feelings towards her, my second girlfriend is what has completely messed me over - it was over a couple of weeks before Christmas and this ended on awful terms, I was cheated on multiple times, lied to and treated awfully but I kept going back, I kept getting hurt.Recently though, there was one particular girl who caught my eye, she's the most beautiful girl I've ever seen and she came to me, she initiated conversation and I couldn't believe it. So we went on a couple of dates and she said she had a great time, as did I. The way we kissed it felt like something more was around the corner but she then text me saying she couldn't see it going anywhere and despite the fact I'm gorgeous and a really nice lad, she wasn't feeling it.My question is; how can someone find me those things and it still not be good enough? Why can't I keep anybody around? What's wrong with me?If you've read all this then thank you, I needed to get this off my chest.
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    There are quite a few possible reasons;
    -She found someone who she thinks is better than you, as she may have dated other guys.

    -She doesn't find you attractive and nice as she said- she only said it not to appear rude when rejecting you.

    -She might have not been ready for a relationship just yet.

    Those are the few reasons I can think off right now.
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    Those reasons above plus could be she may have only just got out of a relationship. I find sometimes you end up getting with someone when you are not actually looking.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I was cheated on multiple times, lied to and treated awfully but I kept going back
    Have you addressed this e.g. why you put up with this crap/resolved to do things differently going forward?

    how can someone find me those things and it still not be good enough?
    You'd have to ask her, but most likely she's saying the spark isn't there (often a function of [lack of] perceived boss-man qualities). Check out my related threads FYR (links in OP of this one)
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    (Original post by Foo.mp3)
    Have you addressed this e.g. why you put up with this crap/resolved to do things differently going forward?

    You'd have to ask her, but most likely she's saying the spark isn't there (often a function of [lack of] perceived boss-man qualities). Check out my related threads FYR (links in OP of this one)
    I put up with it because that's what I thought I deserved, I wasn't worthy of her in my eyes so whatever she did, I would have always gone back to her. What happened with her did change me as a person - I find it extremely difficult to trust anybody.

    As for the second point, I think you've hit the nail on the head - I've been told that I'm too nice. I liked this girl for a while and then when I took her out we got on extremely well, better than I imagined anyway. This is what has confused me, we get on well, we have a laugh but can be serious too, it seemed great.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    What happened with her did change me as a person - I find it extremely difficult to trust anybody
    I would suggest you work on your self-worth. Here's a good place to start to DIY

    I've been told that I'm too nice
    Definitely check this thread

    we get on well, we have a laugh but can be serious too, it seemed great
    Exemplar ingredients of a 'keeper':

    1) Seriousness: check
    2) Decency: check
    3) Confidence
    4) Rapport
    5) Fun

    Feel free to post in my threads/PM me for general advice/enlist my professional services, should you so wish - I've a few clients from TSR, most of whom have been in a similar position to yourself
 
 
 
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